Artistic Revisions
by MirrorKisses
Summary: Sequel to Broken Paint Brushes. It's really quite depressiing. It's really quite entertaining. It's slash. What else do you expect?
1. Chapter 1

**Title: Artistic Revisions**

Summary: Marco's life has changed somewhat, now he has a suicidal façade of a son, a jealous boyfriend bent of Hollywood domination and a hellova lot of empty champagne bottles.(Sequel to Broken Paint Brushes)

**-wink- I'm baaaaccccckkkkk **

**Author Note: I know you guys are wondering what exactly is going on with the whole situation of how I left things off, but have no fear, I'm back, the story is back and just as funny and dramatic as ever. So enjoy lovelies! This tale of deception, love and slashly ignorance is just beginning, I just hope that you guys sill enjoy this! And like…hey, how come no one noticed that there was somebody named Alex laying on Jake's bed? And omg...this is so fucking stupid, you know I can't reply to you guys anymore? Wow! I am so pissed, I shall find a way! I shall::squees and hugs all around: I couldn't wait, I must update! Hehe, rhyming!**

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**Chapter 1: The Short Weekend Begins** **With A Longing**

* * *

_Are you up in the middle of the night _

_Trying to figure out where things went wrong_

_And they did _

_It's just another semi bummer weekend _

_Seems hard to find the heart for the words_

_Though I'm sure they make complete scene _

_In your head_

_It's a light hearted movie and a splash of calamity_

* * *

_And when I dig too deep _

_When I get too high _

_I'll never ask of you_

_I'll ask of _

_When I talk too much _

_don't talk enough_

_I'll never ask of you I'll ask of_

_And when I fall apart upon the weekend _

_And the pills begin to stop working _

_When I'm out of line _

_Just too aligned _

_I'll never ask of you I'll ask of _

_I'll never ask of you I'll ask of_

* * *

Marco closed his eyes; the wind flew through his face and against his skin. His cheeks were rosy red from the October weather and he wasn't in the mood for any disruptions anymore, not like last time. He was on the roof now, just trying to escape the realities of life, the little "Yes" and "No" that people say, the occasional lie, the first kiss…the last…

He stopped thinking when someone came up behind him. "Hey" They said uneasily.

"Have you ever wondered what I'd be like to just take off, fly and leave everything behind?" Marco asked, raising his arms in the air like a pilot and coughing a little bit.

"Every day…but then I look at you, and Michael and everybody else and I remember why I stay" Ryan said softly," Like I'm pretty sure you do. Is it my fault that you blame yourself?"

"Don't be silly" Marco said, rolling his eyes," Of course not, I blame myself because if I was a good parent I'd stop this from happening"

"All good parents are blind occasionally" Ryan said, moving up next to him and slinging an arm over his shoulders," Jumping off anything won't help anyone, Marco, remember that"

"Oh, I know I'd never do that" Marco sighed out, "I was wondering how Trent could. How can you just do something like that and not regret it?"

"He's dead, you don't know what he regrets and what he doesn't" Ryan looked above into the skies," I bet he's kicking his ass up and down the streets right now"

"It doesn't matter, Adrian's gone too…" Marco blinked for a second," Everybody that Michael needed is gone…especially Jake. I mean really, remember all that shit that he put him through? This wasn't some tiny teen angst either; I mean some real serious things. How could he ever do that to a person? How could I have let him do that?"

"I have something for you…I don't know if you'll want it though. I made it a few days ago, from memory" Ryan said timidly. "It's downstairs if you want to see it"

Marco looked at him strangely," I have a question first. Do you mind?"

Ryan shook his head no.

"If you came to the conclusion that it was time for a change, that you needed to make the ultimate sacrifice would you do it? Even if it meant hurting yourself and maybe even others?"

"In a heartbeat" Ryan replied automatically. "Life wasn't created for us to sit back and enjoy it, we need a little black and blue to beat a rotation, you know?"

"Ahh Ryan, quoting Franz Ferdinand again?" Marco smirked as he turned towards the side of the roof and proceeded to slide down and loop himself into the window. It was a trick that he had mastered while Spinner, who was drunk at the time, had landed Jimmy's wheelchair full of vodka up there. Long story. Ryan was right behind them.

As they walked through the house they noticed the tiny changes that were made. The fact that so many people were in it now, especially since school started a lot space needed to be made. The basement had turned into the nursery for Tilly, also Mike and Mark moved down there. Sarah and Lizzie shared their own room, which was divided down the middle currently, Robert and Michael shared the other room, which was pretty quiet most of the time, incept from the occasional whimper of sadness from Michael and the occasional "Everything will be alright" lie that Robert would whisper back, and then Marco and Ryan's room, all of which were beautifully decorated.

Marco got inside first and sat in the new chair that they had just got. It was dark black to go with the leather curtains that Andy had picked out for the room. The room its self was Wine red with black carpeting and curtains. The two beds, which were at the other corners of the room, were red sheets with black pillows (there was desk in the corner that little people noticed, since Marco covered it up a lot that held their skirts and champagne. He got tired of hiding it under the bed because the bottles broke so easily) and the curtains themselves, along with the guest chair, were leather. The computer sat in the corner while Ryan's easel was positioned nest to his bed, which also had the window view. Marco had his own personal desk and reading light plus a ton of books to read and review and all of his assignments that he needed to catch up on, unless he'd be out of a job.

"So where is it?" Marco asked, sort of eagerly.

"Here…" Ryan trailed off and pulled the cover off the easel. "It's my art project for the follow up to My Fair Fantasy. They wanted something edgy…"

"It's Jake" Marco's face fell.

He looked at the picture; Ryan did an excellent job though, and tilted his head to the side. He drew Jake sitting on a mirror; everything about his aura was black, from the clothes that he wore right down to his facial features. The mirror was sort of titled back, so you could see the reflection, which was of someone else crying in the mirror. Three guess who it was.

"Out of all the uncertainties in life, some are always revolving" Ryan whispered," Hence the name Crimes of Passion"

Marco smiled," its…good"

"You don't like it?" Ryan asked, confused.

"No, it's wonderful, I'm just…amazed as always with your drawing" Marco sighed out.  
His cell phone buzzed in his pocket, he looked at the screen and snapped it shut.

"Who was it?" Ryan asked, clueless.

"Never mind, hey, want to go shopping?" Marco asked, getting up and grabbing his keys.

"For clothes?" Ryan asked, his face already falling. It's not like he didn't like it, because he did, he fucking loved it, but when you've been to Macy's with Marco, it's a whole different story. There's lots of scratching and hair pulling involved…and that's what normally happens when you do it to yourself for agreeing to be there in the first place.

"For food" Marco corrected. He jingled the keys to his car and winked," come on, you know you want to try him out"

"Don't you mean her? Car's are normally feminine" Ryan pointed out.

Marco looked at him," I know you know me better than that. I named him Sky; I have a hankering for boys with earth names this month"

Ryan laughed at his best friend's humor," Okay, let's see how fast Sky can ride"

"Alright!" Marco said, throwing his cell phone down and heading out the door.

He looked at the cell phone as he passed by to see the name "Dylan" written on it with a little skull and crossbones next to it. Marco sure was animated. Ryan grabbed his coat and called out "Coming" as he tried to catch up with Marco.

He could already hear Marco giggling down the steps.

* * *

"Marco! Tree!"

"Marco! Fence!"

"Marco, oh for god's sake, don't hit the old lady!"

"That's the same bitch that whacked me with her purse last time!" Marco said, veering to run the woman down, but Ryan grabbed the wheel and pulled him back onto the road. It was become a sort of habit that Ryan play the annoying game of "Don't Let Marco Crash Into Things!" for which he always won, of course. And today was no exception; Marco had a bad case of road rage and the whole world to take it out on.

"Squirrel!"

"I see it!"

"Cat!"

"I know!"

"Tug boat!"

"What?" Marco asked, looking around. "Oh…tug boat!" He said, swerving back off the docks and onto the street.

"Alex Kapranos!" Ryan yelled.

Marco stopped the car in dead traffic," Where. I want him to sign my CD. That or make me one of his beautiful dance whores"

"Marco I was joking…" Ryan trailed off as in the rear view mirror he saw a car speeding up to them from behind. He hit the gas and speed off just as the guy came around, he also had road rage. It was almost in slow motion in Marco's mind. A young guy, 18, 20 or so, with light blue eyes and purple highlights speed past them, a girl clinging onto her seat belt in one hand and her cigarette in the other as she yelled at him to watch the mail box, which he ran over anyway, and speed off full.

"Marco…Marco?" Ryan snapped his fingers in front of him to snap him out of his new mode, "MMM…" Or Many Marvelous Men for short. It was sort of like DDM incept more…intense.

Marco gunned the motor.

"Marco…"

"He almost ran me over!" Marco cried, switching gears and gunning the car forwards.

"What about the groceries?"

"Fuck that, no one out does my damn road rage!" Marco snapped.

"Marco, Chinese food delivery guy! Who should I mention is extremely hot?"

Marco glanced out and grazed the boy's bike as he yelled out the window "Hot ass!" and kept on driving.

Marco trailed the boy down until they were side by side.

"How come the police never see this?" Ryan asked, shaking his head.

"Hey, bitch! Yeah, you!" Marco yelled out the window, the boy looking at him oddly. "Your ass almost ran me over, apologize!"

"You've got to be fucking kidding me" The boy murmured, rolling his eyes," No!"

"What?"

"I said nooooo shorty"

Marco tilted his head to the side," Oh no you did not just call me shorty"

The guy laughed at Marco, almost hitting an old lady. " Davis?" The girl yelled.

"Hey," He shrugged," That's the bitch that gave me the finger when I tried to get that box of ice cream…"

Marco blinked at him, holy hell.

"Hey, I was talking to you!" Marco yelled half his body out the window now. Ryan was very uneasily steering with his arms, which were sort of under Marco's legs the whole time. The same thing went for the girl.

"Oh, sorry. I only see your head. Look kid, you're an amateur, you're no road rager, just a simple teen with issues. So save your Dawson Creek, Felicity, All My Almost Real But I still Have No Life Children, dramatic self for someone who has the time, okay shorty?" He threw his coffee onto Marco's window shield and hit a lamp post as he drove away.  
Ryan drove down the block before turning to look at Marco. " I want him!" He growled out.

"How do you know he's gay?" Ryan laughed out.

"Hello. Gay 101 kid, I know you're new, so I'll explain. He liked ice cream…and old lady gave him the finger and he named every drama that are more steered towards the feminine population that the male, hence he's gay. Hence he's in my pants." Marco said," Oh, turn left here; we're taking a short cut!"

"Wha-" Ryan began when Marco stole the wheel from him, made a sharp left and steered off the edge of the corner that they were already driving on and into an alley. Going about 125 he made another left, through the park, almost killing a few more squirrels and up a garbage disposal ramp. From there the car went over a gate, down another ally way, and through some trees again before going up another ramp. " What the hell is…ahhhh! Truck, truck!" Ryan yelled, trying to grab the wheel but Marco slapped his hand away.  
"I know what I'm doing!"

"The fuck you do!" Ryan said, closing his eyes shut. They were going to die…they were going to die…

"We're here" Marco cheered.

"Huh?" Ryan uttered out. He opened one eye, slowly. They were in the front row of the parking lot for the grocery store. "I never used to get here early enough but since I have that sort cut, I'm guaranteed a spot" Marco said happily.

"Marco…you're one strange kid" Ryan sighed out.

"I know, now come on, I want to get that new chocolate that came out by Miss Nelly" Marco smiled, hopping out the car and walked off towards the store, Ryan close behind. As they walked into the now slightly heated Store, as apposed to last time's air conditioning Ryan looked at himself in the mirror. His hair, which was almost 2 times shorter, staid tucked attractively under his white hat with the occasional wisp of Hair poking out at the ends. His white scarf, wrapped around his neck once matched his cream jeans jacket and jeans themselves. His eyes were a little tired though, but that's what happens when you spend the night reliving 99 Bottles of Beer on the wall at Brian's house instead of studying for a test which he failed.

Marco on the other hand, looked oh so fabulous as usual. Ryan smirked a little, what a fashion freak. Marco's hair, which was recently dyed to have Blonde streaks in it with flipped out at the sides and still boyish adorable. His bangs however were gone, having been long replaced with instead a fringe of hair that went from one corner for his head to the other, and made a cute little curl at the end. His outfit of choosing? A red shirt under a black blazer with a red button that read "Officially Pink" on it and a pair of matching black pants too. The blazer remained unbuttoned however, and his nails were oddly painted a shade of wine red, matching the room. He claims it's for a new look that he's creating, "The Polish Revolution" but Ryan thinks it's because he just likes Nail Polish.

"I look bad, don't I?" Marco asked, catching Ryan looking at him.

"No, I was looking at the cashier in aisle 6" Ryan lied.

"Oh…"

"You look fine!" Ryan said, petting Marco's hair," You know you do. So let's get the damn items and go back home and have some coffee?" Ryan said, taking a cart and wheeling it next to him. "Or…a little champagne" Ryan whispered into his ear softly," There's some business we need to attend to"

Marco slapped his hand playfully," Behave!"

Marco internally went off his list, Chocolate, Champagne, two new candles, a box of sardines (his mom was trying another Oprah magazine) some lotion and a new brush for his hair. Ryan however needed a paint brush, some chicken nuggets (it wasn't a fetish!) and some shampoo. "Chocolate first!" Ryan declared, taking the cart and walking away. Marco finished drooling over aisle 6 boy and caught up with him." Miss Nelly, Mister Peterman's, Misses Butterworth…a lot of chocolates are married"

"Oh…Miss Nelly!" Marco called out, grabbing the box as soon as someone else did.  
He looked up, the old woman stood in front of him with her arm in a sling." You're the son of a bitch that almost ran me over" She cried out in a shrill voice.

"And yet your still here…" Marco drawled out," Look lady, I was here first, so just give me the damn box already!"

"Such language!"

"You just called me a bitch!" Marco snapped.

The old lady whacked him with her good arm," Let go you young tyrant!"

"Let go you old bitter shrew!" Marco yelled, pulling back.

"Marco…maybe you should just let her take the box…" Ryan trailed off.

"Keep your wispy looking boyfriend out of this!" The old lady yelled.

"Wispy?" Ryan snapped.

"Boyfriend!" Marco snapped.

Ryan came over and started pulling on the box in Marco's favor.

"Excuse me mam, is there a problem?" The cute aisle 6 guy asked as he came over there.  
Ryan closed Marco's mouth before the drool began to show.

"These boys won't give me this box of cookies…that I had, it was for my grandson whose in the hospital" She said softly in a broken down old Lady voice.

"Bullshi-"Marco began but Ryan covered his mouth.

"Plus they tried to sexually harass me!" She continued on.

"What?" Ryan asked.

"Impossible"

"Really?" The cute boy asked, "You sort of look like the molesting type"

"What!" Marco snapped," Look here-"He paused to mumble" extremely hot guy in tight fitting uniform". He looked up again," We don't want her saggy ass for one soul reason"

"And that would be?"

"We're gay, damnit!" Marco snapped.

"Sure…" the boy said, rolling his eyes.  
0 Marco turned to look at Ryan. He shoved him against the row of cereal behind them and kissed the crap out of him.

" See?" Marco asked, holding Ryan up. "Gay! Now give us those damn chocolates lady"  
But the old woman was already gone with the box.

Marco sighed," Damnit. Come on Ry; let's get your things…"

But Ryan was on the floor, a little dazed by what just happened.

The grocery boy winked at Marco.

* * *

I had way too much fun writing this chapter. I hope you guys don't mind that I started off on a lighter note! 


	2. The Short Weekend Begins With A Longing

**Chapter 2: The Short Weekend Begins With A Longing Pt.2**

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* * *

**

I'll reply to you guys one by one next time!

* * *

_And just like that _

_We'll snap our hands _

_And all will turn to white on white _

_Does everything have to be such a tragedy _

_Let's sell the world with one clever line _

_And sell it back at double the asking price _

_Or triple _

_It's a crazy world, someone should sell some tickets_

* * *

Remy placed the ice pack to his eye," You know what, this is sick, some strange conspiracy of some sort, I know you had all of this arranged somehow"

Jake smirked at him," Maybe I did. You'll never know, ohh…the eye seems to hurt a lot"

Remy glared at him," Is it me or do you take joy in other people's pain?"

Jake flinched. "Does my pain turn you on?" Michael asked, his pale eyes scanning Jake with interest

"Jake?" Remy asked, waving his hands in front of his eyes. Jake snapped back," Don't do that. And yeah, I'm a machinist for pain. And get off my bed, your bed is on the other side of the room. Oh and some ground rules, around 11:30 at night…don't be awake."

"Why-?"

"Just don't" Jake said, icily. " Now move, I want to get ready for the meeting that going to happen in a few minutes"

"What meeting?"

"All the older kids and head leaders meet in here and chat things out. What needs to be fixed and so on and so forth" Jake smiled," Besides, the head kid is gonna be here too, you need to make a good impression. I heard he's a real pain"

Just as Jake finished that sentence someone knocked on the door. Jake moved over, adjusting his tie and smiled as he opened the door. 6 boys came into the room, taking places anywhere a seat would be available and started minor chit chat.

"So…" Remy leaned in," Which one's the asshole I'm going to have to kiss up to?"

Jake smirked as he clapped his hands," Okay, let's begin this session"

"Sir?" One of the boys asked.

"Yeah" Jake asked.

"Sir?" Remy asked, squinting in confusion.

"When we start the meetings from now on will we always have to bow down to you?"

Jake smiled again," No-"

"Don't be stupid" Another boy said," We all know that was last years' thing"

"Very good Alex"

"Please, Jake" Alex rolled his eyes," We all know what you're trying to pull here"

Jake coughed a little," Ahem"

"Sir"

"Good boy"

"Why is everybody calling you sir?' Remy asked, still confused.

"I'm the person you have to impress" Jake smiled," Meet the head kid"

"You've got to be kidding me" Remy sighed out.

"Sir" Jake added.

"What?"

"You have to say sir"

"Hell no"

"I'm telling you it's better if you didn't resist-" Jake began but stopped short." You know what? Forget it, I tried being nice, you can have things the hard way then"

* * *

_Saw you walk out last night_

_side walking junkies filled with hazy thoughts _

_Oh yeah_

_Beginning of my snow storm day dreams _

_You're a drug hit to my sanity _

_An acid trip to my well being_

_Yeah, yeah yeah_

_As the doctors prescribed a well mannered lad _

_In the ever growing well mannered fad_

* * *

"Michael, did you finish your homework?" Marco called from downstairs. He was trying to help his mother with the dinner before going upstairs to finish the rest of his report for the month of October. " Ex-Boyfriends: Past Lost or Future Gained?". And so far he only had 2 sentences typed up.

But then he remembered that Michael didn't talk.

"Ma, will he ever talk?"

"Marco…you have to give him time, he's experiencing a great loss…" His mother trailed off," 3 great losses. Give him time to cope"

"He's had 2 months!"

"Were you like that when your father left?" She snapped.

Marco remained silent," That was different then…he was family"

"Marco, Trent and Adrian were family to him…and Jake, well he was something entirely worldly."

"I don't understand why we're still paying for his tuition since he doesn't live with us anymore" Marco said, running a hand through his hair.

"Because you love him"

"He was my son"

"He is your son"

"Tell that to him"

"No…"

"You know we still have his number in the corner of my drawer upstairs"

"And it will stay there" Marco said, dropping a bit of parsley into the sauce," Let it simmer mom. Then take it out. I'll be back in 5 minutes" Before she could make out another word he went up stairs, grabbing his book bag on the way up.

Before he went into his room he stopped at Michael's and knocked on the door.

But then he remembered again and went inside and sat down next to the shaken boy. " Hey…" Marco said softly as Michael looked up, snapping his book shut and squinting a little bit.

"I was just won- ahh the what the hell happened to your hair?" Marco asked, looking at Michael's now dark blueish black hair.

Michael gave him another look. He moved his lips slowly so Marco could understand what he was mouthing. 'My hair was never red'

"It wasn't?" Marco asked, confused," But it looked so…real"

'I give a good dye job' Michael replied as Marco looked away for the snide remark. He still didn't understand why he wouldn't talk to him, but this was probably as good as it was going to get for a while. Marco reached up and touched the frosted blue tips, the hair style looked familiar…

_As the casket was placed into the ground Marco observed the boy, Adrian, who Michael was completely in distress over. They did a good job for the 'funeral' actually, his skin had a wonderful glassy look to it, his black eyes were turned back to their normal blue and his hair, which was swept back away from his face, held a hint of winter in Marco's opinion. It was a light blue with streaks of black in it, almost like a winter sky in the evening._

"Adrian" he murmured as Michael's eyes lit up.

"What?"

Marco blinked at him," Did you just talk…?"

"What did you say about Adrian?" Michael insisted.

"Noth-"

Michael shot him a sharp look.

"I was just thinking about how that was the same hair color of…Adrian, before he died and all…" Marco trailed off.

Michael looked back down to his notebook and touched his hair. Yeah, he knew it was the same color hair style, he did it purposely, to show that he still had a little bit of spunk left in him. Plus, he was getting tired of the fire red that he had in his hair before. Hair dying was a trait that he picked up from Adrian to trick people into thinking they never met you before. The less they knew, the better, and that normally meant double the money.

"So are you…okay?" Marco asked, his was uneasy about talking to Michael now.

Michael looked at him and then went back to writing in his notebook.

Okay…guess he wasn't talking again.

Marco sighed and patted his leg before getting up and leaving the room," Whenever you happen to decide to talk, you know where I'll be at"

* * *

Ryan sat inside the chair with the speaker phone on, it was a 2 way actually since Andy and Pete were over at Brian's house at the moment. " Okay, okay fine…all superheroes do not need to wear spandex" Andy sighed.

"Okay then" Pete smirked on the other line," Thank you"

"Look, all I wanted to know was why the hell exactly you're not over at my house instead of being over there with your husband?" Brian teased." There's plenty of room"

"Of course there is" Ryan rolled his eyes," But I want to stay here with Marco, besides, he sort of…I dunno…needs me to help balance out the house"

"Right…" Brian trailed off.

"Hey, I thought we agreed that I'd have a shot at him first" Andy complained.

"Who likes Marco?" Pete asked, suspiciously.

"You know…I'm not like…completely out over here" Ryan whispered.

"You haven't told!" The three of them yelled at Ryan at the same time.

"It slipped my mind…I guess"

"Right…" Brian said again. "Just like it slipped your mind that you didn't tell him what amazing of a time you had in that hotel ro-"

"What?" Pete asked, knocking over his plate over at Brian's house.

"Hey, watch the fur!" Brian snapped.

"You didn't tell Pete?" Andy asked, smiling a little bit. It hurt to see that Ryan was getting messed up, but this was all far too amusing.

"No, no one told Pete anything" Pete said angrily.

"Now Pete" Brian said, petting Pete's head," What did I tell you about talking in the third person?"

"That Ryan kinda sorta…I dunno how to put this" Andy trialed off.

"Someone better fucking tell me something" Pete snapped.

"You know, for a poet, your such an impatient person" Brian said teasingly.

In the background you could hear someone cursing and then a glass shattering," Ahhh fuck, my carpet" Brian yelled out.

"I'll tell you…" Ryan said. Marco walked into the room," In an hour. Okay? Anyone up for a little boys night out?"

"Hell yes" Andy cheered," Can we play that fabulous game again?"

Ryan hung up the phone. He got up off of the bed and smiled up and Marco, who was falling onto his bed on the other side of the room. He pulled his shirt over his shoulders and threw it to the floor, pulled out a chocolate from under his pillow, stuffed it into his mouth and closed his eyes while falling back and hitting the pillow," I hate Monday, Rye"

"I can tell" Ryan smiled, sliding out of the bed and onto his feet, "Look, I'm going to spend the night over at Brian's"

"Why?" Marco asked, a little dispointed," You said we had business to attend to"

"We can settle it another time" Ryan said as he crossed the room and closed the door," Night"

Marco sighed," Yeah…night"

* * *

_"I—" Adrian stopped and swallowed. That heart stopping jaw dropping tear jerking silence rolled over the two of them, him with pale cheeks and lowered eyes, the other with disgust and hatred._

_"I love you-" Adrian was cut short when the person held up a hand._

_"Stop…Adrian, right there. No, you don't love me. You don't fucking know what love is" They said it harshly, sweeping the hair back from their face and throwing their cigarette down to the floor. They held a demeaning stature, their hands on their hips, eyes burning into Adrian's soul and shoulders squared back. " Love is a silly catch phrase that people use to get other's attention, it's just a word. A noun. A specific little thing that America perceives today as the answer to all your problems and needs"_

_Adrian's face fell to the floor," But you said—"_

_"I say a lot of things. When I came here…to you, before any of this" They gestured around the room," Happened, all this chaos and destruction I didn't think that this-" They stopped, pointing to the ring on their finger," Would be the outcome. Adrian, I don't need a marriage right now, possibly not ever. And if it wasn't for you and your fucking petty attempt to wed me, and get me into the perfect frame of what you consider that all American family, with white picket fences and tanning beds and trophy wives and block parties, you have another fucking thing coming"_

_Adrian took a deep breath, pushed himself away and looked around the room. People were scrambling in ever direction, people were crying, some were singing, others were laughing. And there he stood, in the middle of everything." I don-"_

_"I know you didn't want to make things complicated" They whispered, suddenly inches away from his face. They took a hand and placed it under Adrian's chin and pulled it up wards so he could look them straight in the eyes," It's not your fault if a myriad of what is and seems to be has corrupted your little icy black hair. You learn as you live—" They paused, a teasing soft smirk played on their lips as they used their other arm and pulled Adrian up, closer to them," It drives me absolutely mad when you pout like that"_

_Adrian pushed him away," No…just don't…touch me…or …anything, matter of fact…" He stuttered his words out, his eyes hitting the floor again and his lips drying quickly," I wanted to be relieved of all the pains of 'Oh do they like me' …" He stopped," I wanted to be with you"_

_"I know" They said, confidently._

_"So if you know why don't you do something?" Adrian snapped. "I love yo-"_

_"Ahhh" They stopped him short, placing a finger to his lips and smirking a little at the involuntary flinch that his body gives off," I don't have to do anything to you, Adrian. Because I've told you…time and time again…that I don't think that love is possible, that what we happen to share…what ever that may be, is the reason that we're here now, at your brother's wedding."_

_His breath hitched a little as they slung an arm around his shoulders a pulled him close," Adrian, you're destined for better things, bigger brighter wonderful things. You don't need me tagging along for the ride, now do you?"_

_Adrian peeked up." Yes, every second of it"_

_"Then go find yourself someone to bride" They said, harshly pushing away._

_Just as he did the bride's mate threw the bouquet of flowers in the air and landed into Adrian's hands._

_

* * *

_

Michael sat inside his room alone, is pale fingers skating lightly over his arm, gently fingering the small gashes and cuts that were rowed neatly up and down it. It had been such a long time in his mind since everything changed.

His mind was in a whirlwind

First Trent's death.

Then Adrian's.

Then moving into the house.

Then taking care of Tilly.

Then Jake and his final good-bye

Then the note.

Then school.

His grades were suffering.

His mind was melting.

And all of this was Jake's fault.

He knew it, and so did everybody else. He knew that Jake couldn't help it, that it was the way that he was, how he thought before he did something. He wished Rory was still alive so they could sort things out. He wished that he was able to stand up for himself. He wished that he could just get over this fucking crush.

But everybody knew it wasn't a crush.

_"STOP MAKING IT ALL ABOUT FUCKING YOU! I can't! Don't you think I've tried…I've tried…I've tried so fucking hard…but I can't, you have me wrapped around your fingers ever so well…"_

Michael flinched and rolled around in the covers a bit, he wasn't getting any better.

In fact, by the fever that was brewing inside of him and the sudden tremors every now and then, he was getting worse.


	3. Your Diary

**Chapter 3: Your Diary**

* * *

**Hey everyoe, things have been sort of hetic with the story, si U can't review and reply to each of you, but thankies ll of you and Azury I do hope you feel well soon, I don;t want you being sick, Especially in the fall, it's more dangerous**

****

* * *

****

_The year two thousand _

_And I'll be back on the dole_

_Single and free_

_The best we'll ever be_

* * *

"Okay, Michael, let's look at that arm of yours, shall we?" The doctor asked calmly as Michael moved around in the chair, quickly glancing around the room and shaking a little.

Marco leaned over and whispered," He's been having panic attacks lately"

"All side effects of the medication" The doctor said, watching Michael with interest," How severe is it?"

"Moderate, it's just that he…won't talk to anyone, incept for Tilly" Marco sighed.

"The girl?" The doctor asked.

"Yeah" Marco stated," He's a wreck"

"And have you heard from that boy, Jake?" The doctor asked.

Michael's head snapped up quickly, his body stilled and his breath hitched," Where?" He asked, panicked," Oh god, he's here? I have to get out of here…" He trailed off, tripping over the chair, falling backwards and out of it. He hit his arm on the desk next to him.

"See…he's talking" The doctor sighed," Just whenever someone of his past is mentioned, it's almost like…shock therapy" He paused, "Has he talked lately"

"Only when I mentioned Adrian's name-" Marco stopped short.

Michael was reduced to a sheer look of terror on his face," Oh god, you're right" Marco murmured," And is there anything to help him?"

"No, this is purely emotional, whatever damage that was done to him has long since settled into his mind, somewhere dark. He's harboring feelings of hate and pain and only he can unlock them." The doctor looked at Michael again," Get up off the floor, Michael, Adrian and Jake aren't here. It's just you, and me and Marco. Okay? No one to hurt you"

Michael looked around slowly before getting up and sliding back into the chair and folding his hands into his lap and looking down to the floor. " Let's see those arms, Mikey" The doctor repeated.

Michael shook.

* * *

"_ Let's see those arms, Mikey" Jake teased out, grabbing him and tickling him," Come on, come on! Rory said that we needed to hide before he finds us, and I have to make sure that your arms are okay!"_

_They were playing hide and seek inside the woods, a usual affair for the boys, and Michael had accidentally fell into a patch of poison ivy. Michael scratched them as he rolled up his sleeves to see his arms bright red from all the scratching," Maybe we need to put mud on it" Jake muttered._

_"It itches, Jakey" Michael said, his childish voice high pitched and happy._

_"Stop!" Jake said, slapping his hand away," That jus makes it worser!"_

_"But Jakey…" Michael trailed off, pouting," It itches a lot!"_

_"Let's find Rory and call a time out, maybe my mommy can put something on your arm" Jake said, taking his hand._

_"You're the bestest, Jakey" Michael murmured as Jake pulled them out of their hiding spot _

* * *

"Who is he talking to?" The doctor question as Michael rambled on about itchy arms.

"Jake" Marco sighed," Not again"

"He's done this before?" The doctor asked, intrigued," Normally patients need to be under hypnosis for this to occur"

Michael blinked and looked up. He pointed at the door.

"No, Michael, we still have 5 more minutes left, then we can leave" Marco said, glancing back at the doctor," What am I supposed to do, doc? He's a jittery mess, he will hardly eat, won't talk, regularly, won't sleep…"

"You need to set up an appointment-"

"Perfect, for next week?" Marco asked, eagerly ready to cure Michael of his issues.

"I wasn't done. You need to set up an appointment for Michael to go and see Jake" The doctor said calmly.

Marco just blinked at him," You've got to be fucking kidding me. Last time they were together was how this whole thing started.

"Precisely. So get them together so Michael can find the closure he needs or else…" He trailed off," Jake" The doctor snapped.

Michael twitched so bad he fell out the chair.

"This will keep happening"

Marco suppressed a laugh.

"Something funny?"

"No…I know this is a serious situation…but it just reminds me of this show, called Inuyasha where this girl tells the boy "Sit boy" and he automatically falls and it's kinda the same situation here…" Marco trailed off at the look the doctor was giving him. He coughed," But this is no laughing matter"

"I'll see you and Michael next week then, same time" The doctor said, nodding.

"Thanks Doc" Marco said, grabbing Michael's hand and pulling him up," Let's get you home, okay?"

Michael nodded desperately.

* * *

"Math is down the hall, Literature to your left, Science is on the third floor, room 302, Social Studies is room 406, fourth floor of course, and gym is on the first floor, the wide room behind the auditorium" Jake stopped," Are you getting all of this?"

"Yah… Yeah" Remy said, adjusting his shirt, " What's with the uniforms?"

"It's a statement of the school" Jake said proudly. He smirked. The tie that he wore, a pale black and blue tie with a button down blue shirt and black pants and his hair, which he let grow out a bit more over the summer so that now it was about down to his ears, he knew he looked good. " Be proud about it!"

Remy rolled his eyes," I'll see you later"

Jake checked his watch, smirking about. That "I-Know-Something-You-Don't-Know" smirk before turning around," Yeah…sure, around 3?"

"That's in the middle of Art class" Remy stated.

"Exactly" Jake smiled." Initiation, hello"

"I thought you were joking about that" Remy sighed.

"Never, and you better impress me" Jake said as he turned and began to walk away.

"Jake, come o-" Remy got cut off.

"Now now now, we don't want to be late for class now do we?" Jake said, shaking his head.

"What are we talking about the bell hasn't run-" Remy was cut off when Jake held a finger up in the air and silenced him, at the same time the bell rang," You were saying"  
He turned around, carrying his books and continued walking away.

"God, I hate him" Remy seethed as he walked to watch up.

* * *

"Marco, my main man" Craig said, high-fiveing Marco and winking at Jimmy," You sly fox"

"What can I say, he came begging and crying" Marco bragged," It was wonderful"

Spinner rolled his eyes as he poked Marco in the head," You've been watching too many episodes of All My Almost Real But I still Have No Life Children"

"Cut it out, Spin" Marco said, slapping Spinner's head away," I just feel pimp"

"Because you're banging a college dude" Craig finished.

"Exactly…" Marco stopped," Wait, no"

"What?" All the guys asked him," We thought you and Dylan were…like…maniacs in the bedroom"

"Well at least Spinner more than us" Jimmy teased.

"Dude, shut up" Spinner said." Seriously, hello didn't you say that you were…"

"Once…in a hotel room" Marco sighed, running a hand through his hair," And then he met…"

"Tall dark and balding" Craig finished." And then you proceeded to molest me for you're of personal endeavors"

"I was proving a point!" Marco defended.

"Right…" Jimmy trailed off.

"Look, you guys, don't make me go token gay character on you and wine about how you are all ganging up on me…" Marco smiled.

Spinner slapped him," Dude, you told them about that time in the bathroom?"

"What?" Craig and Jimmy asked.

"Um…no" Marco trailed off.

"I thought Marco was…wait you told them about that time in the bathroom at McDonalds!" Craig stuttered out.

"Well Marco obviously loves me more, because while he fools around with you in cheep bathrooms he was rotating my tires…all…night…long!" Jimmy stated proudly.

"Aww you guys!" Marco said, giving them all a hug.

"We are so gay…" Jimmy laughed.

"Okay, Okay, watch the fringe" Spinner said, slapping him away," I'm trying to grow mines like Alex Kapranos…"

Marco wheeled around to look at him," Dude, I love you."

"I know" Spinner smiled." Wait…I mean, huh?"

"This is getting awkard" Craig said," Can we just get to lunch?"

Marco wrapped an arm around him and Spinner," Okay guys!"

They shared a look, Marco was beaming

Yeah, he was getting some.

* * *

"Brian Brian Brian" Andy said, wagging a finger," Red looks so fitting on me"

"Aren't you supposed to say 'You'?" Brian asked, dully.

"I did…"

"No I mean…me…." Brian stopped," Never mind, just pass me the answer"

"Okay…grumpy" Andy said, tossing the sheet over to Brian while the teacher wasn't looking.

While Brian copied down answers on one side of the room Pete was scribbling away on his paper.

"Are you trying to set that thing on fire? Because by the way your writing, it might happen" Ryan said, glancing at him," Calm down, you act as if this is a final or something."

"Calm down?" Pete snapped," I can't!"

"Why?" Ryan asked.

"Because…"

"Because what?"

"My fucking boy friend cheated on me!" Pete snapped, causing his pencil to break.

Everyone looked up at them.

Andy missed the note that Brian threw back and it hit him in the head.

Ryan slid down to the floor, under his desk, pretending to look for something.

Andy had the sudden urge to yell out "Gay Drama" but held back, for personal reasons.

"Um…class settle down!" The teacher snapped.

But…no one was talking.

"I said settle down! Resume your work!" The teacher snapped again.

"Okay, issues" Ryan said," I said I didn't really cheat on you since…" Ryan trailed off, " Okay, look your right…but I can't take back what I did…and I'm sorry"

Pete looked up at him, flipped his sheet over and raised his hand," Done"

* * *

Michael tried to lay down, but he was having trouble seeing.

Matter of fact. He needed to sit down

Right then and now.

He fell backwards on to the floor with a dull thud and looked up at his ceiling sadly This…depression that he was experiencing was tearing him apart slowly.

It was if every time he blinked something would trigger a memory.

Sometimes he would just sit there, crying, because he couldn't do anything else.

Trent was gone…

That hurt

Jake was gone…

That stung.

But when Adrian died…

That burned….

It burned so badly.

And now he was left with this little girl, the spitting image of her dad, to take care of. He couldn't do it, it was like Adrian was still alive right there in the nursery. He picked himself up and grabbed onto the wall to steady himself as he made his way down stairs. He smiled at Mrs. Del Rossi as he passed by her and into the basement

He was surprised when he saw Robert rocking Tilly back and forth in the rocking chair, humming. He gave Michael a little wave.

Michael waved back.

He wasn't ready to talk to Robert…but he'd probably be the first one to hear his voice.

"Daddy" Tilly said happily, moving out of Robert's arms and walking over to Michael.

He cringed again," No sweetie, not daddy, uncle."

"Daddy" Tilly protested.

"Your daddy's name was Adrian" Michael said calmly, brushing the hair out of her face.

"No, Addy died!" Tilly cried out.

Michael's face went pale," Can you…" He trailed off, eyes pleading with Robert.

"Tilly, can you go and play with Mikey and Mark while I talk to Michael for a second." Robert asked softly.

"Okay…" She walked off in search of Mark and Mike.

Michael looked up at Robert with dull eyes." She called me dad…"

"I know…" Robert whispered softly, his eyes glowing darkly in the room. Robert actually got really handsome lately. He needed to make a change in himself, and try and win Michael over of course, since Jake was out of his system. His eyes linked with Michaels, but as usual, he pulled away first.

Robert's lips curled. " You know…" He stopped. " I was wondering…"

Michael stood there, unbalanced and looking like a disheveled drunk.

He stopped again," Michael, why don't you go to bed?"

"I ca- can't…" Michael stuttered out meekily," Not…tired…"

"Well then…stay here, and I'll go get us some tea, okay? Then we can finish off the homework, if you want…" Robert said softly.

Michael nodded," Just…relax" Robert continued, his voice smooth," Okay?"

"Yeah…" Michael said, his voice breaking.


	4. Your Diary pt2

**TruFate: **Thankies, I'd love to make the review longer, but school is being evil, as usual

**TearsOfEcstasy:** The couples? Ouumm...so hard, arg, I guess it's Ryan/ Pete, possibly Marco/Ryan. or Possible Marco/ Andy, possible Brian/Andy, Michael/Jake, possible Michael/Robert, possible Jake/Remy. possible Jake/Alex, Adrian/Nate, Adrian/Michael, Adrian/ Trent...pmmh...I dunno what elese, tahkines for reviewing

**Gypsy Prince**: Hey gavrilo, thankies for the review!

**Azury:** Poor baby, I feel your pain, um and no, spinner and jimmy and criag aren't gay, they were just teasing each other. And it's a physcitrist, he was making sure that Michal wasn't cutting again. I wish i could reply more, but ugh, school. so ciao! loves and prayers

* * *

**Chapter 4: Your Diary pt2**.

_Why'd you love him _

_He's asking you why'd you love him _

_He's asking you why you loved him_

_But you couldn't say why you loved him.  
Oh…_

* * *

"Why do you continue to push away loved ones?" Someone asked Jake, who was busy writing down notes in his class.

He blinked and shrugged," The same reason why you do, Alex, it's pretty simple actually. It's quite fun to see the look on your best friend's face right before they crumble to the floor, short of breath and shaken due to the fact that you, the only support system in their life, is leaving them because they are just tired of taking care of them."

Alex smirked, his light pink lips tightened around his pencil as he shook his head," No…" He paused, writing some notes down himself. "I do it because it's a way of life,"

"And I know that you did what you had to do" Jake offered a genuine smile at him. Alex was the closest friend he had at the moment, a sure spit fire with the intelligence and elegance of a real classy boy. He was well respected, caddy, coy and sarcastically genius, so him and Jake clicked automatically last year.

Alex knows everything. From how Jake got there to the abuse, to Marco, to Michael, to Rory…

All of Jake's problems were stored in his head.

And he wasn't about to spill him.

You see, Alex didn't have the cleanest past either.

"Well, I need you"

"I know" Jake said, sighing.

"Oh, you don't say it like that you asshole!" Alex suddenly laughed,." You make it sound like I'm part of your hetero-sexual mayhem"

"You're a special case" Jake winked.

* * *

Michael chewed on his pencil," Thank you , Robby"

Robert shrugged," Your welcome"

"No…I mean, thank you" Michael repeated, softly.

Robert blinked at him," So what about Tilly, does she really have any concept of Ad-"He stopped," Michael, are you okay?"

Michael was twitching on the floor again. (A/N: I'm sorry, but I know this is supposed to be serious, but it just makes me giggle when Michael twitches like that)

Robert pulled him back up," No, not at all. Or at least I don't think so" Michael whispered," It just hurts the way that I feel responsible for her now, her bearings and what not, I mean, I am responsible for a life now, how do you cope with that?"

"I'm responsible for 4 of them" Robert sighed, " How do you think I feel"

"Fragile…" Michael whispered, his hands shaking, making the tea swish in the cup violently.

"Michael?" Robert asked, reaching over and touching his arm, but Michael just snapped away," I- I'm so sorry…"

"You didn't do anything" Robert said reassuringly.

Michael blinked a couple of times," You know Robert, do you want to hear a secret?"

Robert nodded," Yeah…"

Michael's green eyes flickered to the floor and then back up, " Once…like a really long time ago, I met this person that promised me the world, that they'd always be there for me, to protect me, and to help me through all the trials and issues, whatever may come my way"

Robert nodded.

"I was really young, like, I maybe 4 or 5 when it happened. I remember it was a rainy day, because I caught a cold after it, when I met them for the first time. My dad was a singer, you know , and a pretty good one at that, but one day when he was over in Europe on some tour his plane crashed into the sea-"

"Same thing with my dad"

"Similar fates I suppose" Michael said coldly," My mom, if you were to call her that, was a depressed hair dresser, who eventually died from depression, or so they say. So what happened was that I was walking down the block, trying to figure out what the hell was I going to do with myself when I saw this kid and their brother, sitting on a bench, fighting"

"So I walked over there and went to go see what the hell the problem was, I couldn't hear this whole conversation"

* * *

_"Hey, hey Rory" Jake said, poking his brother,_

_"What, twat?" Rory asked, momentarily stopping his incessant rambling over the hot girl he saw today and looked at his brother._

_"Stop calling me that, you retard! Look, that kid is there, the one we saw before. He's staring at us"_

_"Why are you so interested in that dirty looking kid?" Rory asked, glancing over at Michael._

_"I like his eyes." Jake murmured._

_"Kid, look, your 4. Stop looking at other boy's eyes. You gotta focus on boobs!" Rory smirked, poking his brother," You're gonna be a ladies man"_

_"But I like his eyes…" Jake wined," I wanna be his friend"_

_"You said the same thing about the squirrel that you saw yesterday"_

_" Mr. Nuts was my friend"_

_Rory smirked," Mr. Nuts? Where do you get this stuff from?"_

_"Look, mister, I wanna be his friend-" He stopped when Michael walked right into him,_

_"Ow!" Jake snapped._

_"I'm so sorry!" Michael said, getting up and pulling him up," I just don't like it when people argue…"_

_"We were merely expressing our thoughts in a loud manner" Jake said coyly._

_"Stop throwing around your vocabulary, geek" Rory said teasingly," I told you about that"_

_"Don't mind my brother, he's a little slow"_

_"We're all a little slow in some areas" Michael shrugged, grinning._

_"Yeah, I guess" Jake shrugged," Hey, wanna be my friend?"_

_"Okay" Michael said._

_Jake hugged him._

_Michael blinked._

_Rory smirked. "This is the beginning of a twisted relationship" He murmured._

* * *

Robert blinked," Odd, how you two met"

"Yeah" Michael blinked a little:" It was like…perfect day. I mean…I never had a friend before. No one to talk to, or smile with, or joke with. When I met Rory and Jake…everything changed. I was actually wanted-"

"You're wanted now" Robert pointed out.

"But it's not the same feeling" Michael sighed.

"You're coping with 2 people's death" Robert said, " These things happen. You just need time alone,-"

"My doctor says I need to go and visit Jake one last time before I supposedly move on" Michael said quickly.

Robert blinked at him cautiously," So…are you going to do it?"

Michael looked at him, dull green eyes churning," Should I?"

Robert snorted," Your asking me of all people?"

"Yeah, you're the only one I trust" Michael replied, swallowing.

"Are you prepared for another break down again?" He whispered, staring darkly into his eyes," Can you handle your whole world crashing again?"

Michael nodded," I don't think I have a choice"

"Well then, by all means, get some closure, so maybe then you can regain your…self again, wherever that maybe and then, maybe then you can finally…" He trailed off, patting his leg," Move on"

Michael looked up at him.

"I'll go get some more tea" Robert said, hand slipping away, and got up.

Michael sat there alone, looking at his hands.

* * *

Randy smiled knowingly into the phone while Remy yelled at him," I want out of this school, now! Immediately! Can't you see that I'm getting beaten up everyday! And the food is so horrible! And why are you laughing at me?"

"You sound like Matt when he broke his arm"

"Matt broke his arm?"

"Opps, sorry, slipped my mind. He's okay…though, well, as okay as you're going to be, but enough about him, what about this school of yours? I heard that Jake was giving you a riveting time?"

"You know I hate it when you act dumb, though I've been doubting that it's acting-"

"Ouch, brother" Randy said sighing," Look, stop acting so frail and be a good boy and stop complaining!"

"Randy!" Remy snapped," I really don't like it here"

" Little brother, we all do things we don't like. I have to go, give it a week, I'm sure you'll fall in love with it then"

And with that he hung up.

He turned around to see Jake smirking at him.

* * *

Marco smiled a little, glancing down at the flowers on his bed and then at the card inside his hand. As Ryan wandered into the room, looking messy, hot, bothered and dazed and flipped down onto the bed, Marco sighed out a long and sullen breathy "Hey"

"Ugghhhmmm" Ryan murmured out.

"Hot enough for you?" Marco asked.

Ryan rolled his eyes," My lungs are incinerated" His eyes rolled up, "Hey, nice flowers"

"They're from Dylan…"

"What?" Ryan asked, siting up.

"They're I'm sorry flowers from Dylan" Marco repeated and then covered his mouth," You didn't know?"

"I'm kind of confused right now" Ryan said, laying back down," I don't need anymore drama, tell me in the morning"

"Drama?"

"Yeah"

"How am I drama?"

"Because you're queening out right now" Ryan sighed, turning over," And your name spells drama"

"It doesn't!"

"Marco, please, spare me"

"Look if you're talking about my neurotic abusive son and his best friend who happens to have severe emotions issues, I can't help that. If your talking about my boyfriend, who happened to be dating one of Hollywood's top actors I can't help it. If you-"

"Marco, shut up!" Ryan snapped," Christ, I have a headache, I've had enough issues on my own and I don't want to hear about anything anywhere near happiness at the current moment, so please, just let me get some sleep!" Ryan clapped his hands and the light on the side of the room snapped off.

Marco blinked in half darkness at him.

* * *

I have a little depression problem going on, as usual, so I'm sorry if I seemed drained and not perky in my reviews, like i normally do. I'm working on The Art Of Black Nail Polish. Remeber that story? It was my baby, my first story, I'm editing it and revising it. But if you guys want to check up on me, go to livejournal and go to the user name All For You Remy, no spaces though. You know? I hope you like this chapter as well, xoxx until next time 


	5. Sparks

**Azury: **Darling, glad to hear your doing better and my depression is what drives this story most of the time, don't worry, I am fine. And no Alex…is very much like Michael, very…very much like him, you'll see. Remy is rather annoying and you will hate what he does in chapter 13.…mmgpph hugggles for you and I hope you like this one as well. Cause the next chapter is even worse… 

**Gavrilo**: (I just got lazy of typing your full name) Thanks! And Ryan is the least of the sadness! Hope you like this as well

**Tears:** (AKA forgetful) we're all getting old, and you may spork him, thanklies for the review

**I know Autum and Lizzy would love to review, but are busy, so I hope they enjoy this as well. Okay, now remmeber the scene at the end of the final chapter? No…I mean the scene with Adrian and Mikey right before he died? Well this is like the prelude to it…right before it happens all over again, because you see, you're going to notice that Jake is acting different and that Michael is dangerously depressed…which means that someone;s getting hurt.**

**And who always gets hurt in my stories?**

**Michael, Yes I just spoiled you gusy, but it's true. So enjoy the angst oh and the party that is mentioned in here is setting up for the most sexually charged thing in this story ever,**

**

* * *

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**Chapter 5: Sparks**

**

* * *

**

_Jake swallowed slowly, his voice cracked and his body rigid._

_"My heart's racing" He whispered as Jake looked over at him, hardly moving from his head. His black hair, he dyed it black once he got there, a trick he learned from Michael, because he wanted a new look. It was cut so that it was up to his ears while his pink flushed cheeks focused on the ceiling above him and smiled a little bit," Of course, it should be"_

_He smiled at them," Michael"_

_"Jake" Michael smiled back._

_"It's odd that of all the things in life, all the pain, all the drama, all the love and all the hate we somehow maintain the most abusive heartbreaking coupling on this earth?" Jake asked, watching to air swirl around them._

_"No" Michael said with a slight gasp._

_"Why?"_

_"Cause, Jakey" Michael laughed out childishly," We're extraordinary, remember"_

* * *

Jake sat up and looked around the dorm room.

No Michael.

Just a snoring Remy who was screaming out profanities as usual.

Drunkenly he reached over and knocked the phone off the hook before blindly dialing in Alex's number," Want to go for a walk"

* * *

"I can't…like, get him out my fucking mind!" Jake cried, practically ripping his hair out: It's killing me-"

"I know" Alex nodded.

"What am I supposed to do?"

"Fight it?"

"Fight it?" Jake repeated," How?"

"I don't know, that's your issue" Alex shrugged," You're the one who pulled yourself into…this twisted song and dance-"

Jake flinched at the term as Alex continued," So now you have to pull yourself out of it"

"I'm not apologizing" Jake murmured.

"Of course you're not" Alex sighed, poking him in the chest, "You're too stubborn"

"I am not stubborn" Jake snapped.

"Yeah, yeah, sure. And yet, you're constantly putting yourself down due to the fact that the ying to your….yang is out there, hurt and alone because of you and even though you know you can fix the out come you refuse, ultimately tearing down whatever Decent non friend nerves that the two of you have left-"

"You know, I really get sick and tired of everyone hitting the raw nerve that is our friendship" Jake seethed.

"Oh, Jakey…Jakey Jakey Jakey…" Alex said, shaking his head," Friendship? Please try more like estranged acquaintance"

"Ouch" Jake muttered.

"I'm telling you the truth" Alex shrugged, and then he smiled a little," You know, there was always one thing that you never told me about you"

"That being?"

"What makes you tick?" Alex asked, glaring at him suddenly and poking a finger into his chest, "Because I'm dying to know what drives you for such destructive behavior" He poked him again," Are you one of those people who take pleasure from other's pain" He pushed him backwards a little bit," Are you purposely being like this or were you born this way?" He gave him one final poke until Jake was pressed against the ledge of the bridge that they were standing on, it was about a good 6 foot drop down to the bottom before the small little pond underneath them shown in the moonlight.

"I am not self destructive" Jake said, pushing off," Actually I am one of the most stable people that you'll ever meet-"

"Please" Alex rolled his eyes.

"I'm more stable than you!" Jake snapped, pushing him away.

Alex back down for a second, hurt and shocked at Jake's choice of words. But then he looked up, rushed right into his face and grabbed him by the color of his shirt," Well at least I don't go feeling sorry for myself, I faced facts and I know that what happened wasn't…it wasn't my fault" He stuttered the last part slightly, staring him down darkly," And I let go"

"Oh, no you haven't Alex! You hardly trust any boy now!"

"I trusted you, don't do this Jake, don't push me away like you do all the others." Alex sighed out, his grip loosening on his shirt, but Jake was still pressed against the edge of the bridge.

"Well, no one told you to" Jake said as he pushed off of Alex and flipped over the edge of the bridge. He fell backwards into the water. Alex looked down at him, surprised and then shook his head before heading back towards the campus.

* * *

_Trent walked over to Adrian and patted him on the shoulder," Hey brother, what's the matter"_

_"I-" Adrian trailed off, spinning around and throwing himself into his arms._

_"Okay…not the reaction I was hoping for" Trent said, hugging him back," But whatever"_

_Between sobs Adrian murmured out," Nate….I….he….we….wedding cake"_

_"Oh…" Trent said, "Why don't we sit down, I have a feeling that this may take awhile"  
After he sat his hysterical brother down in the chair he glanced around the room in search of Nate but didn't see him._

_"Nobody wants marriage" Adrian said dryly._

_"Can you blame them?" Trent laughed._

_"Look, your wife is a millionaire you are set for life" Adrian pointed out dryly, "Look at me, cold…and alone…and I'll be stuck with my 15 cats and 26 multicolored pot holders and then I'll end up winning the lottery ticket when I get 75 but loose it when I fall down the steps and break my back, but the cats break my fall and…" He trailed off, grabbing a glass but then going against it as he took the whole bottle and downed it._

_Trent blinked at him," Depressed much?"_

_"Much" Adrian gurgled out._

_"We're set" Trent whispered," You and me. You think I married her for looks? For charm? For love?"_

_"Trent!" Adrian said as he slapped him on the arm," You idiot"_

_"No, I'm a fucking genius" He corrected. " You know Adrian, its just the way you look at things"_

_"Whatever" Adrian said," It doesn't matter. The only true love of my life is gone"_

* * *

**(I write this part on an index card at 4:25 in the morning and I just felt like it had to be inside the storym that's why it';s slightly different from my writing than ususal) **

Due to the incessant pitter patter of the raindrops on his window seal, Jake finally decided to get off his butt and probably do something creative. It felt odd when he did get those sudden bouts of inspiration because normally he'd giddily tell Mikey, who'd happily be subjected to whatever his twisted little mind had concocted at the time, but there was no one with him, he was alone, scared and confused because being the blind asshole that he was, he pushed everything that he loved away from himself.

And he was left in seclusion.

But being one to crash his own pity party he wasn't about to apologize. It wasn't who he was. And he could always ponder that fact, but why should the semi self loathing stop there?

He glanced over at the computer. He could simply write Michael a letter and he knew that Michael would come running back in an instant, it was just who he was. And while that agitated the hell out of him, the fact that Michael was so dependent on others, he was glad that he was. As he thought about it, he was lucky he had Michael to begin with, someone who always defended him, took care of him, supported him.

So why was he doing this?

He had no explanations, no reasoning incept for the fact that maybe, just maybe, in some twisted way he was just as lost and hurt as Michael was. Maybe Michael was the one in control all along.

Maybe all those years of friendship were just some dramatic ploy to lure him into some realm where love and life and the ever reoccurring thought of "Have I finally achieved bliss?" came into play.

Or maybe he just needed someone else to blame all of this on.

But whatever the reason may be the main point was that this might be the end. The final straw. His last mark against his own self. That he supposedly jumped so far off the proverbial cliff that maybe good old Mikey may not be coming and running back.  
And that just scares him a little more that he'd admit.

Just as he was about to close his eyes, block out all the depressingly negative thoughts that were floating through his head the phone rang. He snatched it up and seethed into it darkly," Hello?"

"Calm down" Alex sighed out on the other end," It's me"

"Yeah, that makes me feel so much better" Jake rolled his eyes, "What do you want?"

"We need to have an emergency meeting now" Alex said quickly," Get all the boys together"

"Sure" Jake's voice sarcastically cracked out," I'll summon them with the magic horn"

"I'm serious!" Alex snapped.

"What the hell for? It's 2 in the am, plus, I was sleeping"

"You were pondering the many meanings of life and thinking about Michael, don't lie. I know you too well" Alex paused," And I told you what you have to do"

"And I told you I'm not doing that"

"Look, whatever, we can delve into your emotional issues later on. The dean just called me, don't ask why at 2 am because I don't know. He wants to throw a ball for the school, to live school spirit supposedly, and they're sending the girls from Miss Lery's School of Etiquette to be our dance partners" Alex blew a hair out of his face," And he wants us to coordinate it for him"

"God" Jake sighed, running a hand through his hair," When is this?"

"December 2nd, two months away" Alex replied.

"Then why can't we get the rest of the committee to do it for us then?" Jake asked, confused.

"He said that we show the most school spirit and that he'll be checking on us every now and then to see our progress"

"Round up everyone then" Jake said as he hung up the phone on Alex.

He rolled over, picked up his shoe and threw at Remy, who was in the corner snoring and yelling out profanities as usual. He woke up with a start and glared at him," I swear I-"

Jake held up his hand," Save it, shut up and get dressed. We're having an emergency meeting and you will not screw this up for me" He rolled out of bed and pulled on his shirt, which he had left ironed on the chair the night before, a nasty little trait he picked up from Marco.

* * *

Marco tapped Ryan's shoulder and whispered," I'm sorry " into his ear.

"Not now Marco" Ryan moaned, throwing a pillow over his head and burying his face into the sheet," Go bother Michael"

"He's not here"

"What? What time is it?"

" 2 am" Marco shrugged," 2 am and the second kid that's in my custody is missing"

"Don't panic, where could he have gone?"

"He couldn't have gotten to Jake, do you think he got to Jake? Because if he got to Jake he'll be in the hospital all over again and if he's in the hospital all over again people will get suspicious and if people get suspicious then they might try and take him away from me, and that means Tilly too…and if Tilly goes…" Ryan threw a pillow at him," Shut up Marco, come on just…get the keys and we'll go look-" Ryan stopped, Marco was already out the door. Sighing he rolled out of bed and hit the floor.

* * *

**foreshadowing...it's another chapter, more reviews? **


	6. Andy, Youre A Star

**Thinsg are hectic as usual, but you know I love your reviews like woah and actaully I;m going to post a sneek preview into a future chapter, so I can just confuse you guys even more**

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**Chapter 6: Andy, You're A Star**

_On the field I remember you were incredibe _

_Hey shut up _

_Hey shut up_

_ Yeah…._

_Leave your number on your locker _

_And I'll give you a call _

_Hey shut up _

_Hey shut up Yeah…._

_

* * *

_

Andy sat on the steps of Brian's wonderful palace and thought dryly of how his parents abandoned him. How here he was, with really no specific aim in life( since he already achieved his goal of being as fabulous as possible) what was there left for him to do? He had no special talents. He had no knacks. No ideas. No dreams.

And more importantly he missed his best friend, Davis.

The one that shunned him as soon as the sacred coming out words left his pretty glossy lips.

The best friend that he shared years and years of secrets with, the one who he trusted and loved way too much for words. Yeah, Ryan and Pete and Brian were his best friends now, yeah, they were about as close as brothers, but it still wasn't the same. He just missed his best friend. And what was the problem with that?

And more importantly he was so agitated, at the fact that his father neglected him…so easily. Without even giving it a second though. That really hurt too, and how his mother so easily slipped along and agreed with him, of course she would. That's just how his mother was, she settled for everything, she didn't have a back bone in her body that didn't scream cunt.

His whole family, in his opinion, could go blow a cow.

He didn't really need them anyway.

He had things much, much much better. Like his health…and friends. And good grades, though he had his own…past issues that he needed to work out, he thought that he was doing pretty well. Well, well enough. And that was until he noticed someone running up Brian's lawn.

"Sammy"

* * *

"I knew you were pregnant" Brian stated as Andy came in carrying a kid in his arms," Though it's a little big for a new born, but I knew that you gays were magical"

"And it's your kid, congratulations" Andy snapped, dropping the kid down on the couch and frowning at them," What the hell are you doing here?" He snapped at the kid, making their eyes water up with tears.

"I came here because Davis is back in town…and I" They paused as Andy's frown got even darker, his eyes watered a little bit himself and he smirked suddenly, twistedly," Where?"

"He said for me not to tell you" They said innocently'" But you're still my friend so I came to see you"

"How'd you know I was here?"

"My friend Matt knows this boy named Jake-"

"Crazy Jake?" Brian asked in the corner of the room.

"Impossible" Pete said, who had his head in the fridge, looking for something, anything to eat

"Well Jake knows you I guess…"

"So possible" Brian smirked, tossing a piece of cheese at Pete, which hit him square in the eye. " You smell that Pete? It smells like you…stinkaaayyyy…like ass!" Brian cracked up laughing in the corner as Pete stuck his middle finger up at him.

"It does, take a bath Pete" Andy yelled from the couch.

"Damnit, I'm clean!"

"Like assssssssss" Brian continued on going, waving the cheese in the air.

"Then why does your cheese smell like ass then? You ass" Pete sighed out, heading up stairs.

"Someone's a little pissy cause they're stinky"

"Blow me!" Pete yelled.

"Already tried, you woke up" Brian murmured.

"Sammy, you shouldn't be here" Andy said, returning his focus to the kid in front of him.

"But I wanna have fun like we used to"

"Someone is a child molester"

"Someone needs to shut the hell up" Andy snapped, looking back at Sammy. "How is Davis?" He whispered.

Sammy leaned in," He's okay…Mina is taking care of him"

"Does he still have road rage?" Andy smiled, thinking back.

"No…it's Andy rage now" Sammy shrugged.

Andy's face fell," You need to go"

"I want to stay"

"You have to go"

"I wan-"

"Sammy" Andy said sternly." I can always see you another time"

Sammy nodded.

"Wait…does he know that you went all this way to visit me?" Andy asked.

"What?" Sammy shook his head," No, we moved next door"

Brian dropped the pack of cheese that he was holding to the floor, he was planning on throwing it on Pete while he was sleeping but he was laughing so hard from Andy's look on his face he forgot all about it. ( A/N: I had way too much fun writing this cheese scene)

* * *

"Michael?" Marco yelled, walking down the street.

Ryan was inside the car, driving besides him." Marco, it's been 2 hours. It's 4 in the morning. We have school tomorrow. And you have a test. And a paper due"

"Michael's more important" Marco said tiredly, running a hand through his hair.

"Taco, shit!" Ryan yelled out suddenly, swerving to the right and almost crashing into a post, but lucky the tree stopped him. "Not my car…not again…." Marco sighed, running over to Ryan," Are you okay?"

"Yeah" Ryan said, jitterly unbuckling his seat belt and falling out the door. He stuttered slightly, trying to say something. "Obviously you're not okay, look how shaken you are, let's just go home, you're right, what's the worse that could happen to Michael, right?"

"Ma- Marco" Ryan stuttered, biting his lip.

"Yeah, I just think-" Marco started as Ryan turned his head around so look at what he was looking,"-that we sh- holy shit!" He yelled, falling backwards into Ryan.

Michael was laying in the middle of the street bleeding.

And this time, he wasn't moving.

* * *

Pete woke up yelling as Brian screamed out in laughter, almost falling down the steps. " Oh…oh my god! Motherfucker! Why would you stick cheese in my hair! That's like the best part of me!" Pete yelled, Brian crying in the corner now, about to pee himself.

Andy came up the steps listening to Mike Jones," Back then, they didn't want me, Now I'm hot, they all on me" Andy sang along.

"He doesn't seemed phased about the whole Davis thing" Brian noticed, finally catching his breath.

"Nope, whenever he listens to rap music he's depressed. If he has Trapped in the closet parts 1-5 we're all goners." Pete sighed out.

"But Andy's a good singer"

"No, I meant crying. The crying comes afterwards" Pete pointed out.

"Please, Andy doesn't cry around us" Brian rolled his eyes.

"Fine…5….4…3…"

"Are you supposed to count down till when he starts crying comically and then the whole viewing audience applauds you or something? Because this is not Dawson's Creek" Brian said, sitting on the bed.

" No…2…I just know my best friend well" Pete replied," 1" He said, getting up and moved across the room.

Andy was still singing Mike Jones.

"See, I told you so" Brian smiled in victory.

"I wasn't done" Pete stated.

"Wh-"

"5 4321" Pete said quickly and as if on cue…

"I said before the ice was in my grill before I got my major deal these girls didn't give a damn-" Andy's eyes watered up.

"Oh…wow." Brian shook his head," You're right. He's crying really hard too"

"Sarcasm, asshole" Pete said," Please like I can really count down when Andy cried, I snap my fingers"

"Right…." Brian trialed off.

Pete snapped his fingers, and full on water works started up.

Just as he was about to rub it in the phone rang.

"Hello?" Brian asked, "Hey Marco what's up sexy-. What? When…where? What! No…no…how…is he….no…no…no, no I'm not faking being upset, wow….oh shit…umm…we'll be there. We'll be there!" He said, hanging up. He grabbed Andy by the wrist and pulled him up," Come on" He snapped at Pete," Michael's in the hospital again"

* * *

**There's the end of the chapter right there, but here's special sneaky of a new chapter I'm working on, cause I'm evil! **

** SNEAK PREVIEW:**

And he had been having the weirdest fucking hallucinations lately, him being battered and abused, instead of Michael, and that hurt almost as much as reality had, incept, it was better.

Because he had his Mikey.

His. Fucking. Mikey.

His love. His future husband.

You know, he thought as he collapsed into the toilet seat again, hair and everything, and pushed out every single fucking thing that he had in his body and he realized that when he was on these medications he was more fucking violent, depressed and cursed mentally so fucking much he would put Billie Joel and Tommy Lee to shame.

And he's so delusional that he even believes that Michael.

Still.

Loved.

HIM. He loved him. He loved him. He loved him. He loved him he love him…

So he threw up a little harder.


	7. Ohio Is for Lovers pt 1

**I can't reply to you guys individually and ironically enough, school hasn't started yet. It begins on Thursday, which is stupid, but whatever, I love all you guys like fuzzy bunnies and um, I dunno, would you guys hate me if I said that…mmm…I dunnooo -shrugs- I was writing…another part…to the story…like…another sequel…cause I know your going to hate this ending, and I want closure…we all want closure….hehe…yeah. So Azury, I am burningly sad for you, And burningly is a word, cause I made it up, and first your sick, now this, my condolences, I think that's the correct word for sadness…wait, fuck, I mean, I am extreamily sorry, there's nothing I can say that can justify what happened. I hope you are okay, and remember, depression is quite useful if you turn it into something positive.**

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**Chapter 7: Ohio Is for Lovers pt. 1**

_Hey there,  
I know it's hard to feel like I don't care at all.  
Where you are and how you feel.  
Put these lights off as these wheels keep rolling on and on. (and on and on and on)  
Slow things down or speed them up.  
You're running now for way too much. (and on and on and on)  
Or you are not gone._

_

* * *

_

Michael's eyes were closed, the white light concealing the corners of the room deafly, and the florescent light above his head was flickering on and off, the cold smell of death mingling with the metallic taste of blood that was swishing around in his mouth. His body ached so badly it made him cry just to swallow, and you could tell that he wasn't in any good shape nearly, salty tracks raced down his cheek in opposite directions, his body begging to be touched, held, caressed. Maybe that's why he was there.

Because he was so tired of fighting everything.

Because he just couldn't …let go as easily as Jake had.

That Jake was always in control

That Jake always had the upper hand.

That Jake was his keeper.

That no matter how many times he tried, and tired, and tired, and tired, no matter how far he distanced himself from Jake, they always found their way back to each other, by letter, by mail, by e-mail, if it was a way of communication, they would find each other.

So time

And time

And time again, there Michael would be, freshly abused and ripped and torn and used and worn down and emotionally bloody, and no one would even care. No one wanted him.  
And then, that all changed once Adrian came along.

What he loved about Adrian was that, he was almost as messed up as he was, mentally that is, and yet, he was able to keep himself steady. He heard a few stories about the notorious Nate, and the trouble and pain that he caused Adrian. How he wasn't looking for anything other than a good time, and how now Adrian had last heard that he was married with three kids…to a woman.

And what he loved about Adrian was that he never, never never never never never never, lied to him

Never hurt him

Always thought of Michael's needs before his own

Took care of him.

And lastly, said the most important words in the history of the human race and meant it.  
Michael dully curled his fist. Pain shot through his body like a rocket, so harshly and quickly that he jolted to the side for a second before sliding back into place.

He fucking meant it.

Do you know how many times Jake said those words to him?

How many empty promises and dreams he shattered?

How many cuts he caused?

How much damage he did?

He took the meaning of heartbreak to the newest level, because Michael would actually feel himself splitting in half, his body separating from his moral initials, what was right from wrong, the side that acted on impulse snaking it's way to the top and his old, soft broken down shell that he once resided in shrinking until it was out of existence. He could feel himself tensing now, his eyes snapping open in one swift move, his body breaking all over again.

But all he saw was white.

* * *

_"Addy?" Michael questioned, as he sat down on the couch to Adrian and smiled._

_"What do you want kid? I know that smile" Adrian said, also smiling, suspiciously._

_"Nothing actually" Michael sighed._

_"Right…"_

_"Incept…" Michael trailed off._

_"I knew it, what do you want?"_

_" A hug" Michael sighed out._

_Adrian looked at him," You're kidding me right"_

_"No" Michael shook his head," I just need a hug"_

* * *

_And I can't make it on my own.  
(And I can't make it on my own)  
Because my heart is in Ohio. So cut my wrists and black my eyes. (Cut my wrists and black my eyes)  
So I can fall asleep tonight and die.  
Because you kill me.  
You know you do, you kill me well.  
You like it too, and I can tell.  
You never stop until my final breath is gone._

_

* * *

_

"Why isn't he breathing?" Marco snapped.

"Please, it's all a matter of time. Until he can breathe on his own, we'll have this inserted down his throat, it'll allow him to breathe, okay?" The nurse said the words gently as the doctor pushed her aside to talk to Marco," And you're saying that you found him in the middle of the street like this?"

Marco nodded.

"And how exactly did he get out the house?"

"He snuck out" Ryan pushed into the conversation.

"At two in the am?"

"Maybe earlier, I don't know"

"And you didn't hear him?"

"Are you trying to imply that we did this to him!" Marco snapped at the doctor.

"I'm just trying to get my facts straight because the boy is either here for psychiatric or medical care every week" The doctor said rudely," And I know that you wouldn't be….neither of you would be doing this to him"

"Then why are you looking at us like that?" Ryan asked.

"Are you gay?"

"I am, why?" Marco asked.

"Just wondering…and Michael"

"Yeah…" Ryan stood up.

"Are you his boyfriend or his lover or whatever you gays call it these days?"

"You gays!" Marco snapped.

"I'm not gay" Ryan said calmly.

"He has HIV, do you think that it's the course of what's happening to him?"

"Of course he does" The doctor murmured.

"What? Are you saying just because he's gay he automatically has AIDS?" Ryan asked, shocked.

"We have a higher risk" Marco sighed out.

**(A/N: I so wanted to make this into a whole Brian Kinney "TAKE MY BLOOD MOTHERFUCKER!" scene like in eppy 510 on queer as folk, but this would have to do…)**

"No, this will probably make his condition worse"

"Well, what the hell is the matter with him?" Ryan asked.

"We don't know. This kid is profoundly…mentally….physically…disturbed, is the best way I can put it. I think we should evacuate out the room until we find out what's really going on" The doctor said as he turned around.

"That homophobic asshole" Marco sighed, " This is all Jake's fault"

"You bitch about my name even when I'm not there" Jake said as Marco turned around.  
Marco fell backwards again onto the floor," Jake…?"

Brian was on the floor down the hall laughing. The guy in the wheelchair crashed into him, and then he fell into the wall, which hit the door, which hit the emergency lock down button, which went into security mode which consisted of total and immediate shut down of the whole hospital. All that cages went down from the ceiling and the red lights and alarms came on. In the neon red glow as Andy yelled at Brian" You dumb ass!" Jake cocked his head to the side," Hello dad"

* * *

Cliff hanger and side note? Lyrics are everything to the story incase you all don't know. Lol, I love foreshadowing! 


	8. Ohio Is For Lovers pt 2

**Azury, Autum and tears, thankies for the reviews, I can't reply back, cause I am being stupidly busy with writing and fixting and editing and stuff, and preparing for school, cause I gotta look the hot for the boys. Lol, anyways, I am not shallow and or vain, but here is the next chapter, I'll have another one up tomorrow as well. Oh and flashbacks are gonna fuck with your mind  
**

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**Chapter 8: Ohio Is For Lovers pt 2**

_Spare me just three last words.  
"I love you" is all she heard.  
I'll wait for you, but I can't wait forever. x2 And I can't make it on my own.  
(And I can't make it on my own)  
Because my heart is in Ohio._

_

* * *

_

"Let me see him" Jake demanded, pushing past Ryan, who was standing in his way.

"Are you trying to kill him faster? You know that if…if he sees you, Jake, do you have any moral sense left in you?" Marco asked, agitated and confused.

"Enough to know that I know what I'm doing, Marco" He said the name coldly.

"How did you even know that he was here?" Ryan asked, still blocking him.

"It's all over the news" Jake shrugged," He's like the head story. So I decided that I needed to break the silence and see him"

"Jesus, the news? What channel?" Marco asked.

"What station?" Jake snorted," Try which digit. Channel 1-20 have it on, hell, he's even on MTV right now…they even have the BBC channel off for him. They have his picture too-"

"What? How?"

"Mikey has a dirty past, dad" Jake shook his head," And not everyone liked him"

"Don't use that voice with me, that "I know everything I do and say is not important" voice"

Jake smirked, blinking a little and sighing," You're right…" He began to walk away.

"Marco?" Ryan asked," Aren't you going to go after hi-" Ryan was cut off as Jake doubled back around and slid under from between his legs and made a dash for Michael's door, which at the moment, was left unoccupied.

"How come whenever your crazy son appears he always does this?" Ryan yelled as he ran after him, but just as he rounded the corner the doors to Michael's room swung shut.

* * *

"Hey Mikey" Jake said softly, sitting in the chair positioned next to the bed and smiled, that filling heart warning smile.

"Hi Jake" Michael said quietly.

* * *

"Open the door!" Marco snapped at the doctor.

"Your deranged son jammed the key!" He snapped at him," Do you raise all your kids crazy?"

"Do you raise all your kids…" Marco began when Andy covered his mouth," Excuse me, mister, sir, whatever, okay, how can we get to Michael?"

"Michael? Whose he?"

"The patient" Andy said dryly

"I have down here his name is Adrian Asher…" The doctor frowned.

Marco looked to the floor.

Ryan smacked a palm to his head.

Andy sighed.

"Look, " Brian said, stepping forward " Doctor Turner, I have a question…is there anyway what so ever for us to have access to the other side of that door?"

"Yeah, climb out the window and come around" He sighed, walking away," I'll go get security"

"Well, come on now" Brian said, pointing to the exit.

"I am not leaving him alone!" Marco yelled.

"You drama queen, we're going to climb out the window-"

"Are you crazy?" Pete asked, " You know how hi-"

"Hey hey hey, you two did the same thing when you had grand theft brat, okay? So just look at it that way" Brian said, walking towards the exit. Sighing reluctantly, the rest of them followed. As soon as the opened the door they were flood with news cameras and reporters.

* * *

_And I can't make it on my own._  
_(And I can't make it on my own)_  
_Because my heart is in Ohio. So cut my wrists and black my eyes. (Cut my wrists and black my eyes)_  
_So I can fall asleep tonite and die._  
_Because you kill me._  
_You know you do, you kill me well._  
_You like it too, and I can tell._  
_You never stop until my final breath is gone. You know you do, you kill me well._  
_You like it too, and I can tell._  
_You never stop until my final breath is gone._

_

* * *

_

"How are you?" Jake asked quietly, his voice ticking Michael's eyelashes.

"Fine…now that you're here" Michael whispered.

"I'm glad…you know Mikey" Jake said, taking his hand," I told you that we'd be back together, some day , some how."

Michael held onto his hand tightly," I know….I just remember nothing now…it's so…blank. You know?"

"Mikey, you're so weak" Jake sighed, running a hand through his hair," You look like Adrian"

Michael's eyes flickered.

_Adrian shook his head as Michael came over and sat next to him. His breath caught in the air as he lowered himself down and looked at the wall. "Maybe we should paint" His voice was calm….soft, softer than soft, a light whisper. Adrian cocked his head to the side," Why?" He asked._

_"Because I think it might look nice" Michael half slouched, he was suddenly too weak to shrug._

_"No, I meant why are you doing this?" Adrian asked, taking a deep breath before letting it out._

"Adrian?" Michael repeated.

"Oh…didn't you know?" Jake asked, his voice like a razor lullaby.

"No…" Michael shook his head.

"Don't you remember?" Jake asked, voice teasing

"No…" Michael murmured.

_"Ever wanted to be a dad?" Adrian asked with a small smile._

_"Oh…no, why?"_

_"Would you mind taking care of someone for me?"_

_"Who?"_

_"My daughter"_

_"You have a daughter!" Michael asked, shocked._

_"What?" Jake asked, shocked as well._

_"Yeah…Tilly, say hi to uncle Mikey for daddy" Adrian cooed into the phone._

_"Hi unkey Mikey" Tilly said cutely," Daddy doesn't look 'ood"_

_"Umm...don't mind her, I just miss you…and um…I can't see anything, cause I'm temporarily blind…and um…I love you, Mikey…so…uh…I'm gonna go now, because it sort of hurts to breathe…let alone talk, but maybe you can stop by some time, you know?" Adrian stopped shortly before hanging up the phone._

"Could you just tell me?" Michael asked, voice wavering.

Jake shook his head, getting up and pacing around the room," What do you remember?"

Michael looked up," You"

"Everything?" Jake questioned, his eyebrows raised up and a demeaning smirk playing out coyly on his lips.

_Dear Jakey,_

_I can't forgive you, for what you've done to me. To us. It's as if in that very moment you severed the ties that was our relationship. I lost all of my trust for you right there, how can I put my faith back into, into us again, only to have it shattered? I miss you too, there's nothing to life without a best friend to share it with. I have to move on, I guess. I will be watching you, as I always have and remember, you can always talk to me about Rory. I'm just not ready to talk to you face to face, so letters will have to fill your thirst for me for now. I just wish that I could trust you again._

_Love, Mikey_

"No…bits and pieces….letters..." Michael trailed off." Nothing much after that"

"Then why are you so uneasy around me then?" Jake asked, sitting down again.

"Something keeps telling me I can't trust you" Michael whispered, closing his eyes.

"You're right…you can't" Jake looked out the window," Do you remember how we met?"

"No…"

_As the casket was placed into the ground Marco observed the boy, Adrian, who Michael was completely in distress over. They did a good job for the 'funeral' actually, his skin had a wonderful glassy look to it, his black eyes were turned back to their normal blue and his hair, which was swept back away from his face, held a hint of winter in Marco's opinion. It was a light blue with streaks of black in it, almost like a winter sky in the evening._

"Sort of…"

_Jake swallowed slowly, his voice cracked and his body rigid._

_"My heart's racing" He whispered as Jake looked over at him, hardly moving from his head. His black hair, he dyed it black once he got there, a trick he learned from Michael, because he wanted a new look. It was cut so that it was up to his ears while his pink flushed cheeks focused on the ceiling above him and smiled a little bit," Of course, it should be"_

_He smiled at them," Michael"_

_"Jake" Michael smiled back._

_"It's odd that of all the things in life, all the pain, all the drama, all the love and all the hate we somehow maintain the most abusive heartbreaking coupling on this earth?" Jake asked, watching to air swirl around them._

_"No" Michael said with a slight gasp._

_"Why?"_

_"Why Can't we trust each other?" Michael asked breathily._

"Because Mikey" Jake said rolling his eyes," We hurt each other…"

"Hurt…each other?" Michael repeated.

"Wow…Mikey, you are messed up" Jake was by his side again," You know, a lot of people are trying to get me to stay away from you"

"Why?"

"Haven't you been listening to anything I've been saying?" Jake asked, some what agitated.

"Yeah…."

"So listen closely"

* * *

"Andy, get your butt out my face!" Pete snapped.

"Marco, move your leg out my eye!" Andy yelled

" Ryan, move your foot off my shoulder!" Marco yelled.

"Brian, get off my head!" Ryan yelled.

"Everybody shut the hell up!" Brian yelled," Do you want the coming over here with more cameras, nagging us and asking questions. We only have 5 more stories left"

"If I die from this I am coming back from the dead to just-" Pete started as a piece of cheese hit his face," Damnit, Brian!"

"Sorry!" Brian yelled from the top.

The boys were making their way across the trellis that was on the side of the hospital, go figure. Brian had genius lied to the press saying that Michael…AKA Adrian was being transferred to the hospital on the other side of town, it'd take a few good minutes before they'd realize that it was a lie and turn back around, but until then…

"Keep on climbing boys!" Brian called out.

* * *

_So cut my wrists and black my eyes,  
My final breath is gone,  
So I can fall asleep tonight And I can't make it on my own, (And I can't make it on my own)  
Because my heart is in Ohio. So cut my wrists and black my eyes. (Cut my wrists and black my eyes)  
So I can fall asleep tonight and die.  
Because you kill me.  
You know you do, you kill me well.  
You like it too, and I can tell.  
You never stop until my final breath is gone._

_

* * *

_

"A dancer" Michael sat up, interested. It was as if he was hanging on Jake's every word, which he was, due to the fact that it was natural reaction for whatever reason, and of course since he couldn't really remember….anything, incept for the occasional memory, which by the way was either traumatic or horrible or twisted or just plain out crazy, he seemed to be pretty fine. He didn't feel weighed down anymore.

He didn't feel tired

Actually, he felt alive.

"You are a good dancer" Jake nodded his head," You even have your own theme song"

"I do?" Michael asked, cocking his head to the side.

"Yeah…Michael"

"Yeah?"

"No, that's the name of the song. It's our favorite"

"Really?"

"Yep" Jake smiled," We stopped dancing to it after Rory died…."

"Rory…my best friend?"

"No…yes….Rory, my brother"

"Oh…I loved him"

Jake's eyes fell," I know you did. You know who else you loved?"

"You" Michael said quietly," I loved you"

Jake nodded," Will you ever forget me?"

"I can't" Michael whispered," I won't let myself…"

_"Just let me go" Jake whispered._

_"What?"_

_"Just let me go!" Jake snapped," If I'm some fucking burden just let me go then!"_

_"STOP MAKING IT ALL ABOUT FUCKING YOU! I can't! Don't you think I've tried…I've tried…I've tried so fucking hard…but I can't, you have me wrapped around your fingers ever so well…" Michael curled his fists at his sides until his knuckles turned white. "Why must we go through this over and over again. It's always the same old song and dance, Jake. We're always tripping up around each other. I only tired to come back into your life because I thought I finally forgave you, but I haven't. I…I hate you! I can't look into your eyes any more, I can't smile at you any more…it hurts just to be around you…"_

_Michael dropped to the floor," So please…just let me go to the bathroom and deal with it the …only way that I know how"_

"How could I forget you?" Michael asked.

"_Mi- Mi- Mic-hael?" Jake stuttered out weakly. " Pro-mise me- me that we- we'll always be to- gether…"_

_"We will be…" Michael whispered, snapping out of the memory," We made a pact, remember?"_

_Jake fell asleep with Michael cradling him in his arms._

"We made a promise to each other" Michael continued, sitting up, his voice becoming stronger. " We will always be together, Jake…but we never said that we'd enjoy it"

"It was supposedly implied in the fine print" Jake smirked

_"Kiss me like you mean it…like there was nothing wrong in the world, like nothing ever happened. Like we were still best friends. Like we still loved each other, please? Don't let it be a memory"_

" I was the fucking fine print" Michael snapped, leaning over the side of the bed. He picked up the lamp next to him and threw it at Jake, who ducked nimbly and watched as it went flying out the window.

* * *

"Oh crap, watch out…flying lamp" Brian said, leaning to the side.

Everybody else did so as well, but as soon as the lamp shattered on the floor the reporters swarmed over to where they were at.

"Christ" Andy breathed out," Are we close?"

"1 More floor" Brian cheered.

* * *

"You know, Mikey, abuse is not the way…"

Michael was wobbly standing now, trying to keep his footing before lunging at Jake, who was taken by surprise and tackled down to the floor. They landed side by side, Michael's hand automatically latching around Jake's neck, while Jake's hand automatically grabbed Michael's arms." Mikey," Jake gasped out," I didn't know you were so violent"

"I fucking loved you!" Michael yelled out, squeezing his nails into Jake's neck, he wanted him to die, he wanted him to bleed for him.

"And I do to"

"But I don't any more" Michael stopped for a second, kicking Jake in the stomach before punching him. He landed one in the eye and one in the jaw, the second one sent Jake crashing into the heater in the corner, where he quickly advanced on him. He smacked him clear across the face, one with the front of his hand, the second with the back of it, savoring the echo oh the slap around the room. Jake peeked up at him, smiling, lip bleeding. "You're a regular Adrian…"

Michael didn't miss a beat," And you're a regular Rory…"

Now that set Jake off," How dare you talk about him like that?" He said, darkly, his own hands clasping around Michael's neck as he punched him in the shoulder, making him fall backwards into the wall. He shoved him up against it and pushed his hands behind his back," The thing that I didn't like about Adrian was that he was too clingy…so fuzzy…"

"Don't blame me if everyone you love goes away , Jake!" Michael said, pushing off the wall and facing him, sweating, bleeding, and breath heavy. " I know you only push me away because you don't want me to leave you first"

A beat….

Jake backed Michael up against the wall.

His hand slipped down to the back of his hips.

He pulled them forward, pressing himself hard and flat up against Michael's face.

They breathed on each other.

"I'm not going anywhere" Michael whispered. He timidly reached his hands up to touch Jake's now black eye when Jake slapped his hand away. He then grasped it, placed his hand against his chest and looked Michael in the eye," Can you feel a heartbeat, Mikey? How many more do you think I have left?"

_"Words are fucking powerful" Michael said quickly." Sorry's and promises aren't keeping me alive any longer, you're not my Jakey from before, you're some…boy with bitter eyes and a knack for killing relationships and everyone else slowly. Look at Marco and Dylan…you see where that left them? All because of you…fuck, look at you and me, look at me Jakey" Michael yelled, pulling Jake's hand and pushing up against his chest. He could feel a dull heartbeat," Look…feel me, Jakey. How many more beats do you think I have left? You kill people, just like the way you killed Ror-" Michel's neck snapped to the side as a hand collided with his face, stinging like fire. When his eyes met Jake's he just simply wiped the blood of his lip, with his index finger and held it up to Jake. "Don't get too close" He snarled out fiercely," Or you might wanna receive a greater truth than what you can handle"_

Michael's breath hitched, he leaned in slowly, gently, until their lips were touching. He slowly spoke," 1…2….3…" He counted them off slowly, each time his heart would jump Michael would count another one," 4…5…6…" He stopped, kissed him softly," How many more Jakey?"

He could feel Jake's hands roaming down on his body, his hands sliding down his back, down his hips and resting at the back pocket of his jeans. His eyes watered. He brought his hips forward and fell limp into Jake's arms, as he always did.

"Jake?" Michael whispered.

Jake blinked at him, not moving.

"Why…why are we forced to love people who are destined to be our own demise?"

Jake stared at him, his eyes piercing into his." Because….people aren't forced to do that…they chose to. And we're not just anybody…"

"We're extraordinary" They both breathed out at the same time.

"You know…Mikey…no matter what I do…" Jake said softly, his breath tickling Michael's neck. He ran a single finger down the side of Michael's face, the same pale creamy cheeks sat there, flushed at the moment, and the same dull emerald colored eyes floated around. " I will….always…always…love you"

Michael blinked at him.

_While he mesmerized Michael, however, he slipped a note into his back pocket before letting him go._

_Was there something in his eyes? Reluctant? Afraid? Worried? Anger?_

_He couldn't tell._

_"I love you, Jake" Michael said as Jake continued to walk away._

Jake hugged him, wrapping his arms around his shoulders and pulling him in close. " I'm…" He stopped, he heard voices. " I'm sorry Micha-"

"I'm sorry Jake…"

"What? No…I should-"

"No…I…I can't…I won't do this…not again…" Michael whispered, backing out of the embrace.

"But I said I was sorry" Jake whispered, at a lost for words.

._" Sorry's and promises aren't keeping me alive any longer, you're not my Jakey from before, you're some…boy with bitter eyes and a knack for killing relationships and everyone else slowly…"_

They looked at each other.

"Step away from the boy!" The police yelled at the door, knocking it down.

"Michael?" Marco yelled, crashing in from the window. Pete, Ryan, Andy, Brian and the policemen all filled the room, but Michael and Jake stared at each other like they were both about to die.

"I'm sorry Jak-" Michael didn't finish his sentence.

Everything went white again

* * *

_You know you do, you kill me well._

_You like it too, and I can tell.  
You never stop until my final breath is gone_


	9. Dance Dance

**Okay, I have a question, hehehe, who would you like to see have sex and or kiss, just wondering? Ryan/ Pete? Ryan/ Marco? Marco/ Andy? Andy/ Brian? Jake/ Michael? Michael/ Robert? Jake/ Alex? Jake/ Remy? Lol, because I have to say about um…mmm….1 pair is about to…1 pair does, 1 pair will and 1 pair is. Lol. Love me. And I am like uber sorry my mouse is being a wanker and my dad had to get a new one, but I am up to chapter 25 and I swear, this story gets so craxy here you guys will explode. You think this chapter is big? Chapter 11-13 has sex like woah! I'm back! Yayaay:dances: And I'm updating back to back, You get an update:points: you get an update:points: lol, Oprah aint got shit on me**

**You finally find out Alex's secret. You finally know what happens. Chapters 11-13 will have you gasping for breath and not to tute my oh the horn, but chapter 20 and up will have you shocked, hell, I didn't even know you could put a twist, within TWIST, within a twist, but I'll give you a hint, like I said before, read the lyrics, they all mean something dark, and especially this on, by fall out boy,( woot wott Pete!) gives away chapter 11. Luvs like woah! Oh, especially the second verse, and if you read it and go "No…you didn't" I am nodding right now, because I did. I did and it rocked. Rocked like woah**

**

* * *

**

**Chapter 9: Dance Dance**

_She says she's no good _

_With words but I'm worse _

_Barely stuttered "A joke of a romantic"  
Or it just stuck to my tongue _

_Weighed down with words too over dramatic_

_ Tonight is "It cant get much worse"_

_Vs "No one should ever feel like…."_

_

* * *

_

"He didn't hurt me" Michael whispered, sitting down on the bed," Just get him away from me…please"

The officers blinked at Michael before turning to Jake, but he was already gone.

Marco sighed and walked over to Michael, with fear in his eyes," Do you want to see Jake again?"

"No…I think I'm cured" Michael smiled a little. " I think I'm okay"

Marco smiled but then frowned as Michael slowly fell backwards and hit the pillow. Doctor Turner pushed past Marco and pulled out his stethoscope and pressed it against his chest. He listened for a few minutes before looking at Michael's arm and glancing down," Where did that come from?"

There was a red mark over his wrist's vein.

* * *

"Alex, I'm sorry. Pick up the phone" Jake said quickly, breathlessly," Alex, please, I need someone to talk to…I did it, I did what you told me and now it's even worse. I don't feel any better, and now…I think, he can finally move on. I can't let him do that…Alex, pick up the fucking phone! I said I was sorry! I didn't mean to say that-" The answering machine clicked off.

He slammed the phone down to see Remy smirking in the corner at him.

"What the fuck are you smiling at?" Jake asked, venom leaking from his very lips.

"It's just amusing to see you in a sheer and utter state of panic" Remy shrugged, smiling wider.

Jake was very close to punching Remy himself but he stopped, he didn't need this.

He didn't deserve this!

He looked over at the phone and tilted his head to the side.

* * *

Why don't you show me some spine That you've been saving for his mattress I only want sympathy in the form of you Climbing into bed with me 

Michael picked up the phone, rubbing his wrist slightly and whispering into it," Hello Jake"

"How'd you know it was me?" Jake asked, shocked.

"I just know" Michael replied, his voice some what different.

Calm.

At peace.

"Well….aren't you going to hang up on me?" Jake asked worridly, glancing to the floor and hiding his eyes from Remy, who was gitting a major kick out of all of this.

"No…unlike you, Jakey, I can actually handle a real complication without…violence"

"I'll make it up to you" Jake said quickly.

"Make what up?"

"Everything" Jake stuttered out," I'll fix- fix everything for you"

"Oh that's nice, but I think that you should just stay away from me" Michael said, sitting up a little when he saw Robert coming into the room, holding a bowl of soup and pudding.

"Stay away?" Jake repeated," What?"

"Jakey…we're not married" Michael said a little chuckle in his voice," We're not being forced to be together"

"Yes, yes we are. We have to be together"

"You sound like me" Michael rolled his eyes.

"Well, I wish you'd take this more seriously! What kind of medication do they have you on?"

"Painkillers" Michael smiled.

Jake slapped his hand to his head," Figures, how many did you take?"

"Oh, I dunno…1...6, does it matter?" Michael smirked," All I know is that I've never felt better….felt happier…."

"More drugged up" Jake murmured.

"Huh?" Michael asked happily.

"I said I'm happy that you're happy"

"Yep, I haven't been this happy since the day that you left me!" Michael smiled again, adjusting the settings on his bed.

Jake's eyes fell," Really?"

"Never better, cause you see, I was just finally getting over the fact that you are the most selfish arrogant asshole to ever walk the earth and that all you care about was yourself, Rory and your dad and that I ultimately have no space in your heart until you finally realise that he's not coming back and that you will never ever see him again." Michael looked up at the ceiling," So Jakey I think I should go, Robby's bringing me pudding! And you know how much I love that"

"I'll make it up to you" Jake whispered as Michael hung up.

He looked at Remy again through slanted eyes and then looked at the pocket knife at the end of the dresser…

* * *

"Hey, there's the asshole that tired to out road rage me" Marco said, looking at the boy in front of him on the line in the store. He was arguing with some old woman at the counter.

Him, Ryan and Andy decided to go shopping for clothes since Halloween was almost there. Marco and Andy had decided to dress up as matching dance whores while Ryan decided on either dressing up as Justin from queer as folk ( which wouldn't be hard due to the fact that he was already A. gay, B. and artist and C. handsome as hell) or Donnie Darko. Marco inched up closer, momentarily dropping the pink glitter and mascara into Andy's hand and listening to the conversation between the two of them.

"This boy tried to sexually harass me!" The old woman cried.

"The hell I did!" The boy yelled," No one wants your bony ass lady, and besides, there's one tolken reason why I don't want her!"

"And that would be?" The cleck, cute aisle 6 guy asked, glancing over at Marco and winking at him.

"That…" They hesitated.

"Is there a problem here?" Marco asked, walking over to the boy and leaning on his shoulder casually.

"Hey, you're that asshole-" He began when Marco stepped on his foot," Quiet babe when I talk. Hey Shawn, what's the problem?"

The clerk, Shawn glanced at Marco and then at Ryan," Weren't you dating him last week?"

"I rotate boys" Marco shrugged," He's mines this week. And that lady thinks that everyone is molesting her!"

They turned around but the old woman was already gone, making off with the boy's food.

"Damn, my cookies" He muttered, eyes falling to the floor.

"Marco?" Shawn asked," I thought you said you were taking a break from dating…"

"I am" Marco smiled, he looked at the boy," Sorry babe, we're over. But hey, look at it this way, at least you didn't walk on us having pre sex together in a dorm room and then ultimately breaking up on me because I wasn't in the mood for a semi threesome relationship" He winked and threw an arm over Shawn's shoulder, "When do you get off?"

"Now" Shawn smirked, throwing his apron to the floor and guiding Marco out the store," You like Chinese?"

"Boy, do I ever" Marco said, mouthing over his shoulder at the boy," I am the better person" as he walked out.

Ryan blinked," How does he do that?"

Andy sighed," I don't know, but that guy looked hot. And now we have to pay for all of this"

* * *

"Jake, put the knife down" Remy said cautiously.

"Why?" Jake whispered," Why the hell should I?"

"Because…people love you, dumbass" Remy said, staring at the knife.

Jake had it positioned at the very tip of his neck, right under one of his veins. His eyes were red and teary and his stature was so rigid and boney, that it almost looked like some sort of coat rack. "Tell me why I can't do this…everybody's right, all I do is cause pain"

"So killing yourself is not the way…"

Jake snorted," Fuck you, Remy, you just don't want to be questioned when they find out that I'm dead."

"No" Remy shook his head," You amuse me!"

"Great, another person who enjoys my show"

"What?"

"Welcome to my own little conspiracy theory, Remy. My own little façade, something that I can control, like I really wanted to be this way…" Jake whispered, tears welling up." I didn't want to be like this!"

Alex opened the door," I got your message" His step faltered," What the fuck are you doing?"

"Hi Alex" Jake said, eyes to the floor again.

"Jake, put the knife down" Alex said, inching closer.

"You Don't understand what happened" Jake whispered.

"I've been through it…and worse, please, Jake, I need you, remember?"

"No….you don't need me" Jake shook his head," Nope, not at all. Alex, you don't need me"

"Jake…please…" Alex trailed off, getting closer until he was right next to him. He slowly reached up…

"Don't try that shit on me!" Jake snapped, pushing the knife slightly into his neck, he flinched." Stop tyring to save me!"

"You saved me!" Alex said, whispered, lost, his eyes watering," Jake, I owe you so much…"

"When I got there it was too late."

"I could've been dead…."

"I know…" Jake stopped.

"Jake…when I was raped….I felt horrible, as if my whole body was dirty, horrible, I wanted to die…and you helped me…so much…please, let me help you" Alex whispered," I turst you, trust me, please?"

Jake looked at Remy, who was shocked that the cocky Alex was raped and then back at Jake, who was shocked that he said all of that so openly. He dropped the knife and colasped into Alex's arms, crying until he couldn't breathe.

Alex just stood there holding him.


	10. Loretta Young Silks

**Don't let the title of this chapter fool you, this is one of the best songs I;ve ever heard in my life and I am practically obsessed with it. So enjoy please!**

**

* * *

**

**Chapter 10: Loretta Young Silks**

_Got answers for everyone, endless excuses _

_Not happy for anyone, cos I'm trying to break your click-track heart_

_ Seen a vision of perfect grace, airbrushed and lifeless _

_All contempt and aftertaste it's like I'm waiting for the scars to heal_

_

* * *

_

Alex pushed his books aside on the bed and threw his pencils and pens to the floor before colasping on the bed from tiredness. Jake kept him up all night, for a week straight, looking for consoling and help and he was just plainly fucked as usual. But Alex was trying to stay strong, because he knew that Remy, Jake's supposedly new protégé since Alex had passed his school with flying colors, would be on his back.

He should've never said it out loud, but Jake needed to hear that he wasn't the only one with problems at the current moment. And while Alex should be glad that he helped him out, he wasn't, because he knew that this was only a quick and simple answer to a problem that was no where being fixed. He rolled off the bed and looked around in his book bag and smiled when he found the little tiny red book at the bottom. Him and Jake kept all their important numbers in there ( they both had a separate set) but whatever one had, the other had as well. And everybody and their uncle at the school knew that no matter what happened, Michael was always a main priority at the moment.

No matter where they were.

So as Alex leafed through the book a smile crept onto his lips and he knew that this was the beginning of a brilliant plan.

* * *

"Come on Mikey" Robert cooed as Michael rolled his eyes. He was let out of the hospital due to the fact that…there wasn't anything wrong with him besides the minor cuts and brusises. Michael and Robert were currently lolling around their room, Michael on the carpet picking through Chinese food and Robert laying on the bed streached out, listening to techno music as usual. 

"I love this song" Robert sighed out," Come on Mikey" He said it again…

But Michael didn't flinch, instead he looked up and smiled," Yeah?"

"Come sing the song with me" Robert said, getting up and dancing around. " You know how much you want to"

Michael laughed," Nope, Robby, you go on and dance, I have to finish typing up that report"

"That one for social studies?"

"Yeah…I chose Oscar Wilde. Literary Genusis." Michael beamed.

Robert laughed as he continued dancing around," You know, Mikey, you look brand new"

"I just took a shower" Michael shrugged.

"No, I mean…different completely, like your whole aura has changed completely." Robert sighed," Don't you feel good?"

"Yeah, I guess" Michael looked at the floor and then back at Robert. Their room was so quiet these days, since Michael didn't exactly cry himself to sleep anymore he would just sit there for hours thinking about…everything, in his life. What he wanted to do. What he could do….since he was free.

And then the phone rang.

* * *

Marco looked at Andy, who looked at Pete, who looked at Ryan, who looked at Brian, who busted out laughing, spilling soda all over the place." I'm sorry" He breathed out, still doubled over," This is too funny" 

"This the best show on television!" Marco cried out frowning." It's better than My Almost Real But I have No Life Children"

"What?" Andy said," What show is this?"

"My sinful dirty show with inhuman incest passions!" Marco smiled out," You've got Tiger, the hot guy, and…habby, the creepy witch, and that kid, and the Rimmy kid, and babies and…people and witch craft"

"Sweet" Andy cooed out.

"Shh…it's back on"

"Taylor! OMG you're married, to my sister, that's really my brother because he had a sex change in Puerto Rico!" One of them cried on the floor and then got turned into a toad as Habby the witch appeared," Mew ga hahaha Rimmy bring out the hot dancing men so we can boogie down!"

Rimmy, the hunch back whale turned puppet. Clapped his hands and summon the hot dancing men appeared.

"I love this show" Andy sighed," Pass the popcorn and ice cream"

Marco eyed him suspiciously," What ice cream"

Ryan laughed nervously as he switched off the tv," Marco…oh…I um…"

"What?" He asked.

Pete looked at Ryan uneasily," You didn't tell him!"

"It slipped my mind!" Ryan snapped.

Brian," Is this drama or what?"

"Shut up!" They all snapped at him.

Andy sighed," Dylan…"

"He unmmm" Ryan stopped

Marco looked at him, " He what?"

"He's gone…"

* * *

_"T__rent?" Michael whispered, shoving him a little," Come on Trent, help me with Adrian"_

_Adrian sighed," Let him sleep Mikey, he's tired."_

_"But you're sick" Michael said tiredly, holding his hands together._

_Adrian smiled warmly, weakly," So? I have you to cheer me up and make me better!" He patted the bed," Come sit down next to me"_

_Michael walked over slowly and sat down next to him and sighed," Addy….this is horrible, what's with the cold? I mean, it's been going for like a few weeks now. Are you sure you don't have the flu or something? Because you look way past the whole 5 day cold phase."_

_Adrian looked down," Yeah, Michael, it's just a cold"_

_"Good, cause I can't loose you"_

_"I thought you didn't need me"_

_"No," Michael rolled his eyes," I need someone to take care of me"_

_Adrian blinked," And I do that"_

_"Well Addy, I haven't loved someone in a while like I love you, so yeah" Michael shrugged, leaning up against him and smiling warmly," My best friend, the hooker"_

_"Hey hey," Adrian frowned," That's professional hooker"_

_"Wharever-" Michael began when Adrian leaned in and kissed him._

_"Addy-….what…didn't you say….?" Michael stopped, confused._

_"I'm sorry…Michael, I mean, no, I mean…damnit…" Adrian stopped also, trying to talk._

_They staired at each other._

_Before either could say a word Michael was pinned down on the floor and some serious kissing was taking place._

_

* * *

_

_Soft focus for full appeal_

_ Pictured as flawless_

_ No context for self esteem_

_ I'd be pushed to give your love on that_

_ As far as the eye can see _

_Too much perfection_

_ Pure substance for wannabes_

_ Keeps you beating to a click track heart_

_

* * *

_

Michael blinked into the phone, his breath low. " How many weeks?"

Robert looked up as Michael smirked a little," Perfect" And hung up.

"Who was that?"

"Irony, perverson and closure" Michael sighed, getting up," Hey, Robby, do you have any glitter?"

_----------------------------------_

_"Michael, no stop" Adrian breathed out, pushing Michael away._

_"No, Adrian, every time we get so close…you push me away, what's wrong with me? Is it the way I look, or something-" Michael rambled on._

_"No,…." Adrian sighed._

_"Well then what the fuck is it then-?"_

_"I have HIV" Adrian whispered, turning away._

_Michael sat there in shock as Trent finally woke up and yawned out playfully," Hello lover…and Michael" He walked over and picked Adrian up and helped him back to the bed," You two have a quick roll in the hay?"_

_"Why didn't you tell me?" Michael whispered._

_"Because, I knew this would happen, I know I would end up falling in love with you!" Adrian snapped._

_Trent smiled wildly," You asshole! You never told me!"_

_Adrian sighed," Trent….Michael…come on…no please don't"_

_Michael looked down to the floor," I-- I uh…need….to…." He turned around a left without a jacket._

-----------------------------------------------------

Jake wandered around the room, checking things off the list and making sure everything was in tact for the extravagant ball that was coming. "Fucking dance" He murmured, in a sour mood," Fucking balloons and fucking girls and fucking punch…."

"Jake, are you in there?" Remy asked from behind the door.

"Fucking Remy…" Jake trailed off.

"I heard that" Remy said as he opened to door and walked into it before locking it behind him. He smiled again and Jake resisted the urge to drive his clip board into his head," What do you want? I'm busy…"

"Moping" Remy finished. " And I don't want anything from you, you vain asshole heart breaking no good lying twat" He sighed," I came to get my flute, because un-like others, I actually have a talent"

Jake blinked at him as Remy walked out the door," You know" He said, his voice cold and low," I know your secret too Remy, so don't fuck around with me and act like you have the upper hand…I always have the upper hand, remember that." He kicked the door shut behind him and went back to his inventory as Remy dropped his flute on the other side of the door, frozen in shock.

* * *

**The next chapter I swear will make you smile, gasp and fall over as soon as you read the title, if you know the song, you'll see what I mean**  



	11. Michael pt1

**This is the chapter that I have been waiting for, which I've been begging for to happen every since I started this story. And now it's here. Oh and this is based on the Remix from the oh so wonderful Simon Bookish. Oh of course it's the song from Franz Ferdinand :snuggles with Alex: SO…like, I have to say, pt1 and ot2 are like, my favorite chapters from this story and the last one!**

**

* * *

**

**Chapter 11: Michael pt. 1 Michael…  
**

_Oh…._

_Come and dance with me Michael…_

_Oh yeah…._

_

* * *

_

Halloween and Thanksgiving went by quickly and soon enough the winter dance was only one day away and of course Alex and Jake were freaking out, making sure that everything needed to be accounted for, that every rose, every bush, every table and every chair was in it's designated spot. And since the only thing that was really missing was the girls, they seemed to be doing pretty well. Not to say they weren't pissed, well Jake more so than Alex, at the fact that they had to dance with girls. Jake wanted a night of debauched fun and sexual over drive, wild hormones and heavy make-out sessions, not girly girls with limper wrists than Andy and snooty personalites.

"So whose the DJ?" Jake asked, running the list one last time.

"Umm….Scott is sick, caught that damn flu thing that's going around, so apparently I'm off the hook. I get to DJ" Alex had a wicked smile on his face," No priss miss for me"

"Stop gloating" Jake said, hitting him playfully with the clip board." Just help me move this table to the other side of the room, the balloons need to be higher in the air and what the hell is the glitter for?"

"Special orders, somebody wanted them to bring out the classic effect" Alex shrugged," The red and green and gold glitter stays, I'll take care of it"

"Okay, fine" Jake sighed, running a hand through his hair, his eyes blood shot red, " I think I might be coming down with that flu too…." He sneezed a little as he placed a hand to his head and moaned.

"Oh please" Alex said, laughing," Get your ass into gear and let's move that table so we can get to lunch, I have to get to Mr. Sahfer's room for my appointment and then I have chem class. Ughh…."

"Fine" Jake grumbled," Let's finish this"

* * *

Marco sat down at the lunch room table, the rain gently playing the world's smallest nature driven violin for him. He couldn't believe it, Dylan just left, without a word, and how did he find out? From Ryan, who read it in the newspaper no less, because apparently, Dylan needed more time with Randy than he did with him.

"Dude, what's the matter" Spinner asked, sitting down next to him," You look all…pouty and shit."

"Would you cut out that cursing?" Jimmy asked as he wheeled over to the table and sighed," You dumbass. Marco, what's up?"

"Dylan" Marco sighed," Why do I even bother going for a decent relationship? The percentage of gay kids at school is like….point zero, it was practically me and Dylan…"

"And Tom!" Jimmy added," And sometimes Spinner, It depends on the month-" He stopped when he got hit in the head with a Jell-O cup.

"Anyway, I don't think I should bother anyway….I mean, it's not like someone is going to come to me, I always come to them…even with Ryan….whose not even gay! Can you believe that? And how come I didn't see that coming? Was I so blind? God, I'm so dense…." Marco trailed off, slapping a hand to his head," Christ!"

" Hey man…don't get all bent out of shape…the dude is obviously kicking himself in the ass over losing you, no use in crying over spilt milk, you just have to move on" Spinner shrugged, carefully picking up his meat and trying desperately to figure out what the fuck it was made out of.

Marco smiled," Thanks Spin…" He looked up," Hey, Is that the new kid?" He pointed to the boy in the corner, dark hair over cloudy dark eyes and was slightly taller than Marco, maybe by an inch, you knew he was a rocker, obviously from the fitted Converse sneakers all the way down to the trade mark black nail polish.

"Hey you guys, I read this story about Black Nail Polish…." Spinner trailed off," It was fucking awesome"

"Still reading on those retarded internet websites where people post their stories?" Jimmy asked, shaking his head.

"Hey, PeoplePublishing dot net is a damn good site" Spinner defended. (Lol, I had to make fun of myself)

"And hello, I like write for a fucking on line newspaper" Marco pointed out.

"Hey, I'm just a black kid in a wheel chair, don't gang up on me" Jimmy said, poking his meat.

Marco glanced back at the new kid again, taking in his look further. His black Captain like jacket was a wrap around one that crossed at the waist and was embroidered with gold buttons and a deep black lace. He wore dark black pants, along with matching black cuff-links for each hand. His hair was tucked neatly at the sides behind his ears, although some of it was hiding his eyes, perfectly, may Marco add, and his eyes, which were lined perfectly with a mixture of midnight blue and sunrise black mascara topped off the outfit. Plus that and the dead like pale skin, but Marco always had a thing for that anyway.

"Cursing are we?" Ellie asked as she sat down next to Marco.

"Vampirea!" Spinner called out.

"Ellie!" Marco squealed, turning around and embracing her strongly," Where have you been? You missed so much and…oh…oh…." Marco tried to catch his breath.

"So you seen the new kid?" She asked, taking the meat of Spinner's plate and eating it.

"Gross" Spinner moaned, looking away.

"Yeah" Marco looked at him," Rather indie punk with an alternative nu-metal twist"

"Too bad he's rooting for your team, all the girls love him"

"What?" Marco did a double take," Noo…."

"Yeah, Davis RuSou " Ellie smiled," The most rock fabulous fag this side of Degrassi. Well, besides you of course" She said, kissing him on the cheek. " And you Spinner" Ellie winked, taking her finger and getting the excess grease from the meat up with her finger and licking it.

"I just lost my lunch" Jimmy said, pushing his tray away.

"Davis…" Marco squinted," Holy shit, that's the asshole that cut me off!"

* * *

_This is where I'll be _

_so heavenly_

_ So come and dance with me Michael…  
So sexy…I'm sexy…_

_So come and dance with me…._

_

* * *

_

Robert chewed on his pencil." Okay, who wrote the poem 'The Time Begins When We End The Day'?"

"Ashley Simmons" Michael sighed out, rolling around on the bed," One more day…."

"Until what?" Robert asked, looking up.

"Oh, there's this event at school tomorrow for people on the literary committee, a type of debate thing, you know?" Michael smiled," It'll be awesome."

"Maybe I should come to cheer you on then" Robert smiled out," Then we could celebrate by going for some Chinese or something"

"No, no Robby, totally not nessicary," He muttered, blushing." You have to finish up your paper, remember?"

"Ahhh….damn American Presidents" Robert sighed, closing the book and rolled to the side to adjust the lighting inside the room. He squinted as he reached into the draw and pulled out a present, wrapped in a bow and everything." Just a little gift…something Tilly might enjoy" He shrugged, handing it to Michael.

"Oh, how sweet Robby" Michael smiled, un-wrapping the box. He pulled out assorted colored paper before reaching to the bottom and finding a little box at the bottom. It was a black color with blue ribbons that wrapped around the latch with a heart locket. He unbuttoned one button from his shirt and took out the key and handed it to Michael, who was utterly shocked at the gesture. He smiled and turned the key inside the lock and gasped in surprise when a little carousel came out of it, rotating around in a circle and playing a gentle little melody. Inside there was a picture of Adrian tapped to the head of the box, along with tiny scrawls of poetry written around the edges.

"God…this is beautiful" Michael whispered, holding the box, close to tears.

"It's nothing really, um….Ryan got Pete to write the poetry inside of it…and I made the box and all, it's amazing what a little cross wiring can do" Robert trailed off as Michael hugged him tightly and breathed into his ear softly," Thank you so much…."

Robert smiled," Your welcome"

"Come on" Michael said suddenly, letting go and getting up. He held out his hand," Let's go give it to her"

Robert smiled back and took his hand," Okay"

* * *

"Okay, I just want to say is that whatever happens I love you guys very much" Ryan said, holding the envelope in his hands," And no telling Marco, I swear, I will accuse you of being one of those imitation homosexuals that pretend and claim their straight but still like boys"

Andy gasped," No!"

Brian laughed" Just open the damn envelope"

"Yeah" Pete sighed out," We can't wait any longer"

Ryan teared open the envelope and scanned it quickly, eyes intent on the words and then he frowned. He paused, looking up, cocked his head to the side and then smiled like crazy, " Oh my god, you guys, I passed the first course!" He jumped up and down," I passed it!"

They all joined in on the happiness and smiling and pats on the back. " So how many more left then?" Pete asked.

"Um…6"

Brian chocked on his soda," What?"

"Yeah, there's 7 levels to pass. Bat shit, I know but if it looks good…" Ryan trailed off

"That's all that matters" Andy said, slinging an arm around his shoulders.

* * *

On Saturday December 2 Jake woke up with a headache and a mind full of questions.

On Saturday December 2 Michael woke up with wide greens eyes and mind set on a mission

On Saturday December 2 Alex woke up with a sad smirk and a cold heart, but a vivid plan.

On Saturday December 2 Marco woke up with an idea and a craving for chocolate.

On Saturday December 2 Ryan woke up with an artistic epiphany and a wild dream

On Saturday December 2 Tilly woke up thinking about her father and crying loudly.

On Saturday December 2 a lot of things happened, each one changing the balance of the other's lives.

* * *

**Hehehehehe...next chapter will rule you like woah. I promise**


	12. Michael pt2

**I didn't want to reply to you guys because MEWHAHAHAH I updated like woah, and Now I won;t update until fir or sat...cause this cliffy will have drooling and gasping and crying and well...yeah...hehe, without further aduie...cause I can't spell, here it is...I present to you...the hottest chapter yet...besides chapter 13, which is HOTTER if possible. CHAPTER 12**

**

* * *

**

**Chapter 12 : Michael pt 2**

_Michael you're the boy with all leather hips _

_Sticky hair Sticky hips _

_Stubble on my sticky lips_

_ Michael you're the only one I ever want_

_Only one I ever want Beautiful boys on a beautiful dance floor _

_Michael your dancing like a beautiful dance whore_

_ Michael waiting on a silver platter now…  
And nothing matters now._

_

* * *

_

Alex laid down inside the bed, idly flipping through a magazine as Jake emerged from the closet wearing a tuxedo. He smiled when he turned around ," You look nice"

"God, I hate these things" Jake moaned out, looking at himself inside the mirror," It needs room to breathe"

"Well then" Alex said, smiling," Why don't we make some modifications to it"

" What do you mean?" Jake asked," Are you getting another one of your world class ideas?"

"As always, you're right. Let's make this a dance that everyone will remember, and if we happen to not show up with tuxedos then too bad, we own this school anyway" Alex looked the tux over," Get me some scissors"

* * *

It was around 9 pm when Michael proceeded to get dressed to go out. He picked his outfit carefully, sneaking in and out of Marco's closet and using the products that he borrowed for Andy carefully. He sat down in front of the mirror and questioned his look, how should his hair be? What about his eyes? He wanted this to be beyond perfect…

He paused.

Looked around, making sure the door was locked, before he flicked on the light above the mirror and glanced into it. His cheeks were pale, his eyes, which are always green, seemed to be lit, just a little bit, but other wise than that, he seemed dead. He picked up the light cream that sat next to it and rubbed it gently on his face, his fingers massaging the cream all over until it was evened out perfectly and then he walked over to the shower and turned it own.

He tossed off his shirt and jeans and hopped in, taking the shampoo and soap with him and smiled a little, thinking of how he used to get angry with his dad who would come and sneak in and flush the toilet as soon as he turned on the water. As he drew the soap across his body he realized how much he missed his dad, but he didn't want to dwell on the past. He lathered up the shampoo into his hands and scrubbed his hair furiously, black running through it along with blue steaks until it was all out and pooling around his feet.

He didn't really need to, didn't have to, but decided to do it anyway, and re-dyed his hair again, the same dark black and blue color before stepping out and wrapping a towel around his waist and going back into the other side of the bathroom and sitting down in front of the mirror again,. And blinked a little bit.

Because he knew that this was officially over, he blinked.

Because he knew that there were no more chances, he blinked.

And well, he was okay with that, which made him blink just a little bit harder than necessary

He toweled his hair dry, then shook his head vigorously for an after effect and then reached over and grabbed the make up, Andy's supposed "Circa 2005 dance whore special" consisting of only the most wild, flamboyant pinks, blues, blacks and purples, mixed hues of eyeliner, lip gloss, lip stick and nail polish. Rings, belt loops, chains, cuffs, bracelets, necklaces, and other assorted things. He sighed thankfully, he was glad he knew Andy.

He glanced around, so much to choose from, so much to choose from….he needed the perfect amount of sex appeal to make this work, all card on the table, all hands down. Everything at steak, nothing to loose, everything to gain. He felt his heart race, always a good thing in his opinion as he un screwed the cap of lip gloss and set off to work

* * *

Marco frowned as Ryan smiled," Cut it out will you?"

"No, not until you tell me what's wrong" Ryan poked him again.

Marco decided to go over to Brian's house after school along with Ryan for a boys night out. He decided to leave Michael be and just enjoy himself.

" Yeah, pretty boy, what's the matter?" Brian cooed out.

"The new kid at school is the asshole than almost out road raged me" Marco sighed.

" Almost? Please, he completely blew you out of the…" Ryan began.

Marco shot him a dirty look.

"…water." Ryan finished. " Heh…yeah…"

Andy laughed a little," You guys, Marco don't worry, is he cute though?"

"You know Sam Endicott right?" Marco asked.

"The fabulous dark brooding cutie that is at war with Brandon Flowers currently?" Andy asked.

"Yep" Marco smiled," That's him"

"So what's his name?" Pete asked, sitting up.

"Davis…Davis RuSou" Marco shrugged," New kid"

Andy's face paled," No…"

"Why, you know him?"

"Holy shit…no…you can….your lying" Andy stuttered out, actually looking afraid for once.

"Hey, Andy…what's the matter?" Brian asked, serious for once.

"He's….god….him…" Andy stopped," I need to go lay down…" He got up and began to walk up the stairs when Brian got up to follow him. Even though Brian joked around a lot, everyone knew that Brian really did Care for Andy as Andy did for him, it had always been that way. Ryan with Pete, Andy with Brian, that's the way they met, never dating really, just being close friends.

"Don't follow me" Andy snapped.

Brian blinked.

He tried again," I just need to be alone…okay?" Lightly whispered before continuing up the steps.

"Whose he?" Ryan asked.

"Remember his best friend that he was close with before he came out to him…?" Brian asked.

"That's him?" Marco asked, thoroughly shocked.

"Yeah" Pete nodded sadly.

"But he's gay!" Marco snapped.

"What?" Everyone looked at him.

* * *

Michael shook his hands inside his hair, making the perfect tussled spike look , cutting and trimming where necessary and licking his lips nervously, threw the scissors down before any past thoughts came into mind then reached up and pulled on his out fit. First he pulled on the skin tight leather pants, boot cut of course and then the dark blue midnight colored shirt, tinted with leather cuttings around the side, almost for the whole frayed jeans cut out type look and then decided on two black bangles for each arm.

Before he did that he zipped up his boots, something Marco had had stashed in the corner, knee length and then sighed again. He turned around in the mirror, adding the final touches of purple eyeliner, mixed in with smudged blue and black eyeliner, another coat of lip gloss, this time black picked up his bottle of nail polish, trying to decide between blue or black. He decided for a compromise and made blue and black stripes, vertically on each nail, for the whole effect. He felt silly dressing up, but like he said before, he needed closure, and closure is what he was going to get.

He pulled a scarf around his neck, silver of course, and then pulled on a long trench coat on top of that and a hat, since it was really that cold out side and then went down stairs.

"Your going to the debate?" Robert asked, popping up from the kitchen table, he was helping Mrs. Del Rossi make brownies.

"Yeah" Michael nodded, still walking.

Mrs. Del Rossi shot him a knowing look," Don't stay out too late"

Michael glanced at her nervously," I-- I won't"

"Good luck Mikey. I know you'll be great" Robert said, hugging him gently, friendly, but oh, how they both wished it meant more…

Wait, did they just secretly admit something?

Michael broke away quickly," Thanks"

* * *

- 

Jake smirked," Alex, your magical"

They both looked down at their altered tuxedos. The sleeves were cut out, the cuffs stayed of course, the bow tie separated so that it was tied around the neck and watched as Alex rummaged through the closet and pulled out two pairs of boots.

"Boots?" Jake asked," Are you trying to get us suspended?"

"Ahh Jake, have some fun" Alex pouted.

"Hell, I'm all for it" Jake said, snatching the boots. As he pulled them on he noticed the sad look on Alex's face," What's the matter?" He asked, concern leaking out accidentally, since he didn't want Alex to know that he was the only real person that he could trust in his life, that Michael was now just something of the past, a broken record playing over in his head, scratching and skipping constantly to the point of insanity. He wanted to point out that if Alex wasn't happy he couldn't sleep at night, because then he felt like he wasn't being a good enough friend, and that he was just ruining another person's life.

He was afraid to tell Alex all of this because he was afraid that Alex would expect more from him, need more from him, like Michael did. And when Jake would freak out, becoming up set and pushing him away too fast he didn't want to see Alex crumble away slowly, depression and hurt finally getting to him until he couldn't breathe correctly just at the sight of him, that his very presence would make him faint, make him cry, make him want to kill himself right then and there because of what happened. To know that in some twisted way, he was the cause of your own death, was just enough to make a single tear slip through Jake's eyes and hit the floor.

A single tear, hitting the ground. Making a soft patter sound.

And Alex heard it, from all the way across the room.

Because when you've been hidden in a closet for three days, crying, because the person that locked you in there is threatening to kill you if you don't stop crying and you learn how to silence your tears until they only made that dull patter sound. So he looked up and took Jake's hand reassuringly," I've told you before" His voice had a chuckle in it, an uneasy one, as if he might break out into tears at any given moment as well," I am…not…like Michael."

Jake sighed," Let's just get this over with, Mr. DJ"

Alex didn't let go of him, but inside pulled him into a hug," What the hell are you wearing?" He whispered in, taking in the scent.

"Axe" Jake whispered back, laughing and hugging him," Is it bad?"

"No" Alex let go of him," It's perfect."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Jake laughed, getting up.

"You'll probably woo someone off their feet tonight" Alex said, and he couldn't help the smile that broke through.

* * *

Andy sat inside his room quietly, crying when he felt someone sit down next to him and pet his hair," I thought I told you not to follow me" He sniffed out, rolling around to look that them.

"You know I was never one to listen to you" Brian laughed. " Are you okay?"

"Do I look it?" Andy snorted," I mean, I knew that Sammy said that they were back in town and all…" He trailed off.

" Come back downstairs, we need to go out and get drunk or something"

Andy's eyes lit up," Oh….can we play a game?"

"Sure…." Brian trailed off," You seem so happy, what? Scrabble? Tag? Hide and Seek?"

"No, silly….got any handcuffs?" Andy asked.

* * *

" Hello…everyone boys and girls, and I'd like to courgally welcome you all to the Winter Ball and I am sure you will all have a good time" Alex said from the stands in the top of their large ballroom, yeah, the school had a ballroom. Alex was in the rafters practically, and had a perfect over view of the whole place, so he could watch from a safe view. He had a turn table, although he didn't understand why since all he would be able to play classical music, well, that and one other thing, the mixed CD carefully hidden under the turn tables. He switched on some droning classical music and watched as Jake took a girl white gloved hand and proceeded to twirl her around in the fashion that was Leonardo Slpilce School For The Gifted And Talented. For all boys there were well mannored elegant young lads.

Of course 75 percent of the boys were gay.

20 were questioning and the rest were straight but didn't really care of the sudden advances and hit ons.

Jake rolled his eyes as so did most of the other boys as they twirled around together, doing the fox trot and all this other shit when what he really needed to do was rip off his shirt and bring on the glitter and fill this whole fucking place with techno music. He did get stares through, from his not so formal attire, but what the fuck ever, he owned that school and they all knew it. They respected Jake, they all loved him.

And that's all that mattered.

The dance went on for about an hour before things suddenly got a little interesting.

Around 10:30 the dean got sick from food poising and around 11:00 the lights began to flicker different colors, due to the faulty fixtures they had to shut those lights off and put on the back up stage lights, not the green , red, blue, purple and pink ones, just white ones.

At 11:15 the cd skipped twice, and Alex fumbled around, trying to fix it. At 11: 30 the microphone went wonky and you could hear someone say "Oh…" into it, as if out of breath, but Alex was the only one with the microphone, so he couldn't have done it. At 12:00 all the girls were tired, but the dance didn't end into 2 so they still had a few hours left. A few minutes after 12:01 an announcement came on," Sorry you guys after the technical difficulties, someone is coming to fix it" And then Alex went back to rummaging around in the cd casses. At 12: 05 the door opened, but no one knew what or who it was because the lights were out. Alex suddenly sprung up and grabbed the mike," Ladies…and gentlemen, um….I think that we should rotate partners now, and mix things up a bit…" He stopped," And let's put on a new song, shall we?"

He flipped the switch as people crossed the room.

The beat made them stop dead in their tracks.

The boys smirked, the girls gasped and Jake looked up into the stands at Alex, "What the fuck" Clearly written all over.

Guitars ripped through the air, the beat stronger as Alex turned the dial. The stage lights dimmed, the white ones transitioning into purple, blue and pink as the words flooded out.

_"Michael…"_

People followed the lights as they rested on the door, Michael standing there, his hands on his hips in a dull manner, scanning the crowd looking for Jake.

_"Oh…"_

He spotted him

Jake wanted to die.

Michael automatically caught the 75 percent of the boys, the other 20 percent glanced shyly and the rest even looked, only out of question.

_"Come and dance with me Michael…"_

Michael locked eyes with Jake.

Everyone looked at him.

Michael threw his coat and hat down at the front of the door and made his way over to Jake, looking around, the dull look on his face fixed in place, leather sliding across his legs, eyeliner and nail polish glittering. He came nose to nose with Jake, who was in shock and slipped the scarf around Jake's waist and pulled him in close.

_"Oh yeah…."_

"Now everybody, grab who you really want to dance with" Alex called over the speaker.

Boys and boys automatically sectioned off, Girls grabbed the boys they wanted and some just grabbed Two girls for themselves.

"What are you doing here?" Jake asked as Michael moved slowly to the beat, waiting for the words to pick up.

He shrugged," Dance" The words slid off his lips, whispered perfectly, darkly, seductively, the lipgloss shimmering darkly in Jake's eyes. " I want you to dance…" He whispered softly, purring into his ear," like you never danced before…" The beat picked up quickly," I want you to dance with me now, Jake" He growled out.

Jake gasped, Michael grabbed him by the fly of his pants and pulled him to the middle of the dance floor.

Alex craftily shifted the pink and blue lights onto them, while the orange, red and purple lights scattered around at almost seizure inducing rates. He smirked, placed his hands behind his back and leaned back inside the chair smiling

* * *

"Where are you going, Robert?" Mrs. Del Rossi asked as Robert suffered the last brownie into his mouth,"OH…I wanna go cheer Mikey on, you know?" He slid off the chair," Thanks for the brownies!"

"Oh, no need to thank me" Mrs. Del Rossi smiled sweetly. " You helped make them."

"I'll be back soon": Robert said, heading out the door when Mrs. Del Rossi stopped him. " Robert, don't be upset…when things don't come out as you expected…."

"What do you mean?" He paused in the doorway.

"I'm just saying in general life" She shrugged.

"Oh…kay, I will, Bye!" He called out, shutting the door.

Mrs. Del Rossi sighed and placed a palm to her head," Michael…"

* * *

_This is where I'll be so heavenly so come and dance with me Michael_….

Jake couldn't handle the pressure that Michael was applying, the rhymathic beat surging through his body as Michael moved next to him, on him, griding himself into him, the leather touched Jake's bare arms, making him go crazy. How many nights had he dreamed of this happening before? " You can touch me" Michael whispered lowly, another smooth contact," I won't hurt you" He took his hands, slowly sliding them across his bare skin and down to his hips. " Much…"

_So sexy…I'm sexy…_

Michael ran his hands acorss Jake's chest and smiled as he tried to pull away, only making him pull back harder," Jake, you know, since you left things have changed, everybody seems, different I guess" He used his normal weak voice," I missed you so much" He whispered, tracing his jaw line," At first…and then I forgot everything…Novocain for the brain" He whispered. He breathed a little, he could feel Jake's body tensing, so he continued on," I was so scared…"

_So come and dance with me Michael _

_So sexy_

_ I'm sexy_

_ Some come and dance with me Michael _

_So close now _

_So close now _

_So come and dance with me…_

_Michael you're the boy with all leather hips Sticky hair Sticky hips Stubble on my sticky lips_

"Michael, stop it" Jake said, trying to pull away again.

_Michael you're the only one I ever want _

_Only one I ever want_

_ Beautiful boys on a beautiful dance floor _

_Michael your dancing like a beautiful whore _

_Michael waiting on a silver platter nowww….oh…._

"But then you know what?" Michael whispered on, " I felt so much better…." He paused, his voice switching back," You look so good tonight…" His hands travled downwards to his fly again, " Have the boys been giving you a run for your money?"

_This is what I am _

_I am a man_

_ So come and dance with me Michael_

_OH_

_So strong now…  
It's strong now_

Michael leaned in," oh god…you smell so…good, is that axe? I love a boy in axe…" He whispered against his cheek, making a wet gloss spot there.

_So come and dance with me Michael_

_ I'm all that you see_

_ You want to see_

_ So come and dance with me _

_Michael_

_ So close now…_

_So…close…now.._

"Why are you acting like this…why are you acting so slutty?" Jake asked, horrified and extreamily turned on.

_Oh…oh…oh…_

He felt sick.

"How else do you think I got my money? Turned tricks?" Michael said, his voice soft." It was by…" He said, kissing Jake's earlobe, sucking on it," doing…" He moved to his lips, " This…" He kissed him, grabbed him and Alex struggled to follow them with the lights as Michael rammed Jake up against the wall.He pushed him upwards and smiled," Cause I'm a dirty boy, remember?" Michael laughed bitterly," No one wants an HIV infected boy friend, right?"

"This isn't what it's about and you know it" Jake snapped. Michael just pressed himself harder against Jake, his voice desperate and sick. His finger nails dug into his skin, sharply, making Jake's eyes tear up, as if if he was to let go Michael might die right there.

"Fuck…me" Michael breathed out.

Jake blinked at him.

The CD skipped.

_Oh…oh…oh…oih…oh…._

_Michael…oh….Michael…ugh….oh…_

_Michael…oh…oh…oh…_

Alex kicked it.

_Michael…oh…._

_Micahel you're the only want_

_ Only one I ever want_

_ Beautiful boys on a beautiful dance floor _

_Michael, you're dancing like a beautiful dance whore_

_ Miichael waiting on a silber platter now…_

_And nothing matters now oh…._

" I want you, right now" Michael breathed, looking him in the eyes," God…I could blow you right now" He placed his hands up against his pants and Jake flinched at the friction.

_Michael…_

_I'm…._

Jake's eyes flashed darkly, if Michael wanted to be like this, why resit it?

He gabbed him by the hair and pulled his face up nex to his.

Michael smiled wildly.

_Mi- Mi- Mi-Micahel…_

_Oh…_

_Michael, oh…uh Michael, ugh…  
Michael,..ugh…_

Michael grabbed Jake this time, and kissed him wildly, a dark frenzy over taking them, backs pressed against the wall, stutters and shivvers erupting, gloss being smeared in the most secretive places. He smiled, kissing him again as Jake felt his knees go week," You're so beautiful, Jake" Michael whispered gently.

_Michael…Michael…Michael! Michael…_

_Oh yeah…_

"I knew one day, that this would happen" Jake moaned out.

The pulsating music took over.

* * *

Robert stopped around the corner to get some flowers for Michael, as a celebration for the debate before he went to the school only to find the doors locked. That was rather odd, cause Michael had said that the debate was around 10 or so, so why wasn't the doors opened? Someone probably locked them, he decided, as he walked around to the enterance, but those doors were locked also, and a matter of fact, the lights were out too.

He stood there, confused, maybe he miseard Michael, but that's impossible.

Right?

* * *

_Michael you're the only one I ever want _

_Only one I ever want _

_Only one I ever want _

_Beautyiful boys on a beauty dance floor_

_ Michael your dancing like a beautiful dance whore_

_ Michael waiting on a silver platter now _

_And nothing matter now_

"What dorm room are you in?" Michael asked, clutching to him as if drunk out of his mind, it was 2 am and everybody was scrambling around to make sure that there was no trace of the sudden transition that happened while the dean was throwing up inside the bathroom for the past three hours.

"It's down the hall" Jake said, running a hand through his spiky hair.

" Then why are we still here?" Michael eyes, eyes glowing, they were still on the table, dancing, kissing, fondling away.

_Michael…_

_Michael…_

_Michael…_

_Yes, I'm here…_

" I don't know" Jake sighed, he got off of the table and slid to the floor, Michael behind him.

The smell of Axe drove Michael crazy.

The smell of leather drove Jake insane.

_Michael…_

_Yeah?_

_Michael…_

"Then let's go then" Michael smiled.

_Yes, I'm here_

Jake looked up at Alex who smiled, and waved at him before ducking under the turn table to fix the wiring. All night Alex had set up everything, the technical difficulties and lights, even the food poisoning, none the less, he just didn't want Jake sad.

_Michael, Oh…_

_Michael.  
So sexy…_

Michael slid across the floor, holding Jake by his hips as they walked towards the dorm rooms

_Oh your sexy_

_

* * *

_

**If you didn't like this chapter I will give you a full back money garuentee! Lol, okay, maybe not, but come one, cliff hanger like woah and hot leather action**


	13. Of All The Gin Joints In The World

**Okay, I lied again! Woot, I am updating! Again! Because I am a whore for reviews. SO anwyays, you find out how Michael got kicked out of Jake's house in the first place, you'll hate Remy, feel bad for Robert and be shocked at the ending like woah. BTW This is the final chapter.**

**Lol, no it's not.**

**Or is it?**

**

* * *

**

**Chapter 13: Of All The Gin Joints In The World.**

_You only hold me up like this_

_ Cause you don't know who I really am_

_ Sometimes I just want to know what it's like to be you_

_

* * *

_

The dean smiled up at Alex," Wonderful job Alex" He patted him on the shoulders," All the girls said that the party went swimmingly"

"Oh, well that's why you chose me" Alex smiled, wiping some of the glitter off of his shoulder.

"Actually I'd like to thank both of you, where's that friend of yours, Jake?" The dean asked, searching around the room.

Alex paused," Um…he's busy at the moment, trying to fix up some…past issues, you know?"

The dean smiled," Ahh…he took one of the ladies back to his room eh?"

"Yeah…" Alex shrugged," Something like that"

* * *

Marco sighed as he laid down on the pillow on the floor of Brian's living room. He wiped the drool from his mouth, rubbed his eyes and looked up and screamed." Oh my god…!" He yelled, falling back down.

"What?" Brian yelled from on top of the couch and then even he got scared and fell off of it.

"Why the hell is everybody screaming?" Ryan snapped, waking up fully.

Pete sighed, rubbing his eyes tiredly and yawned," Yeah"

"Look at the TV screen" Andy pointed out, an amused look on his face.

They all glanced towards the TV screen to see Jake and Michael.

* * *

Remy smirked, watching with his hands behind his back, at his TV screen, as every other boy inside the dorm was doing at the moment, and matter of fact, Marco and all his little friends were too. It was a simple little act really, Jake threatened him, so he had to fight back, right? It was simple really, since Matt was friendly with Sammy it wasn't that hard for the little kid to get inside of Brian's house. He lied and told him it was a game, and when Sammy got caught on Brian's lawn, he wasn't initially looking for Andy, he didn't even know that he would be there, he was hooking up the wire to the TV in the back, and slipped in a small live feedback signal, which would be initiated when Remy pressed the little on button.

Simple fun.

But oh, it got better, all he had to go was slip past Alex while he was cleaning up, that little bastard and switch a few wires around to get every boy's dorm room TV to have the same feedback signal, and they were all having a live showing from Jake's room. Oh course, Remy was inside the room with Jake and Michael, they'd never know, but he had his own tiny camera, in his hands, recording the whole thing from the closet. Oh the irony, bringing new terms to Fall Out Boy's lyrics of "Oh, don't mind me I'm watching you two from the closet, wishing to be the friction in your jeans"

He laughed a little, as the whole school watched on.

* * *

Alex laid inside his bed, the TV channels not moving, all of them showing the same picture, Michael and Jake.

Channel 1 : Michael and Jake

Channel 2: Michael and Jake

Channel 3-56 : Michael and Jake…

He sighed, he knew Remy was up to this, but he decided he had done enough for Jake for tonight. So he turned up the volume to hear what they were saying.

" So…why are you really here?" Jake whispered…

* * *

_  
_

_We're making out in crashed cars_

_ We're slipping through all the memories_

_ I used to waste my time dreaming of being alive_

_ Now I only wish of dreaming of you_

* * *

Jake sat down on his bed, Michael next to him, looking a stunning combination of "Oh-My-God-Please-I-Need-Help-Opps-I-Lied-Please-I-Need-

You-Like-A-Crack-Addict-Needs-A-Good-Hit-Desperate" and "This-Is-Everything-You've-Ever-Wanted-Yet-Never-Dared-To-Dream-About"

Lowered his eyes to the floor, looking into the carpet and squinting before whispering," So…why are you really here?"

"Isn't it obvious?" Michael asked, not moving, but instead smoothing his lips together, making a smacking sound and laying out across the bed, he patted it gently," To talk…like the old times"

Jake fell down next to him," Really, why are you here?"

Remy focused the zoom in.

" Remember that time you cried after Mr. Nuts got ran over by a car and I tried to get you a new squirrel to talk with when we would go to the park?" Michael laughed," Or that time Rory got stuck in that tree?"

"Yeah, he was in there for like, a week" Jake smiled, looking at him intently," He cursed us out because he said we didn't jump high enough to knock him out of the branch"

"Even though he was 10 feet high up there" Michael added," Hey, remember the time that we went to Cherry Hill?"

" Ahhh…Cherry Hill" Jake smiled, " Good memories, the whole hay accident, when we got locked inside the barn that time-"

"Yeah, that was scary…there was that guy that was there with us and he kept-"

"Kept saying 'Hey there sonny, it will all be alright' and he had no teeth and then tha-"

"-cow, yeah, that cow had ending up giving birth and we were front row and center and then we found out that the old man was really-

"Rory's girlfriend's grandmother!" They laughed out and said at the same time.

"Oh god, forget the memories, where's the action" Remy asked, wondering if this was a good idea to begin with.

Jake laughed genuinely , " Yeah, Miss Kiki Chambers. But remember the last time we went to…"

"Our spot?" Michael breathed out," The one that Rory didn't know about?"

"Yeah" Jake nodded," The one, on the side of the hill, under that lake thing-"

"It used to take us an hour to swim there because we have to dive under the boulder and hold our breath for-"

"2 minutes and 37 seconds, we used to time each other, but it was the only place we could relax, it wasn't the same until that time we…"

"…had gotten in trouble…you have gotten in trouble with Angelina when you said you didn't like her current boyfriend…and we had left there for the night and we were afraid…"

"…because of the weird noises, so we stayed there for 2 weeks, and then it was raining, and you had tripped and cut your shoulder on the rock, and something got under your skin and you had this nasty rash there and you didn't want me to take you back because you said that then …"

"…the magic would be over, so I asked you to kiss it for me. And you did….and then I had said something stupid. Some ramble, cause you know I always rambled around you and then shut me up you had…"

"…kissed you" Jake finished off," Do you still have that cut?"

Michael unbuttoned his shirt and rolled down the shoulder part and pointed," Right there" He pointed to the little tan line in his skin," When we had came back we were in so much trouble…you got like…"

"10 spankings from him, and I was crying but then Rory had came and whispered to us later on that night…"

"…that he was going to kick our ass cause he was worried shitless about us being away so long and we just looked at each other and busted out laughing" They finished at the same time again.

"I missed the good old days" Jake sighed out.

"Oh, I have another one" Michael said, sitting up," What about the time you caused me to have a mental breakdown in the middle of the street, causing me to under go months of psychiatric therapy sessions and anti-depression pills and then how you showed up 3 months later at the hospital and then we just got even deeper into the incessant issues building up into a fateful December-"

Remy perked up, zooming in the camera again.

"Michael, stop" Jake snapped, sitting up.

"Oh, I wasn't done re-telling our memory, Jake!" Michael said, getting hyped up," On that December night when we met again…remember? That was today? Or how about when…oh I don't know, like 6 years ago when after Rory died you had said "I love you" for the first time and when I didn't respond you proceeded to beat the living shit out of me and kick me out of your house? Huh, huh?" He asked, poking Jake in the chest," Good times right, happy memories right?"

Jake glared at him.

* * *

" Holy shit, that's why they weren't talking" Marco pointed out, they were all huddled around the TV watching them argue, the lights off, all laying on pillows.

"Christ, Marco, dude, your kid…" Brian breathed out, turning up the volume.

"Yeah, I have to agree" Andy sighed out.

Pete rolled his eyes," Hello issues"

"I kind of though the whole finishing each-"

"Other's sentences were cute" Marco finished for Ryan.

They stared at them.

"Um…let's get back to my kid here" Marco said, pointing to the TV.

* * *

_  
_

_Turn off the lights and turn off the shyness _

_Cause all of this makes up for the silence_

_ And oh the way_

_ Your make up stains my pillow case_

_ Like I'll never be the same_

* * *

" Well maybe if you had just said I love you then we wouldn't be like this now!" Jake yelled at Michael, who suddenly looked deafly bored again.

"If you had treated me better instead of being your punching bag maybe I would have!" Michael yelled.

"You should have understood!"

"I did!"

"THEN WHY DIDN'T YOU LET ME GREIVE?"

"BECAUSE RORY WOULDN'T HAVE WANTED THAT! HE SAID TO CELEBRATE HIS DEATH, NOT MORUN IT, HE TOLD US TO LIVE OUT OUR LIVES FOR HIM!"

"Then why aren't we? Why aren't you with me?"

"Because…"

"Because what?" Jake snapped," Because your some fucking self destructive anti-depressant taking suicidal prostitute with a heart of gold, what the fuck it this, pretty woman?"

"I'm not your fucking brother!" Michael yelled at him.

The room got quiet.

"And your one to talk, you over grown sad excuse for 2 year old abused kid. That cliché is getting old, oh god, my daddy hit me, oh god, my life is so hard, waaa…waa…waa… wake the fuck up Jake, your no better than I am! You hurt people as a way of freedom, you push people away because you can't handle people loving you back, this is why we will never, ever, ever, be together, this is why you'll be alone, and one day, on your death bed, you're going to think back to this day and just murmur 'Fuck' because you'll be alone, cold and tired…" Michael paused to breathe," So fuck you!"

"Fuck you too! And have you ever stopped to think that you yourself weren't the walking cliché? Oh waa waa,…my best friend kicked me out of the house and my mom and dad committed suicide so now I have to become a prostitute and Oh my god, I have HIV and oh now…my best friend died and left me a daughter who…ohh…did you ever think of this, may have contracted the disease….?" Jake smiled," So why don't you shut the fuck up for a second and think"

"Son of a bitch!" Michael yelled, jumping on top of Jake," How dare you talk about my daughter like that-"

"She's not your daughter, asshole!" Jake yelled, making Michael even more furious.

"Just like you're not Marco's real son!" Michael yelled, rolling off the bed with Jake to the floor, pulling hair, punching anywhere with flesh, clawing scratching, biting, yelling.

* * *

"Oh….damn" Brian breathed," Harsh"

"I can't believe he just said that" Marco sighed.

"It's true" Ryan shrugged.

"I was talking about Jake" Marco murmured.

Pete frowned," Wow…I'm so glad we don't have lives like this…"

Several murmurs of "Dumbass" were heard across the room

* * *

Remy flicked another switch and smiled when the screen lit up.

* * *

Robert and Mrs. Del Rossi sat inside the basement, Robert rocking Tilly back and forth and Mrs. Del Rossi holding Mark and Mike when the TV flickered before a blurry picture came into view.

"What's happening to the TV?" Robert asked, confused.

"Maybe, we're getting that new Logo channel" Mrs. Del Rossi smirked.

Robert started at her as she shrugged," What, I love gay cinema"

"Something's coming in" Robert pointed as the TV screen cleared to see Michael and Jake fighting on the floor. Mrs. Del Rossi placed a hand to her heart," Oh…Mio dio"

"What the hell is this?" Robert asked. He looked down at Tilly and covered her ears," What the fuck is this!"

He un covered them as Michael and Jake continued on.

* * *

_You only hold me up like this _

_Cause you don't know who I really am_

_ I used to waste my time on _

_Waste my time on _

_Waste my time…  
Now I only wish of dreaming of you_

* * *

" Just admit it, Jake!" Michael seethed into his ear, his hair now covered in sweat and plastered to his forehead, giving Jake a severe flashback of the time Michael showed up at the bus terminal in the rain cut up and broken, " You're just as messed up as me"

"I know" Jake cried out, shoving Michael off of him and getting up and walking over to the dresser.

Michael paused and looked at him," Then just say sorry so we don't have to keep tracking each other down and following each other. Aren't you tired of running?"

"No" Jake laughed out, a sick laugh," I was never running. You did. You started all of this!"

"No, Jake, you did" Michael gasped," What the hell is wrong with you? Have you no conception of what you've been doing?"

"Maybe I just like hurting people" Jake smiled.

Michael blinked at him, tilted his head to the side, oh god, the urge was coming back, flooding into him rapidly, he needed something sharp, anything sharp, but he wouldn't. he couldn't…no…not…he had to stay strong…for Tilly and Trent and Adrian….and Marco…and Jake. Instead he cried, long and hard, lowering himself to the floor slowly and wrapping his arms around his chest, the mascara tracks bleeding down his skin in tiny rows of red, black, blue and purple, making it look like he had been beaten up all over again.

Jake flinched, the way he looked when Jake had first hit him…

* * *

_"I can't believe it…no…no" Michael stuttered as he fell into Jake's arms," When, how…he was….oh god…no" He cried long and hard into his arms as Jake murmured," Poison…and something else"_

_They sat on the floor, looking at Rory's body._

_Kyle had never returned back home yet, and it wouldn't be until the next day he called 911._

_"We have to get out of here" Michael whispered, clutching fabric between his fingers and pulling._

_"I know" Jake nodded," I don't us to be like this…"_

_"No, we'll never be like this" Michael shook his head," You know that this will never happen"_

_"We can't live forever"_

_"But we're not dead yet" Michael countered. Getting up, he was about to leave the room when Jake grabbed his arm and pulled him into his lap," I love you" He breathed out, a whisper, eyes closed, and leaned into kiss Michael when he blinked in surprise, not hearing a response._

_No, 'I love you' back._

_He opened his eyes, Michael looking at him," You don't love me?"_

_"I…" Michael trailed off._

_"You don't, do you?" Jake asked, eyes red and tearing up._

_"No, it's just that…Jake…what are you doing?" Michael stuttered as Jake yanked him up by his arm and punched him in the stomach._

_"I'd give anything for you, to be with you, I give you everything that I can, I let you stay here….and you still don't love me?" Jake cried, lashing out._

_Michael began to back away," You don't need to buy my love…I do…I do….love you…"_

_"You're saying that now because you feel bad for me!" Jake yelled, eyes frantic, looking for something to hit Michael with. His eyes settled on the baseball bat that he and Rory used to play with and picked it up," I thought you were different Mikey!"_

_"I am different!" Michael yelled," Jake…put that down…"_

_Jake swung, but Michael ducked and tumbled out of the room into the hall way._

_Jake followed in pursuit," You're a liar and a shitty best friend, Mikey!" He screamed out, swinging again and this time hitting Michael in the eye, the same one as Adrian's, and sent him tumbling backwards until his back was pressed up against the banister of the stairwell. Michael held his eyes, already turning a nasty color of blue and black, blood trickling between clasped fingers and the look of hurt and horror crossed his face, he tried to run again, anywhere, because clearly Jake was loosing it, but Jake hit him in the back with the baseball bat, " If you loved me this would've never happened, Mikey! This is all your fault!"_

_Michael tripped and fell down the steps, no words escaped his lips, nothing to say. He caught his breath, sitting there at the bottom for a few minutes before getting up and getting the fuck out of there._

_Jake stood there, leaning against the banister with the baseball bat, crying. " Why the fuck hasn't someone called 911!" He yelled into the emptiness," My brother is dying…." He sobbed," My brother is dead"_

* * *

_I've got headaches and bad luck But they couldn't touch you No.  
I've got headaches and bad luck But they couldn't touch you No…  
I'm not trying, you only hold me up like this_

_

* * *

_

Jake broke.

"Don't cry Mikey" Jake whispered.

"I feel so….bad…" Michael gasped out, looking up, colors fading together," Look what's happened to you…"

Jake looked shattered.

"I'm still the same"

"You're not the kid that went with me to Cherry Hill…your not the boy that met me in the park…your not the boy who used to spit ice cubes with me at Rory when he was sleeping…you're something else now…something different."

Jake breathed in, his head feeling heavy, maybe there was something in those drinks…

"And I did love you back then, fuck it, I won't deny it, I love you now, but you and me…will…never…be" He said it slowly, eye lashes sticking together and throat dry. His skin burned for contact, something cool, something cold, icy. His lips, bleed blue and pink, dripped down slowly , mixed with tears of deception and defeat," So why don't you just kill me now?"

" I don't want to kill you" Jake whispered.

"Bullshit" Michael called. " You've been doing it for 11 years."

" I didn't mean to"

"Right" Michael laughed," Right Jake, because now is the time where I just fall back and pull you into my arms because everything is supposed to be alright …well it's not"

Jake stepped closer to him.

"Go on, hit me, finish me off, here , I'll help you" He picked up the pocket knife, the one that Jake had days before, and tossed it at him," Go on, slit my throat or something, cut my wrist,…oh here's a good one, why don't you cut out my heart?" Michael laughed and smiled and cried, " Come on, Jakey, please do it. Hurt me in the only way you know how"

"No…"

"I" Michael laughed out" I can't believe you! I cam't hurt myself! So now you don't' want to hurt me? Go on and fucking do it, Jake! Make us all better off! Besides, if you don't kill me you know the HIV will! Come on, we can be like Romero and Julliet, you and me…." Michael trailed of, tracing circles around his skin, " This was always my favorite arm…"

"Don't say that shit" Jake yelled at him, worried," Don't you dare hurt yourself!"

"That's your job" Michael snorted.

"Mike….I don't want to…"

"Yes, hurt me Jakey! Hurt me! Hurt me!" Michael screamed out, "It's the only thing your good at!"

Jake moved closer.

"Come on…"

Jake moved closer.

"Please"

Jake was inches from Michael as he raised up his hand, the one with his knife and brought it up to his neck, pressing into it, just like he had done with himself days before. He grabbed Michael's back, tipped him all the way backwards, leaning in close, lips barely…barely…barely…inches away from touching and he smiled that wicked smile that made Michael's heart break and race at the same time.

Because nothing with Michael and Jake is ordinary.

We all know that.

But incase you didn't their love is the whole shayaddi yaddi. The patented only copyrighted 2005 brand of "We-Hurt-Each-Other-To-Live-And-Yet-When-We're-Seperated-We're-Depressed-And-Our-Obsession-And-Sexual-Tension-Is-Something-UnNatural-And-Yet-In-The-End-Nothing-Matters-But-You-And-Me-I-Hate-You-I-Love-You-You-Kill-Me-I-Breathe-You-And-In-The-End-We-All-Die" Love. Yes, it's a lot to swallow.

Jake shoved him backwards onto the bed, climbed on top of him, knife in between his teeth, reached down, un zipped his pants, ripped off Michael's shirt and kissed him," There's more than one way to kill, Mikey" Jake breathed in as Michael pulled him closer, blinded and hurt, sour and sore, cut and empty, mascara rolled down their skin, passing lights flashed inside the bedroom window as Michael looked up, blankly, reached for his hair, grabbed his head down and whispered," Do it " Into his ear.

Jake nodded, slowly, easing down until his hand was on the zipper of the leather, touching it, almost there, un zipping it…

Michael smiled up at him, reaching forwards to try and unzip Jake's pants when Jake stopped him, eyes wide, shocked and afraid," I don't want to do this"

"Yes," Michael's voice sounded like a shot gun in the air," You do…you do, you want me so bad Jake, I can see It in your eyes, you'd die to have this moment, to have me" He arched his eyebrows at him and pulled him by the back of his neck and whispered out into the bridge of his neck, nipping it gently, hotly." You've always wanted to be in control of my body"

Jake didn't even bother to look shocked, Michael always have, and always will know him like the back of his cut and broken hands. " But" Michael smirked, sitting up, pulling Jake down instead, " You'd never think that I could control you Jake" He pushed one hand against Jake's bare chest and looked at him, Michael's hands were like fire, Jake was so cold and weak suddenly, it just didn't feel right. " And like I said before…" He suddenly grasped the fabrics of his shirt and glared at him,. " I want you to fuck me. Or kill me. It's either one of the two, decide now, or I'll decide it for you"

"You're kidding me"

"Does it look like it?"

Jake glanced at the table, where he had placed the knife before Michael shoved him down and held it in his hand, cautiously as Michael snorted and titled his head to the side," I see you've been having some times yourself" He glanced at the dried blood on the knife," You'd wait until Alex was out of the room before you'd do it" He smiled," Awww…my little boy is learning fast. You know, I always thought that pain was better than sex"

Michael pushed him up against the back head board of Jake's bed and sneered at him," I didn't want to use force" He looked around for something, anything and found duct tape placed next to the bed. From the closet Remy smiled because he knew that may have come in handy later on. Michael tapped Jake's arms to the head board. Took off his shirt fully and crawled over on the bed towards him, singing some stupid song to himself as Jake cried out," If you really love me, don't do this"

That made Michael stop. His green eyes flashed darkly, quickly, and while he looked Jake nudged the knife with his foot over to his arms and kicked it up in a quick motion, barely, but still catching it in his teeth. " And while you were thinking that" Michael murmured, shaking his head," You can't hold who I love against me" He moved closer," Even if it is you" Michael continued crawling closer until he was inches from his face, brushed the hair out of Jake's face and smiled, leaned in and kissed him. While Jake, who was stuck somewhere between passion, confusion and the utter feeling that something bad was about to happen, didn't think really as he wrapped his legs around Michael's waist, since well, his arms were fucking duct tapped to the head board and he had been dropped the knife out of his mouth, it was somewhere now…

Michael laughed a little bit, a boyish giggle as Jake's pull was stronger suddenly, and he was jerked forwards as Jake's whole legs were wrapped around him. There was another smile, it was short and quick and then Michael's expression just….diminished.

And then there was a gasp.

The knife was planted in Michael's side. He looked up shakily, blood coming out of his side quickly, some of it bubbling from his lips as Jake looked down in horror and stopped," No…no no no…Mi- Mi- Mikey..come on…Oh my god, I didn't mean to…I swear…why does….everyone I love die!" Jake cried out, frantic, pulling at the duct tape on his arms, trying to get to Michael. It took a few minutes before he ended up nipping through the damn things and then he pulled the knife out and took his bed sheet and wrapped it against his side, and pulled him into his arms," Oh god, Michael, I lo- love- Love you, plea- no…god…no…I can't loose you" He shook violently, wiping the sweat from his forehead and brushing locks away, Michael's dull eyes looked up at him and smiled, a stark memorizing smile. The green finally coming back into view, the startling green eyes that Jake first fell in love with.

"You finally did it" He gurgled out.

"No…" Jake whispered.

"You finally killed me"

* * *

_Turn off the lights and turn off the shyness _

_Cause all of this makes up for the silence_

_ And oh the way Your make up stains _

_Like I'll never be the same,_

_

* * *

_

**Like? Woah. Like. Review. Like. Drama. Like..NOW!**


	14. An Honest Mistake

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* * *

I just got the mouse to work so I am back. I am crying. because FRNAZ FERDINAND was taken of OF BLOODY NOKIA UNWIRED! But I am not trying to bitch at you guys, enjoy**

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* * *

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**Chapter 14: An Honest Mistake**

_People, they don't mean a thing to you _

_They move right through you- _

_just like your breath_

_ But sometimes I still think of you_

_ And I just wanted you to know…  
My old friend_

_I swear I never meant for this…_

_(An: dontn the lyrics always fit the chapter so perfectly) _

* * *

Panic.

Panic.

Marco covered his mouth. He stared at the TV.

Ryan closed his eyes.

Pete bowed his head.

Andy was crying.

Brian was in shock.

"No…impossible"

* * *

Panic.

Panic.

"Daddy?" Tilly asked, looking at the screen.

Mrs. Del Rossi got up quickly and left the room.

Robert sat there in shock, " No…"

* * *

Alex threw down the remote control and ran out into the hall way," Jake!" He screamed out, tripping over his own feet and running as fast as he could to the door.

All the boys spilled out of their dorm rooms and into the hall ways to crowd around Jake's door. Alex shoved through them, grabbing Scott's hand from the crowd, pulling him with him and yelling over the shouts "You saw?"

"The whole building did!" Scott cried out," Unbelievable"

"Move!" Alex yelled, getting to Jake's doors and opening it.

Jake sat there crying with Michael's eyes wide open.

"I didn't mean to" He kept whispering.

Alex stalked over to the closet and yanked open the door to find Remy there with the camera, fiddling around. Alex yanked him up and out of it" Do you have any idea-"

The dean stormed in," What the hell is going on!"

Remy flipped the switch off. " Nothing sir"

"I didn't mean to" Jake repeated again as sirens filled the air.

"Who called 911?"

"It doesn't matter" Alex said, " Come on"

The paramedics ran inside and pulled Michael onto a stretcher, along with Jake, Scott and Alex along for the ride. Remy stayed behind as all the boys were rushed back into their rooms to get dressed and then go inside the auditorium for an emergency school wide meeting.

* * *

Mrs. Del Rossi placed a hand on Robert's shoulders," Get your coat, come on"

"Where are we going?" He stuttered out.

"The hospital, I called 911" She said, "Bring Tilly too. I already called Marco, everyone else is on their way"

Robert coughed uneasily before grabbing Tilly and her coat and getting up and all but running towards the car. (** I just realized that there would be no one to watch Mark and Mike, but let's just say that Lizzy is old enough to do it)**

* * *

" Back again?" The doctor smirked at Marco, who was beyond ready to deck the fucker," What happened this time, another break down?"

" His boyfriend stabbed him in his fucking side!" Marco yelled at him," Now go and fix him the fuck up or I swear to god I will trash this motherfuck-" Ryan covered his mouth," Just go and help him!" He yelled.

Dr. Turner smugly turned away and gathered another doctor with him before turning off down the hall.

Ryan let Marco go as he turned around and buried his head into Ryan's chest and Ryan whispered into his ear," It's okay" He whispered, guiding him down into the seat next to Pete and Andy. Brian stood up, shaking his head," Poor Michael"

"Where's Jake?" Marco whispered.

"Over there" Pete pointed to the kid in the corner, hands curled through their hair, quiet and cold, closed off. Alex sat down on one side, Scott on the other, each of them holding his hand.

"I didn't mean to do it" Jake repeated," I didn't mean to…I loved him, I would never…god…"

"Shhh" Alex said, wiping his tears away," We know"

"Yeah…" Scott trailed off as he spotted Marco coming towards them, Ryan, Pete, Andy and Brian side by side. " Umm…here comes Marco" He said to Alex," What are we going to do?"

"I-" Alex stopped when Marco tried to pull Jake up into a sitting position but he just fell limp.

"Do you have any clue what you did?" Marco yelled," You killed him!"

"He's not dead yet" Jake whispered.

"Look at me…look at me!" Marco snapped, Jake's eyes slowly reaching his," Jake…I …god, what did I do? Where did I go wrong?" Marco cried out. " I love you Jake, but I swear to God, this is it, I can't handle this anymore…you need to go back…to Kyle."

"I loved him" Jake murmured, looking away." I didn't mean to"

Marco slapped him," This isn't about you!"

Jake's cheek stung sharply as he looked to the side," I loved him, Marco!" He cried, clinging onto him," Please…don't let me go…" He clung tighter as Marco pulled away," Alesso…"

Marco's eyes watered.

"Please, I need you…dad"

Ryan looked away and pulled Pete with him.

"We'll…go get something to eat" Andy said suddenly, taking Brian with him," You want anything?"

"Shouldn't we stay with Mar-" Brian began when Andy shot him a look " Umm…I'll go help"

"Scott why don't we go get something…anything.. I don't want to bother Jake and Marco" Alex said, getting up. Scott nodded and followed along so it was just Marco standing there, holding his son, both crying for everything.

* * *

_Don't look at me that way_

_ It was an honest Mistake_

Michael's eyes closed softly, slowly, perfectly aligned and together.

He was dreaming.

Blue and white clouds hovered above him, stark pink images and vivid blue lights. He smiled as someone tapped him on the shoulder. " Mikey" Jake called out, his childish voice full of happiness," Guess what? My mommy said I could have a birthday party, do you wanna come?"

"Okie, Jakey" Michael smiled, turning around. He was wearing a blue and black jumper with his curly black hair around his eyes. Jake laughed," Why do you wear your hair like that?"

"I dunno" Michael shrugged," I like it"

"Me too" Jake smiled.

They laid in the grass. Looking at the clouds.

"I see a train!" Michael called, pointing up.

"It looks like a monkey to me" Jake smiled," But yeah, it does look like a train" Jake handed Michael the apple juice box that he was drinking and watched as Michael finished off the rest," No fair Mikey!" Jake giggled, rolling over and tickling him," I want the rest!"

"You gave it to me" Michael stuck out his tongue, laughing as Jake tickled him, making the apple juice squirt out his nose. "Cool!" Jake called out. Michael rolled his eyes and went back to looking at the clouds," I see a coconut"

"I see a heart" Jake pointed.

"I see…Barney" Michael said.

"Where?"

"Right there" Michael pointed

"I see it!" Jake laughed again," This is fun! See Mikey, I made you forget all about your dad…" Jake trailed off, sighing.

Michael looked sad. " It's okay, I just miss him."

"I know…you can share my daddy with me and Rory if you want"

"What is this about sharing?" Rory asked as he sat down next to Michael," Are you two looking at clouds again"

"Yep" Michael nodded." Wanna join us?"

"I'll take a rain check, dad said to tell you two that the dinner's almost done" He got back up and ruffled their hair before walking away.

"I wanna stay here forever Jakey" Michael said, rubbing his sleepy eyes.

"We can…." Jake nodded," Let's do that"

"Okie" Michael nodded," We'll be together forever!"

"Yep" Jake nodded. " That one looks like a strawberry…."

* * *

_Sometimes, I forget I'm still awake _

_I fuck up and say these things out loud_

The doctors left the emergency room with blood covering them and Dr. Turner pulled off his mask as Jake and Marco walked up to them," So what is it?"

"Well…he doesn't have cancer" He laughed.

Jake was about to punch him but this time Alex held him back," Shut the hell up and tell us the news"

"Well…let's see…from what we can tell, he got stabbed somehow…by a knife, apparently."

Everyone rolled their eyes," What is his diagnosis, dead or alive?

" Well…he's resting, coma like state at the moment, so everything is up in the air, we stitched him up, obviously, and he's going to need some serious pain killers if he does get through this. He's going to be out of it for a while. But first he needs to rest, the more the better, so I think all of you should go home and wait for a few days before you come back so we can tell" Dr. Turner said and then turned away.

Jake felt like crying again.


	15. Dirty Little Secret

**Chapter 15: Dirty Little Secret**

_Let me know that I've done wrong_

_ When I've known this all along_

_ Gone around a time or two _

_Just to waste my time with you_

_ Tell me all that you've thrown away_

_ Find out games you don't wanna play _

_You are the only that needs to know_

_

* * *

_

**( 3 Weeks Later)**

Jake mumbled quietly to himself as Alex patted his arm reassuringly and sighed," You don't need to be afraid…"

"I'm going to a mental ward…" Jake murmured.

"I know" Alex shrugged," But…we need to figure out what's wrong with you"

"Maybe I'm just stark crazy"

"What did I tell you?" Alex snapped.

"You're not Michael, don't push you away" Jake sighed," I know, I know it's just…God-" He ran a hand through his hair, that was filled with sweat," I just need to take a break from life because I'm hurting everyone…"

"But you saved me" Alex smiled.

"One causality in the eyes of many" Jake snorted as Alex frowned, so he straightened up and smiled crookedly, " I mean…I'm happy that someone benefited from me…even if It only is one"

Alex shrugged a little," It won't be long…."

"That's what I'm afraid of, it may not be long enough, I want you Alex, I'm begging you, keep me away from Michael, matter of fact, keep Michael from me…okay?" Jake asked as Alex nodded and looked away but Jake turned him back," And tell him…it's over…I am tired of running"

Alex titled his head to the side," Wow, are you sure?"

"You see what happened to him"

"Good point, what about Remy though?" Alex asked as they turned the corner of the block, the winter's sun hitting them. Alex had one bag in his hand, Jake had a bag also, carrying his stuff. He was to be excused from class until February to get himself together. If not, he was to be kicked out of the school. "It's only two weeks" Alex murmured.

Jake stared at him," That makes it so much better"

"I'm just trying to help" Alex shrugged, remaining quiet and looking ahead.

"I know" Jake said after a few minutes. " I know…"

* * *

"He's moving back home, I am not letting him stay in some hospital bed for 10 years!" Marco said over the phone to Ryan, who was over at Brian's house with Andy and Pete, trying to help with Christmas Dinner by hauling it into the limo and getting the servant to drive. Lemmy was on vacation, much to Andy's dismay.

"Marco, it's only until he wakes up" Ryan sighed, pulling the salad covering off and snatching a tomato into his mouth, looking around to make sure no one saw him, and then closed it back.

"I saw that!" Brian yelled.

"I don't care, Ryan" Marco sighed out as Robert walked passed him carrying Tilly and humming some song. " I want him to be with us for Christmas!"

"He's in a bloody coma , Marco" Ryan said dryly.

"I know!" Marco snapped.

Ryan stared at the phone," Woah…look, I'll see you in an hour, as soon as Andy…STOPS HITTING ON THE SERVANTS!" He yelled it so Andy could hear. He hung up and turned around to see Pete standing there with a bowl of pudding," I can't believe it's been 3 weeks"

"I know, we can only take life in strides…"

"But…here" Pete stopped and handed him the envelope.

"What's this?"

Pete smiled and whistled for everyone's attention.

It didn't work.

"HEY EVERYONE!" Pete yelled, and everyone stopped.

"What?" Andy and Brian yelled at the same time.

"Come over here" Pete motioned with his hand, the other one balancing the pudding," Ryan has news"

"I do?"

"You do"

Andy and Pete crowded around Ryan as he opened the envelope and read it's contents. He gasped, dropped the paper and smiled widely," I passed! I passed! They liked my work so much…" He trailed off, beyond excited.

"Um…what does this mean?" Andy asked.

"I get to go to this special college in New York." Ryan beamed," Only the highest artistic influential people graduate from there, this is an honor in it's self"

"He's using big words, let's load the food into the car before he notices"

"Don't you mean limo?" Andy corrected Brian.

"Whatever" He pulled him away as Pete laughed," So New York, huh?"

Ryan's face fell," Yeah…Pete…"

"It's okay" Pete shrugged," I have to leave again anyway…another contest this time in Paris…"

"And you weren't going to tell me?" Ryan asked, placing a hand on his hip.

"Oh please, you knew I was" Pete laughed," I told you a week ago"

"Oh yeah…" Ryan trailed off," So we're both…"

"Going separate ways, like last year"

They shrugged at the same time. "This isn't good-bye…"

Pete busted out laughing," Hello, it's December, we have until September…"

"Oh yeah" Ryan joined in laughing.

"Help me with the food or you will all have cheese on you when you wake up!" Brian yelled from the outside.

"Let me go help him, you get the salad" Pete sighed as he went outside.

As Ryan bent over to pick up the envelope that he dropped he could hear Pete cursing Brian out and Brian laughing like crazy as usual. " I said cut it out!" Pete yelled, wiping the piece of cheese off his face.

Andy giggled politely in the corner.

* * *

_  
I'll keep you my dirty little secret_

_ Don't tell anyone or you'll be just another regret _

_My dirty little secret…  
My dirty little secret Who has to know?  
_

_When we live such fragile lives_

_ It's the best way we survive_

_ gone around a time or two _

_Just to waste my time with you…_

Jake looked around the place after the receptionist scared him off. He stood at the desk, tapping his fingers against the desk, hoping that the person that he was assigned to had a decent face and a warm personality. The person's face showed up and opened the door and Jake had to lean against the door frame," Christ…Kyle?"

"Jake…" Kyle smiled.

"You've got to be kidding me" Jake laughed sadly. " You know, it's bad enough that I ended up here in the first place!" Jake yelled, catching the whole room's attention. ' But to have your freaking step father who if I'm not mistaken ab-"

"Now that's enough, Jake" Kyle said, pulling him into the next room," I told you, I changed"

"The hell you did!"

"Look, like it or not, you can't change your person, I'm only a volunteer, your real mentor is coming shortly" Kyle sighed, " How can I get you to trust me"

"By getting out this small room" Jake snapped, pointing at the door.

Kyle sighed," You will trust me" He murmured before he closed the door. Jake fell into the bed and closed his eyes slowly, wandering what Michael was thinking. What do you think in comas? Is he okay?

* * *

Michael's pink and blue lips parted into a smile.

He was dreaming, he noticed that he was dreaming a lot lately, and he was smiling a lot. So yeah, he was dreaming again, but it wasn't really a dream, just reliving different memories and times and dates and words and phrases and colors and hues.

Hmm….lets see. He counted.

Pink. And Blue. And Black. And Red. Red scared him. Um…words of "Love" and let's see.." Beautiful" and "Alex" and "Music" And " Michael".

He tried to bite his lip, but he couldn't move, so he thought of more things. Sweat. Kisses. Sadness…that had came suddenly actually. Remy. Rory. Jake. Alex. Some guy named Scott and oh Tilly and Adrian and Trent, he can't forget them.

He remembers lights that flashed at violent rates and Leather, and well…music. Loud sharp music.

And a knife.

And a bedroom. And pain, ouchies, pain.

And he knew what happened too.

So yeah, Michael wasn't in a coma really. He liked to consider it more of a lapse in time…he could hear and see everyone, he just couldn't respond, didn't want to. The world had hurt him enough. So he thinks that now, that he can actually think straight, he is gonna be relaxed and lay low for a while. Cause he sees pretty white light and blue eyes. Pretty blonde hair hovering over him and Blue eyes. Cold blue eyes. Scared Blue eyes.

Jake's blue eyes.

Yeah, Michael's dreaming, because when he tries to reach up to touch the main source that put him here, no one is there…for once. No helicopters and police trying to break down the door, no shouts, just a dull florescent light and dull blank fixtures, an artist's broken paint brushes; artistic revisions and scattered hues. Multiple ideas and dreams and colors merged into one

Yeah, Michael dreamed a lot.

Matter of fact, he was beginning to think that he's been dreaming his whole life.

* * *

_Adrian laughed, " Christmas rocks Mikey , come on, sit with me by the tree"_

_"Yeah" Trent called out, he had been living with them since he got kicked out of his apartment after his wife dumped him, long story. " He wants a kiss under the mistletoe"_

_"Are you sure that isn't you?" Michael asked, sitting down with them._

_"No, I'm his brother…besides, I already got mines" Trent said, making them laugh._

_"The tree is awesome this year" Michael pointed out._

_"Yeah, I out did myself" Adrian nodded. " Marsh mellow?"_

_"Yes, please" Michael said, taking it from him," The dinner is to die for too"_

_"Yeah, a can of candy yams and marshmellows , God, we are pimping life." Trent smiled, he reached into his jacket and pulled out some mistletoe. " Come on now, you know the rules!"_

_"So that's where it came from" Adrian laughed._

_"I keep it handy, stop stalling" Trent said, poking his brother with one hand, raising it above him and Michael's head. " Kissy kissy"_

_"Shut up" Michael laughed, shoving him. He leaned in and kissed Adrian, it was a quick, shy kiss._

_Lasted a second._

_Adrian turned to Trent and smiled," See…kissy kissy…"_

_Trent laughed, "Do you want me to turn on the fireplace?"_

_Adrian nodded," Yeah, and give me some more of those marshmellows"_

_"Okay" Trent said getting up and bringing the 3 foot heater and bag of marsh mellows over to them, they wrapped themselves up inside the blankets, to keep warm since it was freezing and they didn't have enough money to pay for the heating bill and looked up at the tree._

_"Merry Christmas you guys" Michael whispered._

_"Merry Christmas Mikey" They both said at the same time, their Christmas tree, a small 5 foot cut out of a tree painted with glitter and pictures of a hot guy that Trent found in a magazine, glistening in their eyes._

_

* * *

_

**_-  
(AN: that is my Christmas right there, incept it's a plastic tree and we have turkey, but that's the basics of it. I hope you guys enjoyed it, I am working on the LAST part, because this story has courpted my mind with sin, so yeah, characters will come and go, chapter 16 really picks off for where I've been slacking off and time will start moving faster in the stories. I don't think you'll like this ending whatsoever. But hello, tragedy is my forte. Also, if you happen to wander around my live journal, where I bitch about my life with bad spelling and random FRANZGASAMS, I will be starting anew journal, pure fiction. I have some stuff on killer slash and slacken ties as well, and oh! I just remembered, I have an idea for a new story, as well, so you know guys, watch out! I am sick, and when I;m sick I ramble and write long author notes, and I have like pre-asmatha, so ugh yeah, I'm kinda sweaty weezy right now. Lol., ramndomness. I better stop typing. Love you all! PS: All for you remy is my page on LJ, and HUIYAYAY1! TruFate -waves-)  
_**


	16. Fearless

**Chapter 16: Fearless  
**

_ Too many fingers, too many thumbs _

_Something wicked this ways comes_

_The best time I ever had _

_Waiting around for something bad  
Fearless,  
And I know that's why you love me, chica_

* * *

Michael felt something rushing through him, something sharp and painful. All he did was feel run down, and tired. He was tired of being inside hospitals all the time, and trying to live with Jake all the time and trying to live without Jake all the time all he wanted was a compramise! All he wanted was a normal life, normal friends and a normal personality. He was tired of being left out in the dark and always being on the backburner, tired of being on the receiving end of backlash, always being hurt. And he was so afraid…so afraid that this isn't the last time, it's never the last time, things only get worse from here, they always do, at least where he's concerned. He could hear people yelling in the hall, distant voice, voices wrapped around his throat like some sort of dangerous twisted noose.

He didn't want to become cynical, but he was afraid that he was on the verge of doing so.

And he was so…hot..

Sweat was rolling down his face as fast and furious as the tears that were bleed in with mascara and gloss only a few weeks ago. His whole body was on fire, each part of him, sizzling. He just wanted to be drenched in water, but he kind of liked the feeling of being messed up like this, because when you're in a coma bad things can't happen, cause you're already the worst thing there. You can't sink any lower, unless you count death.

And he wasn't counting death.

He smiled, he had something against Jake.

Jake was scared.

Michael wasn't, Michael was fearless.

Because he had been through it all. And then some, and that makes him smile.

He always had a pretty smile.

And eyes, oh his eyes were so pretty and deep and hurt, he didn't want to become some sort of cliché as Jake had pointed out before, were they past clichés? I mean, really now, was he so, lost and hurt and confused that he had actually been decked down to becoming a cliché? Was he ready to become a cliché?

Oh, yes, Michael was in a cliché league all his own.

He started a mental reveloution, because he couldn't get out of his mind the fact that in some odd way, he sort of wanted Jake to be standing there when he woke up, smiling that sad smile, frowning in that confused agitated way and doubled over in chair with his hair falling into his face, covering it completely and making him look normal. And then when he woke up Jake would smile and say something stupidly clichéd like "Oh my god, it's a miracle Mikey, you're alive" or "I prayed for you"

But knowing Jake he'd probably smile and go " What took you so long?" Stick out his tongue and laugh, at nothing, because that's what they did. They laughed at nothing, because when you've been through it all, nothing is pretty damn funny.

So Michael laughed.

He laughed until he passed out.

* * *

Something tickled Jake's throat, the type of soft tickle that makes you want to laugh to get it out. A sick little chuckle. And he hadn't laughed in such a long time. And he was so afraid, so afraid that this wasn't the last time, he knew it wasn't the last time, because with him and Michael, things were never settled, nothing was ever settled. There were voices all around him, quiet whispers, quiet whispers and laughs and smiles and suddenly summer day in the sprinklers and old people cursing them out for flaunting their life style and to get the hell out of their garden.

And then he felt sad, sad because he wouldn't be like that again.

And then suddenly…Michael had something against him.

Because Jake was afraid…

Michael, oh Michael was fearless.

And he missed laughing at nothing, because Michael and him were nothing…but two kids, who were best friends, who did everything together, and he felt bad, that he ended up in some twisted way, put someone else's life in jeopardy of being in danger ( screw that, he stabbed the kid) and all he had to do, all he felt at the moment, was the urge to laugh. He wanted to laugh.

He wanted to laugh at everything.

He didn't want to be crazy.

He wasn't afraid of becoming it.

He just didn't want to be crazy.

And then he thought, what would happen when he got better? When Michael got better? Would he find Michael standing there, leaning against the door, his hair in his face as usual, pale skin, but bright green eyes, hanging on the ledge with that same old smirk, the annoying one that had "Look at me being angst" written all over at and then he'd poke him and murmur something along the lines of "Come on Jakey, we're not dead yet" And laugh, because he'd do something stupid, like make a face, or tickle him, or tell a bad joke (even though it was Jake who told the bad jokes) and then he'd tug him by his shirt and say something ridiculous like " I missed you" being blunt as usual, even though the feeling with mutual and blush and look away and then Jake would end up laughing, telling Michael that he was " Odd" or maybe "cute when he pouts" and they'd go and do something together, something stupid.

So then the tickle came back again.

Caught Jake by surprise, like a cry almost.

It was a strong one.

He started laughing. He laughed so hard it hurt.

Laughed so hard he fell off the bed.

Nothing is funny.

He laughed until his eyes closed and he fell asleep.

* * *

"I hate Christmas" Marco sighed, rolling around in his bed with the covers wrapped around him. He didn't want to get up, eyes dull and mouth carrying a horrible taste of what seemed to be snuck stuffing from the bowl from last night, when him and Ryan went down stairs around 12 at night., Andy, Brian and Pete passed out on the floor with icing on their mouth…they thought at least, they were never sure with those three, un wrapped the foil containing the stuffing that Pete was supposed to be guarding and stuffed as much as they could into their mouth before running back upstairs and laughing stupidly. He yawned, making his feet rise and kicked Ryan, who was on the floor, too tired to climb into is bed which was only two inches away and said it louder this time," I hate Christmas"

Ryan yawned," Shut up Marco, you love it" He rolled on the floor a bit and hit his head on the bar of Marco's bed, cursing and rubbing his head he looked up to see snow on the window. " I think someone just needs a boyfriend to share that holiday cheer"

"I do not" Marco protested, but they both knew it was true." I just wish Michael was here, and Jake"

"Arg" Ryan said, waving his hand, changing the subject," I'm hungry"

" You're always hungry" Marco remarked, getting up and going over to his closet to find something presentable to wear downstairs. He clapped his hands, the lights flickering on and opened the closet. " I want to make some snow angels, you wanna help me?"

"Whatever" Ryan shrugged," Beats watching Brian hit on my brothers"

"No…" Marco laughed," Not Mark and Mike"

"I was talking about Robert" Ryan laughed," Christ, he wants anything with a-"

"Boys! Come down stairs!" Mrs. Del Rossi yelled quickly," Get dressed now, we're going out."

"We are?" Marco and Ryan asked, confused.

"Yes!" She yelled.

Marco and Ryan looked at each other before getting dressed quickly. Marco because she was his mother and Ryan because he was afraid of her mighty Italian wrath.

* * *

" 99 Hot guys with beer on the wall" Brian sang cheerfully wearing a dark leather jacket, some jeans and a white turtle neck," 99 Hot guys with beer" 

"Take one down and pass him around" Andy joined in, laughing. His hair was tucked under a red hat, with cute little ear flaps. He wore a red sweater with the quote of "Holiday queer" on it and matching black pants with red stitches on the side. He wanted to wear a shirt that said " Ho Ho Ho" but he opted against it.

"98 hot guys with beer on the wall" Pete chuckled. He pulled his scarf around his neck, matching his jeans jacket and jeans and sighed," 98 hot guys with beer on the wall"

"98 hot guys with beer!" Ryan cheered in, unusually happy, His dark hair was once again tucked under a hat, black this time with his black button down sweater that went diagonally down the rows with buttons and designs with a matching black pair of pants, he smiled again," You take one down and pass him around…"

Marco looked up. " 97...hot guys, with beer" He said it uneasily. He pulled his white gloves tighter onto his hands, adjusting them slowly and pulled at his sweater, a beige one with a hoddie and little cotton tail draw strings. He wasn't in a very festive mood. Robert finally spoke up, dull brown eyes upset that he hasn't seen Michael while holding a bundled up Tilly, " Where are we going?"

"To see Jake" Mrs. Del Rossi said calmly as Robert looked up, eyes red.

"Um…can't you drop me off at Michael's?" He asked quietly.

"Why?" Marco asked, suspicious.

"Because I don't see how you could give him a new chance time and time again after you've seen what he's been doing to Michael" Robert said angrily," And if you don't, that's okay, but ever since the first time I really talked with Michael I've realized…that he deserves so much more…he could have it so much better…"

" With you" Ryan snorted as Robert shot him a dirty look.

Marco raised his eyes," Excuse me?"

Pete tried to lighten the situation," We all have our first crushes…"

"And who was yours?" Ryan asked, crossing his arms.

"Sally Simpson…"

"I meant boy" Ryan's eyes narrowed.

"You" Pete murmured.

Brian coughed as Andy patted his back," I think we should get back to the conversation at hand which is Michael and Robert-"

" Have you not noticed that Michael is a human being with limits as well?" Robert snapped, making Tilly anxious.

"Yeah" Ryan sighed," We're not choosing sides or anything but we think that you're getting a little out of hand with some crush-"

"Crush?" Brian laughed.

"Robert too? Christ, did your mom purposely raise you all gay?" Andy laughed.

"All of you, I thought Robert…." Marco trailed off, tightening his gloves again and looking at Ryan who breathed out "Shit " as Robert shot him a dull smile," Besides, I don't have a crush on Michael, at least not as much as you have one on-" He was about to finish his sentence as Mrs. Del Rossi swerved to the left and murmured " Damn potholes"

Andy smiled at her conversation diversion as he waved his little white flag in the air," Hello, holiday cheer here people, get into the spirit and if Robert wants to go and see Michael we will not object, right?"

Several murmurs floated into the air but the whole time Marco looked at Ryan, who was suddenly very interested in burying his head into Pete's jacket.

* * *

_This is what it's all about _

_Take me in and eat me out _

_Pins and needles in my arms _

_Lucky eyes and lucky charms_

Michael laid down in the bed, his breathing and the steady hum of the machine the only indication that he was alive. Robert smiled sadly as he took a seat next to him, placing his scarf down on the bed and unzipping his jacket. He paused, taking in Michael's calm face, the happiest he had ever seen and leaned back against the chair," Hey…um…Michael" He trailed off, shaking his head," This is so stupid, I know you can't hear me…"He leaned in laughing," Or maybe you can…I never knew with you…I still never know with you. So um…like…how's life inside a coma?" He snorted a little, blinking back sadden tears. " It um…yea- it um hurts to see you like this…but I know you don't really mind…I don't know how getting stabbed leads to a coma, but you know, whatever, this is the happiest you've ever been, so like…stay in one as long as you want…" He shrugged a little, looking down at the tiles on the floor.

"Um…Jake is sad" Robert stopped again, looking at Michael," But…I don't feel bad for him anymore"

_"Well, he should be"_ Michael thought numbly

"It feels odd without you in the house, Tilly keeps asking for you, and she finally said that Adrian was her dad, you should've seen it, after you gave her the box before you went to…wherever you were, and I'm mad at you for lying to me. Not for lying to me really, but because what happened your life got messed up because of it…" Robert sighed, placing his hand over Michael's IV filled one.

"But you know, things have changed at school. Someone keeps asking for you in class, someone named Jackson?" Robert frowned," Whose he?" He laughed," I'm acting like a jealous boyfriend…I tapped the special MTV special for you, the one with The Killers? I know how much you love them, it's funny how Marco got us all hooked on it"

_"Jackson…?" _Michael mentally squinted._ " Oh…the new kid"_

"It's raining…" He trailed off, looking at the window, Michael's bed was positioned next to it," I wish you could see it, it should be snowing you know, but it's raining, that's funny. Christmas was always awkward in my house, and I have a feeling it will be in Marco's house as well. I just feel out of place now, Lizzy and Sarah are going through their boy phases now, Mike and Mark have gotten over Barney and are into Power Rangers now…Tilly's a freaking genius , she's gonan be a builder. Not a dyke" He frowned at the stereotype and then laughed a little," Ryan is…well…being boy crazy with Marco, Andy and Brian are being them and Pete is busting out poetry like crazy. And I'm…just…nowhere…I have no talents…"

_"That's not true"_

"I'm not that handsome"

_"Such a lie!"_

"And I mean, look at me, nobody wants this face…" Robert sighed off, placing his head against the edge of Michael's bed," What have I done to help anyone? Even you are better off on your own, maybe I should be too, you know? Just escape for a while…"

Michael's hands curled into Robert's hair and he shot up automatically," Michael?" He asked, squinting and looking hard for a trace of anything, a playful smile, a sign of life, anything! But all he got was Michael's oddly calm look and closed eyes, his hand was still curled as Robert sighed and placed his head by the edge of the bed again," You're an odd kid, Mikey"

_"Shut up"_

Michael's fingers curled into his hair again.

Robert laughed.

_

* * *

_

Michael was dreaming again.

Oh, he dreamed a lot.

So what was the dream this time? Michael squinted from the floor of the school backward, where the fence cut off towards the back where the trees were at and leaned against the hard concrete. He opened up his eyes, rainwater draining into his green pupils and making him blink them out, soaking through his body right to the bone, making him shiver and smile, because nothing was wrong at the moment.

The sky was gray and black, and the rain sounded like a merry go round chime in his ears. He had the feeling as if a spider was crawling across him as someone poked him in the sides, wide eyes and flashy features, as he rolled over and stuck out his tongue he looked into their eyes and smiled a little," I told you…" He said, feigning agitation," I hate it when you poke me"

They shrugged, blue eyes shining and black hair plastered to their face. " I know" Was all they said, poking him once more in the chest before drawing their hand away slowly and sighing. Lips pursed together they wondered aloud," So…um…what happened?"

Green eyes looked up again, momentarily, because he wasn't ready to answer that question, even though he knew that this was a dream and that all of the things occurring in here were fictional, even though he prayed that they weren't. So instead he shrugged again and rolled over to look at them.

They blinked," Do I have something on my face?"

"No"

"Then what?"

Michael paused, looking at them a little longer, a teasing smile on his face, lips closed, eyes clear and hands tempted to run their way through the other's smooth lifeless hair. He felt someone poke his side again as he rolled his eyes, still not answering.

"I hate it when you never finish your sentences!" They laughed out, poking him again. On the third poke Michael grabbed their hand and rolled them over so he was eye to eye with them and breathed out, the cold air around them making his breath come out in slow puffs like a mental cigarette," I told you I hate when you poke me"

The other's smile faded.

"But…" Michael stopped, smiling, eyes bright and full of childhood innocence again. " Since I'm with you…" He kissed them on the head and pulled them closer," It's okay"

"I know" They winked back at Michael," Because I am like…so special"

"Yes, you are" Michael laughed. " Why else would be sitting in the rain in the middle of a school yard?"

"Cause," They shrugged.

"Because what…?"

The other person remained silent.

"We're extraordinary?" Michael tried to finish their sentence for them, but they only shook their head, their hair sliding and hitting themselves in the face. As they rubbed their eyes they looked up to see Michael frowning.

"What?" They laughed out.

"I hate it when you don't finish your sentences!" Michael pouted.

They laughed until Michael silenced them with a poke in the arm," I was going to say…simple"

"What?" Michael blinked.

"We're simple" They repeated again," No complications, no extraordinary situations, just pure facts. We're simply the hottest coupling on earth, and nothing we could ever do to each other would drive us away" They shrugged, poking them" Does that answer your question mister?"

Michael thought for a second, and then nodded, opened his mouth to speak when the other stopped him," I know…so can we just watch the rain for a little while longer? I sort of like these dreamy affairs of ours, they're rather tedious!"

Michael nodded and looked back up at the sky, holding their hands. Green eyes blinked again, as the wind picked up and blew something into his eye. Sitting up, cursing he tried to pick it out but they ended up getting it out for him.

"Thanks…" Michael whispered, laying down again, shivering.

"I have two baby brothers, this comes natural to me" They shrugged.

"I mean it, Robby"

Robert looked at him, blue eyes content and smiled, that small smile that he loved to do before nodding.

"I know"

* * *

Robby? Ermm...hmmm...who thinky that Robert and Mikey may hook up any time soon? Any hands? looks around We'll see. Oh and Michael will be dreaming a lot, so be warned 


	17. No Breaks

**I feel so rude you guys, by not replying to your reviews. That's just very shitty of me, even though I'm sick there's no excuse, so to make it up to you, I'll give you a sneak preview of the next, and final part of this merry go round story of mines. Also, fuck the rules, if you gusy have any questions just ask me in the review, I'll reply to them as soon as possible, and sure…I forget who asked me, sorry I have faulty memory sometimes, but you can use Adrian Asher as your character's name! I nocticed that Michael is funnier when he's in a coma.  
**

**Autum: **I can't have happy endings? Or can I? Hhmmm. Do you mean ryan? Ryan's trying to get into an art school in new york. Kyle won't be around long, don't worry! Love ya! I have to get yopu a present since you turn 16! I'll update then for you!

**Bee:** I noticed that you've been reviewing my stuff lately and I just wanna say "Hiya!" before I reply, cause you know, it's rude if I didn't I love you as well :nods: we all love each other. I update all the time because I write all the time. My grandmother says I;m addicted, but I think it's just a mental thing You listen to Michael? Yes, isn't that some perfectly erotic. I'm getting major influences by those gusy, hell, half the stuff comes from their songs anyway. You don't' sound stupid! Thanies ever so much for reviewing!

**BlackRose:** It doesn't matter where the hot guy is on the Christmas tree, as long as he's there! Lol. Michae;'s dreaming is an important part of the story now. Thankies for reviewing! Hope you like this one as well!

**GP:** (AKA Gavrio Princip) And I'm sorry Prince, but I just have to say Bang Bang, for whatever reason.. I think that the Canadians do say it like that. My best friend doesn't….I mean, does, sometimes. Eh. Thanks for the review

**Tears:** wards? Balls? Wait, lol, that doesn't rhyme! -covers mouth with two year old stiffled laugh- You're Italian! I speake a little Italian, I wanted to learn it as a second language after watching Marco sau "Oh mio dio". No, Robert is Jake and Michael's age. Marco is Ryan, Pete, Andy and Brian's age. Don't be confused, eh!

**Azury**: Dear god,I was refusing to update until you reviewed, but I had a bad feeling that you were sick again, and decided to. YOU HAVE TO GET BETTER! OMMGZZZ, I'm sad now, cause I don't want you to be sick! Wait. You said computer virs. Oh goody! Well not goodddy, but at least you're not sick! No…Michael's not waking up any time soon. I'm going to drag this out painfully. The skirt action has evolved, you can say, the way they do it now will be much more interesting. You know with me I always tie in every single tiny fragment of information I spill into my stories in here. I cant say…you always give away my plot anyway missy! But I love ya like woah, and I hope you like this one as well!

* * *

**Chapter 17: No Brakes**

The dull blank page sat in front of him, fingers poised out and eager to type, anything, at the moment he glared into the white screen, kicking the computer and muttering "Damn you" quietly to himself. It used to be so easy to bust out report after report and essay after essay but lately he's been having trouble doing the simplest things such as just doing his homework. Granted, it was a uber bore, but he was good at it, he was starting to feel dumb. Maybe he needed a sugar rush, he used to rip open a bag of skittles with his teeth at midnight and burn away on the keys for hours, or until his mom kicking him all, normally the latter of the two. But a very angry Ryan hid all the chocolates and candies from him in revenge of Marco throwing his pencils out of the window. Ever since Christmas things had changed, and they weren't exactly good. It wasn't hard to figure out that Ryan was up to something, he's been way too happy lately.

And well…what about him?

What was he doing in his life? Where the hell was he going? That thought made him pissed out and slam his hands on the keyboard again, but then he just hit his head against the computer when a message came up saying that his computer had a virus on it because he downloaded too many episodes of "Queer as Folk" and techno music, which he couldn't help, because it was all so addictive and that if he didn't delete it soon his computer would crash.

Needless to say, he was having a crappy night.

And well last week he had went to the store after school, looking for The Killers CD since his other one broke after Mark and Mike got a hold of it and then he tried to get diapers for Tilly even though they thought that she was too old for them and then the diapers came out to being like…20 dollars for the whole big pink pack, so he couldn't get The Killer's CD afterwards, which pissed him off even more. He failed his test that day as well, because he was clueless when it came to English Poets of the 19th century because the day before that when he was supposed to be studying Ryan had kept him up by arguing with Robert about English Poets of said 19th century, because they were both geeks, and Marco tuned them out, because he didn't know that at the time they were practically throwing and yelling to him the answers of the test/

So scratch that, he was having a crappy night. Well, tomorrow was New Years eve, and he was torn between seeing how Jake was doing and seeing how Michael's condition was. And some people were saying that Marco has been way too nonchalant over the whole situation between the two boys but the hell was he supposed to do? He knew Jake had past issues, he just never thought that they'd come up and bite him this badly and really now…he was his son, his bloody son. The person that he'd practically give his life for, do anything for, and when your kid like…fucks up, what are you supposed to do?

You yell at them, maybe spank them, scold them and then tell them what they did was wrong.

But that doesn't work with Jake.

He tried ignoring him.

That made him bitter. And for all you people out there who say "I'm not bitter" or " No, it's not like that" you are in denial, because, yes, you are and yes it is like that. And Marco knows, yes, yes, he knows.

He bit his lip, he was pissed off again, thinking about things made him pissed off easily. He was angry because he missed Franz Ferdinand's "Do You Want To" video, which he had been pining to see all week. Really now, come on, Alex Kapranos on a ladder of bikes? Paul in a cat suit? Alex singing "You're famous friend, well I blew him before you, oh yeah" What do you think? Marco was dying, especially since it's true in Dylan's case…he had a famous friend…

Marco rolled his eyes.

But then he suddenly smiled, that stupid "Yeah I just got the most brilliant idea but back away from me because it's mines, damnit! See my copyright?" smile. He bit his lip again, listened to Ryan who was sleeping in the corner with a dull hum for a second, he had fallen asleep while painting a new picture, he was oddly busting them out right and left, before he placed his fingers to the key board and began to type away, happily nodding to the rhythm of the keyboard's clatter clatter under his fingers.

* * *

Ryan poked him awake as Marco got scared and fell out of the seat," I told you to stop doing that!" He snapped, rubbing his butt as he got off the floor and glared at him.

Ryan laughed," Exactly, wake up, we have to go to Brian's, I mean hell, I mean Brian's, I mean hell…well whatever way you want to put it. Your mom wants you to take out the trash before we leave and did you see the new video for Do You Want To? It's freaking awesome, I am so doing that dance at lunch…" Ryan trailed off as Marco glared at him.

Ryan smirked, voice low," You didn't see it, eh?"

"Get out" Marco murmured with fake anger, pointing to the door.

"Okay" Ryan shrugged, singing the catchy hook of "Do do do do dododo do do do" as he walked away.

Marco looked over at his computer screen and blinked in shock," Holy hell" He squinted, he had typed 36 pages….on what though? All he remembers was fuming about the video (Which he was now hell bent on seeing) and then falling asleep. He had fallen asleep by the keyboard? He read some of it's content off the screen:

"It's not really a bad thing when a break up goes wrong, because you can't always blame yourself, and people have their ways of coping, be it music, food, writing, or whatever floats your boat, but I'm telling you it's okay to feel sad and blame yourself, I'm not going to lie, I do it all the time. I mean, how can you not blame yourself? There are so many "What-if's" in there, what if I hadn't have said that, or did this, or looked that way on that day, or smile that day, and so on. But…why should we be doing this? Shouldn't the other person be feeling remorse as well? Why should we be alone in suffering? I say that it's okay to feel bad and blame yourself, but don't let it suck you in and take over you, because you might end up like me…alone…"

"Woah…" Marco looked over his words," Okay…" He blinked, was he talking to himself out loud again? Because he has a teacher that does that and it's plane creepy. So he switches to internal monologue mode and decides to take a shower, get dressed, do as his mother pleases and then sent it over to Tyler ASAP before his ass is fired, if it isn't already.

* * *

Michael was still dreaming, and come to think of it, he was beginning to think that his dreams were better than some real life situations.

He looked them in the eyes, cold and tired, and smiled a little, just a little, to tide them over. When they didn't smile back his smile faded slightly and he reached uneasily to take a sip of water from the dirty glass that he had left on the table, but when he picked it up his fingers shook, so the water spilled into the other person's lap..

"You know we can't keep doing this" They said dryly, wrinkling their nose as they wiped an ice cube off of their lap, it had spilled out along with the water. Their eyes lit up sadly," Michael…are you listening?"

Michael's head snapped up," Yes, yes…oh…um…yeah, I know….it's just…"

"Just what?"

"It's odd, because we never seem to be apart for so long before we're together again…I mean…why don't we just get married and get it over with?"

The person snorted," We'd be divorced the next day"

Michael sighed," True…" He tried to take a sip of water again, but once more it landed in the person's lap.

"I think I'll hold onto that" They said, snatching the cup from his hands and placing it on the table," What are we going to do?"

"I dunnno" Michael shrugged.

"That's all you have to say?" They asked, somewhat irritated.

"It's a dream, and in some inane way I know this, I don't have any answer for you because in or out of consciousness it's never simple to answer one of your damn questions" Michael sat up a little in his chair," How can we keep asking each other the same things over and over and over again? I am so fucking…sick of repeating this cycle of Love-Me-Love-Me-Not that we have! I need an answer now, do you love me or do you hate me?"

" I could ask the same question for you" They said dryly, a sullen smirk playing on their lips.

"It would be both" Michael snapped," We can never make up our mind!"

The other shrugged," I know, I know…"

"Then what are we supposed to do?"

"You normally have the answers"

"I don't know Jake!" Michael sighed," Can I sleep on it?"

Jake raised an eyebrow and laughed," You are right now…"

"Oh yeah…"

"Michael…?"

"Mikey…oh Mikey…wake up Michael…."

Michael blinked a little," Jake?"

"Wake up Michael, I know you can hear me…"

* * *

"Michael…wake up" The person whispered into his ear.

Michael made no response but internally sighed _"Damn, I was trying to have a conversation…okay…it was a dream, but whatever"_

Someone poked him.

"Michael, you know what, you're not fooling anyone with this whole façade, you can't fool me"

Michael rolled his eyes mentally,"_ Please"_

"Well fine then, I'll just talk…to you…cause I know your listening!" They sat in the bed besides him and Michael stopped for a second to wonder was he dreaming or not, but by the way the person's voice sounded over exaggerated and tired, painted with hues of tired red eyes and too long lashes he knew he wasn't dreaming, his mind didn't come up with stupid characters like that. " Jake has done something stupid" They paused, sighing," He's a stupid kid, you made him a stupid kid, because he told me one day…" They stopped.

Michael wondered for a second who the hell this kid was when he realized it was Alex, obviously because of the insecurity in his voice, little did people know, but Michael could always hear the distress in someone's voice, hell, he had been through it all, so he would know. So instead he moved slightly, tried to speak, saying that yeah, he was just faking and that he could talk, but when he tried to nothing came out incept for a moan, a sort of gasp and then a sharp crack in his side. He tried to curl his fingers, but he couldn't even do that.

Suddenly fear slipped through him as Michael realized maybe he was in a coma…

Stupid fear.

Alex petted his hair," I knew you could hear me, but don't bother trying to move like that" He said as he lifted up the sheet on the side to see his right side of his hip, which was stitched up slightly sloppily and pressed his hand against his side, making Michael black out just from the slight touch of it," Yeah…that's got to hurt" When Michael came to again, his breath is regulated gasps he could tell that Alex was still there, watching him intently. " Well, before you passed out, I was saying Jake did something stupid. Because you made him stupid, you know that right? You made him the blind dumb abusive kid that he is today, and I'm rather happy that you did, because you and I both know we can't picture Jake any other way, am I right?"

_"Rig- ht…Christ, even thinking hurts"_ Michael sighed

"So yeah, Jake's over at Adrian's grave, wherever the hell that is seeking advice."

Michael snorted,_" Shit"_

"So you know, before he left, he told me to tell you that it's over and that he was tired of running, and that's why he had to do this now before something happened" Alex's eyes were lowered. " What is he doing?" He whispered at Michael, who was still laying in the bed like some sort of handsome paraplegic. Alex's hands tightened around Michael's collar and pulled his body up," I swear if something happens to him…Michael…you see, you may be over him, but I…" Alex trailed off, red eyes and dark features.

Michael's heart went out to him," _He's falling for him"_ That made him sort of jealous but he got over it. He already knew that people in emotional distress gravitate towards Jake, he saves them and then takes care of them, because that way, he can deny that he's just as fucked as they are.

Alex's hands slipped away," I'm sorry"

_"It's okay, I've been smacked around before"_

He sighed," How does he do it?"

"Beats me, I've been trying to figure this out for the past 12 years"

Alex blinked a little," I don't know you that well, but could I…stay here for a while?"

_"Sure, I like company…as long as you don't try and strangle me again"_

Alex leaned back into the chair and sighed, the rain outside the window picked up.

* * *

A sharp raw smell filled the air as Jake looked around, standing in the middle of the cheapest cemetery that he had ever seen. He spotted the grave that he was looking for automatically, due to the fact that there were blue roses placed over the grave, a dead give away since that was the boy's favorite color. 

The thick smog parted momentarily as he saw down, well rather squatted, and eyed the headstone suspiciously:

**Trent Asher June 14 1984- August 20 2005**

He guessed they fished out his body from the river, but it was the grave next to it that he needed to see. He glanced over and saw Adrian's grave, in all it's morose glory, sitting there and somehow triggering a million memories of how he messed up. But maybe that's what dragged him here in the first place, that burning annoying pounding in the back of his head that oh so desperately needed a little clarity to fill his clouded vision. So he took a deep breath and rubbed his head gently, trying to think and just relax. He whispered something outrageous and in-coherent before blinking and a smile erupted onto his face, as large and dark as the first time he saw Michael bruised and battered on a rainy day months ago at the bus terminal.

But of course he wouldn't dare give his sudden epiphany credit to the diseased Adrian, because, well, he was still a stubborn idiot. He knew that what he had to do now, and his mind was already concocting a brilliant plan as usual, he could hear the bells whistling and chiming.

And then it all stopped.

And he frowned because he knew he couldn't carry out said plan because there was no sure fir reason for Michael to participate. What-so-ever. So now he was stuck in a rut once again, but this time he had an excuse to hesitate, to pause, to wonder what the hell to do next. But now the new issue was not "What now?" but more along the lines of "Who now?"

* * *

Marco rolled his eyes," This is the third time you sang this song"

Brian smirked ruefully, twirling the microphone in between his fingers and laughed at him dryly," Marco, this is one of the best songs ever" He paused to put the microphone back to his lips as he swirled around," Well do ya, do ya do ya wanna, wanna go? Where I never let you before…do do do do do do do do"

Everybody was just rubbing in the fact that they heard the song and Marco hadn't.

And this was how he was spending his New Years eve, doing shitty karaoke with his friends.

Ryan and Pete swayed around in the back of the living room, being quiet and closed off for once and Andy came down to sit next to him," Okay, I just read it" He said, smiling brightly as opposed to his mood from before, he moved his freshly painted black nails across Marco's eyes to get his attention as Brian proceeded to do the Do You Want To Dance and sing "Lucky lucky, you're so lucky"

"Well, what do you think of it?"

"It's perfect" Andy nodded, smiling again.

"Wait, why are you so happy? Are you just saying that you only liking it because you're happy?" Marco asked, writer's paranoia kicking in," Hey, do you have a date, tell me!"

Andy rolled his eyes," Marco, shut up, I don't have a date. But Brian is cracking me up"

Brian danced around " When I woke up tonight I said IIIIIIIIIIeeeehhhh! Gonna make somebody looovvveee meeee"

Marco snorted with laughter and had to put down the soda he was drinking. " Okay, fine, then what do you really think?"

"It's edgy, and hurtful, and perfect" Andy smiled again, " Stop worrying, now dance with me, come on, we have to hear you sing"

Marco shook his head," Um…No…I' uh-" Andy yanked him up out of the chair as Pete dipped Ryan in the background and spun him around. " What's gotten into the two of them?" Marco asked as Andy shoved Marco into Brian, who held the mic close to him and murmured out," Can I finish that last part?"

"Just sing it" Marco and Andy said at the same time, smiling." You know you want to"

Brian smiled," You sure?"

Andy nodded," Yeah."

Brian was about to sing when he stopped," Want to sing it together?"

Marco smirked while Andy released a girly Squee! Of happiness. " On the count of three…"

"1..."

"2..."

"You're famous friend, well I blew him before you, oh yeah!"

They all started laughing as Marco snatched the mic and began dancing around to the Bravery, " Downtown in the shade" He spun around as Andy yelled out," Oh yeah!"

"Staring at the sunshine in my face"

"Alright!" Brian sang out as well.

"Telling me to come and hide, come and play"

"It's true!"

"I'm telling you the sun never goes away"

"Oh yeah"

"And All I do is talk, talk, talk all day!"

"All I do is talk all day!" Andy yelled.

"I'm laughing my life away"

"Laughing away!" Pete said, joining in.

"Staring at the sun again"

"Staring at you!" Ryan yelled.

"Till everything is fading!" Marco spun around the mic stand, crashing into the couch and laughing like hell.

They continued to act stupid through the night singing to such tunes of "Mr. Bright side, Michael, Do You want To, 6 times may I add, Lean Back, ( Who knew Andy could rap?) basically every The Killers song and Franz Ferdinand song, a hell ova lot of disco music, and as the ball dropped they did a special rendition of Green Buck's "Spunk" in memory of queer as folk.

* * *

Michael smiled slowly, yeah it hurt, but he smiled anyway, in his dream, his dream.

Alex raised an eyebrow at him, amused at the fact that Michael was showing a hint of emotion and finally, suddenly, he said something, said it clear, and tired, and loudly and Alex's smile widened when that was all that he said, and then went back to being motionless once more.

"Aren't you tired of hurting me, of us hurting each other?"

Alex nodded," I'll tell him that"

People out side screamed out " New Year" as Alex smiled sadly.

Alone.

* * *

**Sneak Preview: Woot, this feels like a movie. And if you're confused with who Jake is talking to, that's a good thing.**

"Love, undying, unyielding love. Ever felt that?"

"It's fucking horrible" Jake droned out, picking up and flower and crushing it.

Michael's eyes lit up," Yes yes, horrible. I somehow knew you'd understand. It's horrible Jake. And I miss it. I miss that pain"

"Andrew" Jake said in a quiet voice, eyes squinting in the dull moonlight. The plastic fake classical music from inside floated around then as he tried to think properly and sighed instead. " Whatever love…or glimmer of love you may feel, it's gone." He said it dryly. " Love is a word, a nasty four letter word that people toss around as an excuse for their actions at the current time. It's a word of dangerous and epic proportions. It causes devistation. Terror and depression." He bit his lip as Michael's eyes widened with shock and anticipation for Jake to finish. "It's better you feel empty than to love at all"

"But Jake" Michael's voice was excited," Have you ever felt this way? To cause you to think that--"

"My first and only love was my darkest period in my life" Jake said, point blank. " It was a spiraling black hole of emotions, ups and downs and pain. It made me realize that whatever I do in life, I should never do that again"

"Love again?" Michael asked.

"Never" Jake whispered," Never Andrew"

* * *

That's it. You guys know I;m a whore for franz, so don't be shocked at DO YOU WANT TO being in this chapter. Because I do. I do wanna go Where they never let me before. Lol, I am way too happy. I have to eat something! Love you all!11 -weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee- -spiuns away like an anime character- 


	18. Untitled

**We all need a good laugh after drama, so I present to you: GAY DRAMA! In the words of Andy, prepare for angst, slash and perversion like no other. Lol, and HAPPY BIRTHDAY AUTUM WAOOOO!**

**

* * *

**

**Chapter 18: (No title for once)  
**

Jake folded his hands inside his lap, a woman in front of him writing down a bunch of ridiculous shit on a piece of paper and him getting more bored and tired by the second," Jake, there's nothing wrong with you, NO mental illness, no substances inside of you…nothing out of the ordinary" She pulled her glasses off and squinted at him dryly," You're perfectly fine, you can go home"

"No…I mean…wait" Jake sat up, " There has to be something wrong with me"

She shook her head," No, none whatsoever"

Jake looked fucking shocked," I-"

"You know what I think?" She asked, getting up," I think you want to find something wrong with you so that way you can justify your actions."

Jake wrapped his arms around himself and leaned against the wall sadly.

* * *

"How long have you been sitting in here?" Robert asked as Alex woke up from falling asleep on the edge of Michael's bed and shrugged," I don't know, do you want me to leave or something?"

Robert shook his head," Um…no, wait, why are you even here?"

"I just wanted to see who the famous Michael was up close and personal, he's a nice guy you know, a little talkative but still nice" Alex smiled as he sat up a little and starched in the chair, his back popping painfully. He blinked up at him again, because people seem to blink a lot when confused and or agitated and asked," What are you doing here?"

"I'm here to see him…" Robert said dryly," Don't you need to be back at that boarding school or whatever you and Jake do?"

"Remy's got that covered" Alex shrugged. In fact, at that very moment Remy was telling the teachers that Alex and Jake were doing a very special report on the trials and troubles of being in a mental home, ultimately contributing towards their final grade and hopefully a scholarship, because Remy was now officially afraid that Jake would kill him.

Rip him apart.

And if he didn't by some miracle, he knew Alex would be more than happy to.

Yeah, he pushed the limits with that whole camera fiasco…oh well. He'd do it again.

Anyway, Robert and Alex were staring each other down, about to have another bona fide Remy and Jake debate like before, when Alex suddenly broke contact and looked at the floor," You look familiar" He squinted at the floor instead of at Robert.

Robert nodded, " Wait…whoa, you're Alex…that Alex…this…" Robert bit his lip," The kid from the news, that was you?" He sighed, shocked, he remembered that day.

* * *

_He had been hanging out with Ryan, just the two of them, when there were police and ambulances up the block. He couldn't remember the age, it wasn't that long ago, maybe a year, or two? He didn't remember, just remembered breaking free from Ryan's grasp and running to see what happened._

_They were at some sort of dorm, the police were talking with random people and students and teachers and then there was a kid, sitting on the edge of the ambulance, with his hands buried into his hair, his cheeks pink from tears, his hair a mess, and over all, he looked petrified._

_Robert wandered over next to him and asked," Hey, do you know what's happening? Are you okay?" He was always a talkative person, and he was just dying to know what happened here. The boy looked up, sharp quick movement, teeth chattering and red eyes, and coughed, trying to speak but instead falling forwards into Robert._

_Robert, shocked by the action, barely caught him in his arms as he petted his hair, confused and waited for them to say something._

_They never did._

_Another boy, someone with a bad attitude and a handsome face ran over and called out," Alex…Alex come on, get off of him, they want to ask you some questions…" The kid pulled him up off Robert and smiled at him before slinging an arm over his shoulders and pulling him away._

_He could hear the weak reply of "Jake…" in a sad broken voice, but he couldn't be sure as they disappeared into the crowd_

_The sad kid looked back at Robert one more time._

* * *

"That was you? You were Alex, from that case…you were the…victim?" Robert asked, stammered.

Alex shrugged," Yeah…" He trailed off, unease at the fact that the memory came back into view so easily as he stood up and looked at Michael one more time and patted his arm," I'll see you later…" He paused, turned around to look at Robert.

Michael stirred a little. Whenever there was tension or distress it would always make him nervous of uneasy, and he knew since Alex was there, there was just too much emotion for anyone to handle. It was ironic that they had met before, but he knew, that in some way, that they had all met each other once, somehow, some way.

His ear's perked up a little as Alex talked. " I should…be uh…going…yeah…going…" He repeated it to himself as he began to walk away but Robert reached out and grabbed his arm, making him freeze in fear.

_"Don't….please…don't touch me"_

"You don't have to go" Robert murmured, Alex's breath growing shorter, and he looked around, for anywhere, anyplace to sit down before he collapsed, luckily, he didn't see anything and opted for Robert's arms and collapsed into them again. His cell phone in his pocket rang, but Robert knew he was out dead cold, so he went inside his pocket and picked it up.

"Hello?" He placed the cold metal object to his ears and waited for them to talk.

"Robert, what the hell?" Jake asked, on the other line, holding his bags in his arms and trying to get a taxi. " What are you doing with Alex's phone?"

Robert looked at Alex and sighed," It's a long…long story"

"Where are you, is he there, can I speak to him?" Jake stopped talking, spying a cab and had to jump in front of it. As the car swerved out the way he dropped to the floor, grabbed his ankle and yelled out in pain," My ankle…oh…" He cried out, rocking back and forth. The taxi driver got out the car and ran up to him," Kid, are you okay?"

Jake's eyes flashed, him groaning before jumping up and saying," Yeah, now can you get me to.." He paused, picked up the cell phone," Where are you?"

"At the hospital" Robert said dryly, " Room 526"

"The hospital, the one at the corner of 22nd and Fotch street, hop to it cabbie" Jake said, throwing his bags into the car and closing the door.

"Damn kids" The cabbie murmured as he closed the door as well and got in.

"Did you just fake getting hit by a car?" Robert asked, beyond shocked and amused.

Michael smiled a little in his sleep.

"Umm…maybe, look, Robert, I'll see you in a few, bye" Jake snapped his phone shut and Robert glanced at Michael and then at Alex on the floor," How does all the weird stuff always happen around you?"

* * *

Marco yelled into the phone," Come on over you guys, I need your help" He sounded desperate and Andy, Brian and Pete had nothing else better to do. A half hour later, because Andy was having an off day and decided that he couldn't find anything decent to wear, they ended up on Marco's couch with him pacing back and forth around them, Ryan shaking his head and Pete eyeing that cookie jar filed with Mrs. Del Rossi's finest, when Marco clapped his hands together making all of them jump, including himself. "My mom is a freak, you guys" He stated it plainly," For the next 22 hours, you will clean, sweep, wipe, dust and polish the surface of every plant, item and piece of furniture" He slapped the duster into his hands," You got it?"

"There's no way in hell I'm cleaning" Brian crossed his arms," This is what I have maids for"

"Rich boy's afraid to get dirty, awww…how cute" Marco teased him, making Brian frown and grab some latex gloves," Bring it on, Del Rossi"

Marco tossed them all different pairs of gloves and other cleaning accessories and sighed," Come on you guys, the faster we do this the faster I can get to my surprise…"

"Which is?" Ryan asked, leaning a little bit too close to Marco for Pete's liking.

"You'll see" Marco teased, wiping the duster in his face and setting his sites on the plant near the stair case.

* * *

Jake slapped his arms," Guess who?"

Alex sat up, and got scared because Jake was breathing in his ear, and moved backwards," Jake, what are you doing here?"

"They let me out" He murmured, some what angry, they were inside the hospital. Someone was behind the curtain, some body who was in a coma or something and Robert was laying in the chair, head in his hands.

"What are you doing here anyway?" He asked," Aren't you supposed to be at school?"

"Same thing I asked him" Robert pointed out.

Jake smiled darkly at him," Hey Robby…"

"It's Robert" Robert said dryly.

"Oh, it makes you sound so old" Jake said, casually, although he wanted to beat him up, and then slap Alex around for passing out in a hospital of all places, and then he realized all that pinned up rage wasn't healthy. He took a deep breath as Alex stood up, loosing his balance as he replied," To check up on Michael" He slipped forwards, not ready to walk and fell into the curtain reveling Michael's ghost like figure and Jake stood rooted to his spot as Alex scrambled around and slid the curtain backwards, but the link was caught, so instead it moved all the way backwards, revealing all of the bed. Robert glanced at Michael's sleeping form and then at Jake's shocked look, shoulders slackened before he sighed," Alex, come on and get in the cab…I…we have to get back to school…"

"But Jake…" Alex trailed off as Jake wandered over, right next to the bed, not looking at Michael, and pulled Alex and placed his arms around him," Take it one step at a time…" As they moved towards the door he nodded at Robert," I'm sorry…" He murmured" Take good care of him, please" And then they left.

Robert blinked.

Did he just give Michael away?

_"Did he just give me away?"_ Michael thought, confused but somewhat happy to see his abuser.

* * *

"The surprise is that I got accepted into a school in New York with this writing gig, so I have to move out this summer…" Marco said while they were all scrubbing the banister.

"What?" They all asked, stopping dead in their tracks.

"Yeah…so how about those Yankees?"

"Yankees my ass, when were you going to tell us this?" Andy snapped, throwing a hand on his hip.

"Um….2 minutes ago…when I told you…" Marco said as they advanced on him, holding assorted tools of cleaning doom. Ryan poked him with the feather duster in stomach," So you're just going to up and leave us huh?"

"I have nothing going for me in Canada, eh" Marco said, covering his mouth," See, I say eh! I'm Canadian, and I wanna be a New Yorker and curse and be rude and party and run people over with cars…"

"You do that here!" Brian pointed out.

"But…I have an excuse to do it there!" Marco pointed out," And shut up, you're rich, you've been there like 20 million times!"

"So?" Brian shrugged," Though stop by the Pink Flamingo Bar at night and tell them you know me and you'll get free drinks…"

"Really?" Marco asked, excited.

"Yep…" Brian said," And they even have a VIP room in the back with stri-"

"Not helping!" Pete pointed out," Look, Marco you can't go, what about the kids, the kids need you!"

"The kids have my mom, Michael and Jake are big boys" Marco said," There's no reason to stop me"

"What about me!" Ryan asked.

"What about you?" Marco asked, confused at how this conversation is going,

"You can't just like up and leave me like this, after all we've been through, the skirts and the drinks?"

"What skirts and drinks?" Pete asked, crossing his arms.

"Boys" Mrs. Del Rossi said, walking into the room with some drinks," I made some Grape Juice for you…"

"You're clinging onto me like you're gay or something!" Marco snapped.

"I am damnit!" Ryan yelled.

"Maybe later…" Mrs. Del Rossi said, walking back out the room.

"Gay drama, woot" Brian and Andy said at the same time. They looked at each other. "Only I get to say that…" Andy yelled.

"No, I created it" Brian said.

They stared each other down.

"I don't like you" Andy sneered.

"Fuck you" Brian growled.

They stared each other down.

Pete looked at everybody, Marco was in shock." What, when were you going to tell me?"

"What the fuck type of straight boy likes to drink champange and wear skirts with you?" Ryan snapped.

"Screw you!" Andy yelled.

"Bite me!" Brian yelled.

"Maybe I will!" Andy yelled.

"Maybe I'll let you!" Brian yelled.

"Okay then!" Andy yelled.

"Then do it!" Brian yelled.

Pet blinked and sat on the couch.

" I thought you were overly femine!" Marco yelled.

"I'm gay as you are!" Ryan yelled.

"You're lying?"

"If I'm lying then how come we had sex in the hotel in Hollywood!" Ryan snapped.

"What the fuck?" Pete asked, standing up.

"Gay drama?" Brian and Andy yelled out at the same time.

"I said only I do that!" Andy snapped, shoving him.

"Well I said I created it!" Brian yelled, shoving him back.

They stared each other down.

Andy launched himself on Brian and flipped him over the couch, " I hate you!"

"I hate you more…!" Brian yelled.

They blinked.

"Make out with me!" They yelled at the same time.

"Okay!" They both replied!

Marco laughed," You've got to be kidding!" He shook his head," No…"

"Hello, Marco…we were drunk, and horney! I did you!" Ryan crossed his arms," So there!"

"What, how…why?"

"Because I have a fucking crush on you dumbass!" Ryan shouted.

Pete gasped.

Brian and Andy were gasping too, but it was for a different reason.

"Okay boys, now that you've settled down, here's your juice…" Mrs. Del Rossi said, coming into the room again.

" Well maybe I have a crush on you too!"

"You never acted on it!" Ryan yelled.

"Because I thought you were fucking straight!" Marco yelled.

"God…" Mrs Del Rossi moaned, walking out of the room again." Maybe later."

Pete stood there, " I'm right in front of you!"

"Pete, I like you and all…but…I…um…." Ryan trailed off.

"My eye!" Andy yelled out.

" Sorry!" Brian yelled.

"Fine then, you have to choose, right here right now, Marco or me?" Pete said darkly.

Marco looked shocked," Wait…I never…" He paused," Pete, your jealous because you think I'm better than you…"

"I know I'm better than you" Pete said dryly.

"What?" Marco asked, shocked and hurt.

"You're a shitty two bit writer living with your mom. I'm a fucking rich boy who travels the world and writes poetry…see the difference?" Pete asked.

"My leg!" Brian moaned.

"Sorry" Andy murmured.

" I'm gonna…" Brian stopped.

"My eyes!" Andy yelled.

"I told you to duck!" Brian yelled.

"Now come on Pete…" Ryan stopped. " Leave Marco out of this, this is between you and me"

"There is no you and me, ever since you met Marco I knew it was just a matter of time…."

"Till what?" Ryan asked, daring him to say it out loud.

" You'd leave me" He paused," Because Ryan, we all know you never know what you want!"

"Andy!" Brian yelled.

"Brian!" Andy yelled.

"Gay romance!" They screamed.

"Boys now this is the last time I'm going to….oh lord, Andy and Brian get off the floor and Christ, put your shirt on!" Mrs. Del Rossi gave up," Look, the juice is on the table" As she walked out the room she murmured "Gay drama"

" I know what I want, Pete, you just never gave it to me…" Ryan said quietly.

"No, it's because that you, the little virgin Ryan, weren't ready. But since Marco swept you off your feet you went fuck it, screw my boyfriend, let me do him…well fuck you Ryan, fuck you" Pete snapped, he walked out the house as Marco and Ryan stared at each other, what happens now?

" Alex!" Brian yelled.

"Brandon!" Andy yelled.

They looked at each other. " Sam Endicott!"

"Will you guys stop doing it on the floor and yelling out rock star's names!" Sarah yelled from upstairs, " We have homework!"

* * *

Yeah...review? Lol  



	19. Untitled 2

**Dedicated to Kami. Because my drunken ass cannot fathom updating while I'm, half conscious. and lizzy, I am going to kick her ass.  
**

**

* * *

Chapter 19:**

Michael was alone inside the hospital, it was night time and it was cold.

But he was dreaming, as he always was, and smiling because in his dreams he was happier.

And if death was like this, he just might let go altogether.

But anyways, back to the dream

Robert and him sat there, swinging their legs back and forth and looking and throwing pebbles in the lake to see who could throw the farest.

So far Robert was winning.

He shoved him," Robby, you have to be cheating some how"

Robert shook his head," No…here…" He said, handing him his lolly pop," I'll show you how" He took his hands in his and guided them," Just pull back" He murmured, pulling slightly," And realease, over and over again…okay?"

"Okay" Michael nodded.

He woke up.

That dream was stupid, but that's why he liked it, because it was stupid. Because he was beginning to like Robert more and more…

And Jake as well.

* * *

Jake turned around and looked at Alex, who writing in his notebook furiously and concentrating on some sort of formula for math or science homework, but it didn't matter, he got up from the desk, in front of the whole class, crossed over and hugged him.

Dead in the middle of class.

"Whar are you doing?" Alex murmured as Jake hugged him, classmates looking on in interest.

"I don't know, I just wanted to hug you…" Jake trailed off," I owe you Alex…"

"Owe me what?"

"Everything" Jake murmured, letting go. He stared at him sadly," I just owe you everything…"

* * *

Marco paced around in the room that him and Ryan shared, nervously biting his nails and wondering and wishing and replying the whole senario over and over in his mind and --

Christ, he wore a hole in the carpet.

There was someone in the bathroom that was connected to the room, probably Robert, because he was about to go out and visit Michael again to make sure he was okay. Marco glanced at the clock: 9:30. It was getting pretty dark and he just realized that he had school tomorrow now that vacation was over, so he pulled off his shirt and flipped off the lights and crawling into bed, dull features; sleepy eyes.

Just as he was about to finally sleep there was another noise, and since everything that had been happening in his life lately, his paranoia had been upped by at least 4 notches, he got up, streaching because he was indeed getting out of shape and nervous, and walked over to the closet and opened it to find nothing.

Breathing in and out he sighed when someone asked out, somewhat timidly " What are you doing?"

Startled, Marco jumped and fell backwards, right into the towel, and towel only clad Ryan. To say that it was an uncomfortable moment was an understatment and the contact of the two made them both flash back to their first time really meeting. Marco remembered it fondly, the car exploding, the whole "Dropping the towel" senerio and the shower scene just to top the cake. It made him giddly gently, but then remembered the also and equally upsetting conversation that had taken place days ago and therefore, pushed away.

But Ryan didn't let go.

"Ryan…" Marco trailed off, confused as usal. And you know, he was getting utterly tired of being the bitch in the relationships. Lets face it, he knew it, he was Dylan's bitch. Laugh it up, he was a stutterly, clumsy sterotype fairy with no idea of sports, a fashion slut and yes, he danced to the weather girls. And he was tired of feeling giddy and happy in front of girls and blushing madly and hidng his face behind magazines with boys.

He was tired of getting bashed.

And he was so tired of having sudden emotional outbursts at the most inappropriate moments!

"Ryan…"He tried again, in the dark, confused and scared.

"Marco…" Ryan trailed off and it hit a note in Marco's mind, the insecurity, the confusion. The thought that Ryan was just as nervous as he was made Marco madly joyful and he was tempted to do the snoopy dance right then and there but then Ryan began to talk again so he silenced himself. " Marco…I'm sorry about what happened…you know, Pete didn't really mean it, Pete is just being…"

"Pete" Marco replied, still being held and nodding.

"And I am….uhh…" Ryan trailed off.

He hadn't painted anything in a while.

"You're what?" Marco questioned, eyebrows arched and lips coyly upturned at the corners.

"Confused" Ryan ran a strained hand through his hair, it was amazing that it still hurt after all this time.

Marco nodded, not talking, just waiting for him to finish.

"I am…" Ryan stopped, bit his lip," Hey, do you want some champange…?"

"So you can drunkenly molest me again?" Marco teased but when Ryan's face paled he remembered that they were still in the awkward phase and decided to go with a casual " Yeah, that'd be nice" instead.

As Ryan swept the hair out of his eyes, pulled out a pair of glasses and poured some champagne, in the dark mind you, because they were so good at it, Marco eyed him contently and smiled, because you know, on some level Marco always knew that he did own Ryan.

He owned somebody for once, and it felt good.

Yeah, he owned Jake…but that'd be incest and he was getting deafly bored of these rather drawled out incestuous themes that were being thrown his way.

"Marco I--" Ryan tried again, turning around and handing him his glass when Marco hastily got up, smacked the glass out of his hand, shoved him onto the bed and climbed in on top of him. " Ma- Mar-" Ryan stuttered out as Marco ran a tongue over his lips and smirked because something had been made clear right then and there:

Ryan was his bitch.

And as Marco stared at him in the darkness, moon like eyes glowing and pale skin shining away he also remembered one thing, that made him bitterly angry, resentful and somewhat happy, in a sick way. He was beginning to understand how Jake felt with Michael.

Not to the extent of Marco slapping Ryan down the steps, he could never do that, or…stab him, or cause a mental breakdown, or hit him with a bat, or kick him, cut him, or in anyway hurt him and - damn if he does say so himself, Jake has fucked Michael in all the ways incept for the good one- but the way of having control.

Make Ryan roll.

Make Ryan jump.

"Mar- Marco?" Ryan stuttered ever so slightly, squinting at the other in the darkness, Marco's weight making him sink into the mattress. " You're crushing me…"

"Nonscence" Marco shook his head, not moving.

"I can't…breathe…" Ryan gasped, his breaths becoming shorter.

Marco kissed him soundly, full on lips, not their subtle semi straight playing around bullshit kisses. So Ryan blinked and suddenly, his breath had came back. As Marco looked at him, wondering what to do next, like potty train and or make Ryan roll over…a trick all good boys learn in time, Ryan suddenly moved forwards, accidently hitting Marco in the rather sensitive regions and making him groan out in pain before rolling over and hitting the floor.

"Marco!" Ryan yelled, looking on the floor," I'm so sorry…"

"Oh…" Marco moaned out.

The mood was gone.

But Ryan, since hanging around Marco had made him ridiculously clumsy, slipped on the edge of the bed and landed ontop of Marco this time and laughed, because Marco was already blue in the face and that just added onto his anger and snorted this time.

"Why does this always happen with us?" Ryan asked, cocking his head to the side and burrying his face into Marco's chest.

"I'll tell you…" Marco took a pained and over exaggerated gasp," As soon as I get the feeling in my nuts"

* * *

Okay...BEWARE OF CHAPTER 20 FOR IT BREATHES ALL OF THE PLOT FOR THE FINAL SEQUEL1! Also, christ, I live on live journal too much! Love you! ALL. LIKE! Something unnatural! 


	20. Chapter 20

**An: I am stopping this story short, 23 chapters or so. So you guys have like 3 more left. And the title of the final part is being called Theatric Infliction, because you know, the paint theme had to end soon. The last story is more sexual, more dark and you will be shocked at the pairings and twists, because you know my flow. And I have a new story comming called the Stockholm Syndrome, so watch out for that.**

* * *

**Chapter 20:**

"When do you think he's going to wake up?" Robert murmured to Alex, both of them watching Michael's motionless body intently. Alex nimbly shrugged, rubbing his temples in agitation and then squinted," I still say he's faking"

Robert shot him a dirty look as Alex got up from the bed and moved back over to the plastic seat and raised his eyebrows at him, a funny look on his face," I want to make a deal with you…"

It had become a sort of meeting ritual, much like Marco's and Ryan's skirt antics, to come to the hospital when they had time off from school and stare at Michael, estimating when he was going to wake up, and have the occasional conversation every now and then.

"How so?" Robert asked, pulling the covers up on Michael's shoulders and wiping a sudden and unexpected tear away from his eyes.

"We, only me and you are to know about this, make sure that after this day, Jake and Michael are to never meet again. Never collide, never set eyes on each other" Alex cracked his knuckles slightly as he thought it over what he just said and added," I mean it"

"Are you doing this because you want Jake to yourself?" Robert asked.

"Like you want Michael?" Alex countered as Robert blushed and sighed," I can't…if they love each other…"

"Robert…" Alex said softly, laughing," Look what happened to poor Mikey, look at the kid, bloody and brusied, is this what you really want for him?"

As Robert sighed Alex continued," And I mean, I can handle Jake…"

"What, no…" Robert shook his head," Impossible. Only Michael can"

"In a sense, yeah, Michael is Jake's soul keeper" Alex cracked a smile," But I know something that even little Mikey doesn't know"

"How-"

"Drunken Jake, first year, lots of talking,. Long story short, I have something against him, are you up to it?" Alex held out his hand, eyes shining darkly.

Robert reached over and shook it dryly.

* * *

Jake held his book bag in front of his chest as he stumbled down the cold and familiar hallways, all the boys moving out of the way for him as normal, but this time it was to avoid him, shun him. He knew that Remy was up to something again, and he was holding back every fiber and ounce in his body that wanted to plaster the kids face onto the side of a milk carton when he walked into someone.

Knocking the books out his arms, Jake bent over and picked it up only to have the person kick the books from under him. He glared up to see Remy, sun glasses fitted, tie in place and holding the formal air that was the Leonardo Splice School For The Gifted And Talented. Jake knew that air well, since he created it. Remy casualy chuckled," I told you boys, he's as weak as ever" Jake looked at the boys behind Remy, committee, his committee," What the hell is going on?" He asked, trying to pick up his books but one of the boys, Jason, he thought, kicked it away from him again.

"There's an emergency meeting, front lobby…now" Remy said with an edge as Jake got up, no books in hand and stared at him," Who the hell do you think you are?" He guestered to all the boys," Who you all are? I'm the one who made this school, not some rich boy preepy freshman. And besides, Remy, you can't call a meeting…"

"But I can" A voice said dryly, voice said.

They all turned around and Jake's face turned white.

"Trey?"

He nodded as Jake sneered," What the hell are you doing here, you have no right to be in this building. Your expelled permently, they don't allow perverts into the school"

"And yet you're still parading around here, and watch your mouth, there's no proof of perversion. Now I have heard of your antics Jake, I know you have built this school up perfectly since you've been here, and been a remarkable student, and then suddenly, this Michael-- am I correct?" He asked Remy who nodded eagerly

"This Michael kid, is messing up your credit, I heard about the dance…the accident, you stabbed a kid, you should be in jail or at least juvie for that…and so, Remy over there gave the dean a call, and made a mighty nice pay of money to get me back into the school. You weren't always head kid here you know" Trey finished off plainly," Your not emotionally fit for the job, I'm here to take back my crown."

Jake looked around into the crowd of faces, all of them his friends, and he realized, by the looks on their faces, they knew what had happened and didn't want Trey there, almost, almost but never, as much as Jake did. And then he realized that Remy had something up his sleeve again, as he always did. " Not emotionally fit? Bullshit, here, fine, I resign, you bitches go and figure out how to follow under his ruling…" Jake wheeled around, scooped up his books and walked off down the hall, feeling broken.

He had nothing left now, incept for Alex, and he was sure he'd do something fucked up for that as well.

* * *

Marco came down the steps, head phones on and about ready to do his 5 minute dash to school since he was late. It was quite easy, it normally takes an half hour to get to school, but with his patented short cut, if you jump through Mr. Felons' lawn, past his rabid boy eating dog, under the small water pass by the end of the park, around the corner, climbed through that small water hole at the bottom towards the creek and then climbed up one of the sewer hatches he'd be there in 5 minutes.

He was a professional, you see.

He bounded into the kitchen, CD switching to the ever so wonderful PJ Harvey and grabbed a piece of toast in his mouth, slung his book bag over his shoulder and ran out the house only to stop when he realized that Ryan was sitting on the porch with his hands in his hair, running it through them continusly until the point of balding before he stopped and tapped him on the shoulder," Rye, we're going to be late to school"

"I was going to take the short cut" Ryan whispered, not moving though

"Wouldn't that mean that you'd have to actually get up--"

"I'm not moving yet, okay? Just go without me…I…" He trailed off, muttering to himself again.

"About yesterday…"

"Not now…" Ryan moaned, " I just want to be alone"

"Just tell me what's going on" Marco coaxed, soft brown eyes interested.

"The hospital called…" He whispered as Marco's face paled.

"What….what happened?"

"My mom died." Ryan whispered.

"Oh…" Marco said, biting his lips. At Ryan's deranged look he tried again" Oh, oh my god…no…how?"

"Why did you say oh like that?" Ryan asked.

"Well. I thought it was Jake…or Michael, cause you know one of the two of them is always getting hurt somehow and ahh…yeah" Marco said looking down as Ryan got off and pulled his book bag on.

"Where are you going?" Marco asked, also getting up.

Ryan pulled out his cell phone, a present Mrs. Del Rossi had gotten him for his birthday and the screen lit up, a little tune of Do You Want To coming on, making Marco remember that he has yet to see the bloody video and watched as Ryan scrolled down and yelled into the phone," Stop smoking lazy ass and pick up!"

"Ahh…my ears" Brian moaned, picking up the phone.

"Who is it?" Andy, on the other couch asked, because Brian had more couches than most people have dishes.

"Shut up, nobody, go back to sleep. We have school in an hour" Brian yelled at Andy before speaking into the phone," What?"

" School started 10 minutes ago" Ryan said dimly as Brian fell out the bed, threw a shirt at Andy and Pete yelled, something about cheese as Brian busted out in laughter and said " School. 10 minutes ago. Lemmy's down stairs. Eat. Get in the limo. I'll make up an excuse"

As Ryan listened to all of this, Marco stood there, because well, he didn't want to leave him alone like that. But you know, he did have school…and well…yeah…

"I'm picking you up, what's the problem?" Brian asked, obviously brushing his teeth,

"Mom died" He said sadly.

"What?"

"My mom died."

"Oh…oh, oh god! No" Brian realized what Ryan said and switched it to speaker phone as Andy, who was trying to suck all the air out of his body to fit into a pair of too too tight jeans and Pete, who was trying to fit too many grapes into his mouth, could hear as well." When?"

" I don't know…I have to tell Robert and Sarah and ….god, why do I have so many brothers and sister, why are there so many people in my life and christ I wanted the ring tune to Michael, not Do You Want To, but they only had this, or The Only Difference, and I liked that song, but I used that as my ring tone last week and I have this horrible headache and oh my god I am rambling over nothing! My mom is dead and I'm worrying about ring tones! That means they're going to go to Karen's to check up on us, to make sure we're with them, Mrs. Del Rossi never filed for custody…" Ryan paused to breathe, " And now where am I going to live, I can't be smuggled out of the US like Lemmy was…and./..I…oh…"

"Shhh…quiet you" Andy said, suddenly by the phone." Where's Marco?"

"He's…he's right here" Ryan murmured as Pete came on," Give him the phone…"

Ryan handed the phone to Marco, fell back against the wall and ran a hand through his hair again. " Hello?" Marco asked as Pete's voice swiftly said " I want you to hug Ryan, and when he tells you to let go, which will be 3 times, just hug him tighter. I want you to hold him until we come, okay?"

"Pete?" Marco asked, confused.

"Okay?" Pete snapped.

"Yeah, yeah, okay…" Marco said, hanging up and walked over to Ryan, standing above him before sliding down and engulfing him into his arms. " No…let me go…let me go…let me go, please…" He sobbed three times as Marco held him stilly, just as Pete commanded.

5 minutes later a limo rolled up and they were snatched in.

* * *

Michael loved his real father. He would always bring him back the most wonderful things, suvinears and jewelry, which he never wore, that was Ryan and Marco's thing, and post cards and such. What Michael loved the most about his father was the way when he was little, he'd dance around the room and sing the one hit song that always haunted him, before he died, his song " Andrew Broke Them All" was a hit. 

Little did people know, that song was about him, Michael's Middle name was Andrew. And his father, often either drunk and or miserable from being on the road so much, would call him Andrew instead of Michael. So in his dreams, his recent ones, after Jake had given the key to his own heart into the hands of Robert, with delicate care of course, he'd been playing that song.

Over.

And

Over.

His dad loved sexual inuendos and sly guitar riffs and often dreamed of writing the perfect song, but in this case, " Andrew Broke Them All" was nothing like that, it was a broken smashed up ballad of something magical, but he never realized it. Michael didn't talk about his dad, he loved him too much to speak of.

_Tiny stars and trinity signs _

_Andrew broke them all _

_Downed air planes and telephone lines.  
Andrew broke them all_

_Laughs alone at nothing so _

_Andrew broke them all_

_ And when alone he laughs so hard _

_He broke everybody's fall_

_Andrew was a twisted boy_

_ He never saw him come _

_And every time he'd see his face_

_ The urge was just to run_

_Breaks the girls and makes boys sigh _

_Andrew told some lies_

_ And when his father used to cry_

_ Andrew told some lies_

Michael played that line over and over again, in some last ditch effort to figure out, why in the hell had his dad hit so close to home with lyrics that wouldn't happen for another 15 years? What was this really all about? Because to be honest, he really couldn't handle anymore shocking surprises.

_Broken eyes and pretty face _

_Listless and so care free _

_Andrew only sold his soul_

_ Bullets and powder free…._

_Andrew tired to save them all.  
Instead he broke them all.  
And with a screw to save his health…  
Andrew broke himself._

The last part of the song scared him. How many times had he tried to break himself?

How many times had he almost done it? He counted:

The time in that Transvestites kitchen under the table

The time when Jake kicked him out of the house

The time when he first met Adrian…he didn't even want to remember what had happened afterwards

Peter Logan…bad memories

Sally Heir…bad memories

Katey Marsh

Sehila Marsh ( mother)  
David Kean

Jake…  
Jake…  
Jake…  
Adrian…  
Oh then there was Jake again.  
And again.  
And again He lost count after twenty.

So he attempted to lick his lips, because he was beginning to realize that if he didn't get up, wake up, try and start life now, he may not be waking up again.

Ever.

It was Febuary 14th that day.

* * *

**_Remeber that song. That's all I'm saying/ _**


	21. Downfall

As you can tell the story is winding down painfully for me. I am having so much trouble concentrating on things and my life is hell. I'm glad that you're almost done with your semister Azury, I need those long reviews to cheer me up. I love you all too much for words. Christ. I had an asmatha attack today, so I'm sort of drained. Ah...this is it. The story comes to a head, all the the couplings you think are going to , or you're hoping to happen, will. Also, Trey is who Alex fears worst. If you remember his not so little problem and peice it together, you'll feel bad for him as well. And a certian somebody is back...tee. you know you missed him

* * *

"It's April Jake, schools almost over" Alex murmured, the sun poking in through the curtains and making Jake violently angry, because he hated sunshine, very, very badly. As he buried his face into the pillow, almost to the extent of smothering himself Alex beamed suddenly, teeth showing, hair messy and eyes tired.

"Where have you been?"

"The hospital" Alex nodded, sitting on the bed," Me and Robert have been taking night shifts, and coffee, coffee is the shit, man. Wow. " Alex tried to kill his buzz by inhaling Jake's morning breath, which worked to a degree.

"It's been a year" Jake said tiredly," He has been in a coma since December, December, Alex"

"I know" Alex said, getting up, bouncing on the balls of his feet from side to side. As Jake rolled out of bed, obviously not in the mood for Alex's happiness he went into the bathroom to take a shower. Alex tossed him a shirt, his jeans and pulled Jake's sun glasses onto his head as Alex, still jittery, fixed his tie in the mirror and adjusted his belt. A few minutes later a soaking wet Jake fell onto the bed, only to be pelted with powder and deoderant and sticks of jelly lip gloss, because Remy had thrown another committee party last night, in the room that he shared and since Trey was now head kid, there wasn't a damn thing he could do about it.

As Jake, Alex leaning on him happily, buttoned up his shirt he asked, eyebrows raised," Are you drunk?"

"Me…oh…no no no no no….never…like…no" Alex shook his head, "Me and Robby were celebrating, big celebration…huge actually."

"Why?" Jake sighed out, taking the sun glasses from Alex's head and putting them on his face, only to notice a black eye there and frowned," Where did that come from?"

"This?" Alex asked, pointing his eye," That's a really really good question…I dunno…" He fell into his lap," I really dunnoooooooo Jakey…but…ah, ha, I got good news, yes yes, very good news, news like…woah…" Alex smiled out at him.

Jake placed a hand to his head, dug into his pocket and pulled out another pair of sunglasses and places them on Alex's face before standing up, sliding his hands into his pockets and cocking his head to the side," What the hell is this that made you get drunk?"

"I was drunk before the news" Alex shook his head," Yeah…I WAS TRASHED!" He said the last part louder than the other sentence and laughed and shook his head " I HAD WENT….to…um…the hospital...to talk with Robby…cause while you're wallowing in self depression, you haven't noticed that I'e been getting drunk because that RAPIST!" He yelled again, losing control of the volume of his voice," Is the new head boy, or did you forget that you saved me from him huh?"

At Jake's shocked and somewhat casual expression he continued on," I went to Trey last night to tell him never to touch me again and well…hehehe….this h-h- happened….he punched me Jake! AND YOU WEREN'T there to save me then…" He licked his lips," I went to Robert and he was smiling and laughing and kissing someone and I thought it was…his brother or whatever because like fuck, I was trashed and then wossh…loll and behold it's your star crossed lover, bed hair and rosy lips in tact, sitting up and rubbing his eyes, still a little incoherent and covered with kisses."

"What?" Jake's heart skipped.

"Mikey's awake" Alex said, falling backwards onto the bed, and repeated it again," Your Mikey's awake…"

"No…not that" Jake said, waving his arm as if it wasn't extravagant news when his heart was doing swan dives off the tip of his mind at the moment," Trey hit you? Again?"

"Oh…no…worser then a black eye!" Alex cried, lifted up his shirt and you could see the purple, blues and golds all bleeding in together, from his belly button all the way down. Jake looked away, he didn't want to know where it stopped. Suddenly he felt broken and upset and grabbed Alex's hand," Come on"

"Where are we going?" Alex slurred as Jake jerked him up, kicked open the door, not even locking it and charged down the aisle. Boys, the whole school were nosey little bastards, began to follow Jake until he was at Trey's door and banged on it." Jake..no…what if he hurts me again?" Alex asked, a drunken whisper.

"He won't" Jake sneered as Trey opened the door, hair fucked and lips pale," What do you want?"

Jake didn't even blink, still holding Alex's hand as he wheeled his fist back and punched Trey, right in the stomach and climbed on top of him. " Boys, I present to you, the best fucking conspiracy of all times: Rich kid and Rapist get it on" He opened the door to see Remy laying there, half awake, half drunk, half passed out, one leg off the bed, a blanket barely covering him. Smoke swirling in the room, obviously some illegal substance.

"You see, boys and…ah…boys, this boy, this fucking boy right here, he is mines, mines damnit" He held up Alex's arm limply and pulled him close," No one, and I repeat no one, will ever touch him or I swear to god, I will fucking kill you. You have voted me out as head boy so that Trey, also the kid you know from the newspaper, for you freshmen and everybody else know from campus, is the same dirty ass mother fucker" He couldn't help cursing," That raped my best friend here, see him, Alex…yeah…you , AV kid, take picture of this. Could take my spot. This is not the case, for Remy, that preppy bastard has been out to get me from day one…he wanted sex, Trey wanted Alex, Alex wants…Alex, what do you want?"

"You" He murmured.

"Me. Yeah, Alex wants me."

"Who doesn't?" A boy in the crowd called out as Jake blushed and realized that Alex had just said. " Vote for me…and now we'll be off to class, Please get him out of my sight before I hurt him badly" Jake moaned out, guestring to Trey's unsconscious body.

"Yes, sir" Jason nodded, along with two other boys as they pulled Trey away.

Jake smiled, it was good to be in control. "Jake…" Alex murmured, still drunk and very much about to throw up. " You're…squeezing me"

"I know public affection isn't your forte, but…" Jake trailed off as Alex yanked him down by the collar and murmured," Can you just kiss me?"

"Why, so you can get your 10 minutes of fame?" Jake teased.

Alex shrugged. " It's 15 minute-" Jake slowly covered his lips over Alex, shyly almost, it's been such a time since a real kiss, before pulling away and laughing a little," Don't correct me"

"Yes…sir" Alex said, before passing out.

Jake loved his fucked up life, and forgot all about Michael's sudden awakening.

* * *

"Michael…" Robert, excited, breathed out, shaking him again. Michael's eyes fluttered open and he sighed," Get that light out of my eye" He, also, despised sunshine.

"Sorry, sorry" Robert said, closing the curtain as Michael sat up slowly and bit his lip. " How long have I been out?"

"5.….5 months"

"What!" Michael asked, blinking rapidly," I thought it had only been a couple of days…"

"No, " Robert shook his head," But you're okay now?"

"A little sore, damn sides, but that's what happens when you get stabbed" He tried to make a joke out of it, but by the pained expression on Robert's face he then asked," Where's my abuser?"

"I don't know" Robert deadpanned. " You shouldn't move around so much"

"Oh, stop, I'm fine" Michael's breath hitched, because he sides were burning like fire and he laid back down," Although…some tape to wrap my ribs wouldn't kill me, you know?"

"Yeah…I'm just so glad that you're okay….I was so worried…" Robert murmured, cheeks flairing.

"Oh don't be such a worried boyfriend" Michael teased, making Robert blink," You heard what I said before?"

"Word for word" Michael laughed.

"I'm sorry" Robert murmured.

"Don't be" Michael sighed," Stop this, stop this this instant, stop being uneasy around me…"

"You're talking like a character out of a 1800 Oscar Wilde Book" Robert laughed out, placing his hands over Michael's accidently.

Just was he was about to pull away Michael pulled him closer and sighed, " Would you be my Dorian Gray?"

"And have my soul become corrupted?"

"I can be Basil?"

"And have me kill you?" Robert snorted," No way!"

"At least I still know my literature…" Michael laughed. He looked at Robert and realized, within a deep breath, and had to do a double take because damn, the kid looked good.

Robert's shy brown eyes were hidden behind black wire rimmed glasses, the square kind, and his skin was a pale, honey color. His hair, cropped to stay tucked neatly behind his ears, poked out from the sides and was brushed gently into his eyes. His lips, pale and red, looked strangely attractive, but then again, Michael was still on morphiene, ( from experiences, on that shit, everything seems either attractive and or really really perfect) He wore a striped black and red button down t shirt and a pair of blue jeans, Robby was never one to match to begin with, and a red cap, a knitted one by Mrs Del Rossi, covered his head, see through though, the light weight summer ones.

_Breaks the girls and makes boys sigh_

Michael blinked, odd that verse came up as he leaned in on Robert, soaking in his warmth and sighed out tiredly," I'm so sleepy…"

"Wait, no, you are not going back to sleep" Robert said, somewhat nervous

"No" Michael laughed.

Robert sighed," Don't scare me like that"

"I can scare you in other ways than that, Robby" Michael snorted as Robert frowned," Like what?"

"This" Michael shrugged, leaning up, tugged him by the back of his neck and kissed him on the lips, soundly and quickly. As he laid back, a sudden giggle coming forwards he remarked," Now you can play the role of jealous boyfriend"

"It's about time you two got together" Andy said, barging in with flowers and balloons and candy." They didn't have "Well You Just Woke Up From A Coma And All I got Was This Lousey Balloon" balloons, so instead I got you "Boys In Comas Get All The Girls…" So I crossed out girls and put boys instead" Andy smiled, handing it over to him.

As Marco entered the room, hitting Andy on the head because sometimes he just didn't know about him, he sat on the bed and smiled," Hey you"

"Where's my abuser" Michael repeated again, hugging Marco, but not letting go of Robert's hand

"Somewhere" Brian shrugged," I Dunno probably with Alex"

"Oh his boyfriend?" Michael asked, happily.

"Boyfriend, what , my son has no boyfriend!" Marco replied, shocked.

Everyone stared at him like an idiot," Hello, Michael was the first"

"And the last goddamnit!" Marco snorted.

Michael shook his head, " Alex likes him…badly"

"Yeah, I'd have to agree" Robert nodded.

"Just like you like Michael eh?" Brian asked.

"You idiot" Pete said, smacking Brian on the head.

"What, we already know! We heard you talk in your sleep Mikey, ice cream my ass!"

"I thought what we did last night was between us!" Andy pouted.

"No, hun, it's a phrase"

"God, back to the subject, Brian, shut up" Marco sighed.

Michael laughed," It's okay, I'm just happy to be awake, did I miss anything…"

"Well…we have bad news…" Andy sighed.

"What?" Michael frowned.

"Uh…uh…I dunno how to say this…" Andy wiped a tear away," But they canceled Queer As Folk…I'm sorry!" He broke down, falling into Brian's arms.

"Noo!" Michael screamed.

They were all very emotionally attached to the show, you know?

After some idal chit chat Marco and to go back to work, writing the best article ever, because he needed to, Andy had to go and get some new clothes for Michaels surprise welcome back home party, which wasn't a surprise anymore because he had to open his big glossy mouth and yell " Gay Surprise Party Hopefully With Sleepover!" in the middle of a debate between Michael, Robert and Pete on poetry in the 1800 (The Picture of Dorian Gray or "Dorian Gay" In Pete's words, was Pete's favorite book)

Pete, who was still uncomfortable around Marco, had to go because he had drafting work to do with his poems, Brian had to go meet with some special "Friends" In New York, he'd be taking the red eye to get to the party later on that week. Only Robert remained.

"So…" Michael trailed off, weak hands fiddling with the strings on his gown, having severe flashbacks of him and Adrian.. " I was thinking, you know, that life is…" He paused, squinting.

"Michael, I like you, a lot" Robert suddenly rushed out, cheeks red, glasses falling off his nose.

Michael smirked as he pushed up Robert's glasses and sighed out," You don't know how long I've been waiting for you to say that"

Robert smiled," Really?"

"Well, yeah" Michael rolled his eyes as Robert frowned and pulled his hair slightly," You're harsh, you could've told me"

"And ruin all the sexual tension?" Michael snorted," Never!"

"Come here!" Robert growled out, pulling Michael close and tipping him backwards.

"Hey!" Michael laughed out," Is this what happens when you're my boyfriend, I get ruff treatment and a daily dose of wonderful dialouge…"

"And kisses, you get lots of those"

"Ah, I do eh?" Michael asked, raising his eyebrows," I have yet to have one of these kisses"

Robert shrugged as he leaned over Michael and wondered aloud," Should I make you wait?"

"What?"

"Should I make you wait?"

"You've got to be kidding me…"

"I mean, this is a really large step and I never had a boyfriend before…and oh oh just fuck it" Robert sighed out, kissing Michael, who was suddenly silenced in his laughter. As he pulled away Robert frowned " You taste like carrots"

"You taste like Italian food" Michael countered.

Robert winked," I try dishes"

"The only dish you will be trying from now on is mines, damnit! " Michael said and then covered his mouth when Robert busted out laughing. " I didn't say that…"

"Okay sir" Robert laughed," I call this dish…" He trailed off, kissing his cheek," Crème of Pallor"

"Pallor?"

"You're pale like hell Mikey" Robert pointed out, moving away.

"But you didn't try the main course" Michael wined, pulling him back.

Robert shook his fingers," In time"

From the door Marco, Andy, Brian and Pete stood there counting their money. " I told you so! I knew it! I knew it!" Andy jumped up and down, " 45 dollars bitches, count it out"

Brian sighed and smacked the 10 dollar bill into Andy's hand, " He could've waited until he got out of the bed"

"I don't want my other son dating, I'm getting to old for this!" Marco cried out.

Andy slung an arm around his shoulder and breathed out," Calm down, hey, where's Ryan?"

Marco's cheek flushed," I dunnnooooo" He dragged it out as Andy yelled again and Brian slapped another 10 dollars into his hand sighing out that he was running out of 10 dollar bills and only had a couple of hundreds left.

"I didn't say what happened!" Marco squeeked.

"Another 10" Andy held out his hand as Brian murmured angrily and told Marco to stop talking before he became broke.

"Ryan is actually taking the final test now, he got in I mean, but this Is for his spot, you know, like what level do they want to put him on, so and so" Pete finally spoke and he turned to Marco, tiredly, shoulders down, " And I'm sorry Marco, I didn't mean all that shit I said, that's just me being…"

"You, yeah I know" Marco nodded, " It's okay"

"Ryan is such an asshole" Brian murmured," Why can't he just have casual sex?"

"Because that's your job" Andy smirked as Brian slapped him on the ass and warned him to be quiet.

Marco giggled as they watched Robert and Michael cuddling.

Maybe things weren't going to be so horrible anymore.

* * *

**I love my characters. Too bad things turn horribly wrong. But then again, I never said my characters have a happy ending **


	22. Chapter 22

Downward spiral. I'm killing this here. All the chapters of the story are done. Here are the last three chapters, back, to back, to back. I want to post the final part on mondy. Azurey, you're the older sister I never had. I love everyone else as well. Damn my inhaler. AN: I know you guys missed flashbacks. So enjoy them as well

* * *

_Rory glanced down at the mirror with discontent as Jake looked at the mirror from behind him and murmured sadly ." Go lay down" To which Rory shrugged, rubbing his eyes and slumping. "Jake?" Rory asked, a little tired, a little everything as he walked down the hall and sat on the edge of the bed, eyes watery. " Sit down, I want to tell you some things"_

_Jake frowned but sat down by his brother and nodded, looking up and wiping the candy from his hands._

_"Things, are going to change…" He sighed out, looking around the room in every direction incept for Jake's as he continued," I may not be able to take care of you and well…mom's a little wonky at the moment, so we can't rely on her. There's some things you need to know, so that if anything happens, you'll be okay"_

_Jake just nodded, confused._

_"First off, you know that you have to take your medicine, right?"_

_Jake nodded once more and chewed on his lip," Why?"_

_"Just make sure that you never skip on it, okay, never skip on it" Rory stopped, pausing to catch his breath._

_Jake just looked at him oddly as Rory waved him off, too tired to finish his sentence and decided to go and lay down_

* * *

Jake balanced his hands on the edge of the sink, looking into the mirror and sighed. Rory's words echoed in his mind over and over again, but he stopped taking his pills days after he had died, days and days of all the oddness. Alex laid down in the bed in the corner, sleeping quietly.

Remy was expelled.

Trey was gone.

So why was he getting worse? And matter of fact, he checked his pockets and tried to remember exactly 8 years ago when he stopped taking those pills that maybe it was time for a refill.

He needed to be fixed.

* * *

Michael blew on the food in front of him, " Mrs. Del Rossi, this is more than enough" He held his fork tightly, bad headache and sides wrapped and tapped up, to make sure the healing was proper, and smiled and nodded. Robert, googily eyed and smiling waved at him from across the table while Marco and Ryan looked on in interest, smiling as well, and matter of fact, looking at each other was well. Things were just getting better and better.

"Fine, but if you want to be a strong boy, like Marco, you must eat your food" As Marco sighed and rolled his eyes, to which his mother warned that they may stick that way, the phone rang. Pushing up from off the table a horse voice whispered into the answering machiene. "Dad?"

"Jake…" Michael murmured, not looking up but instead chewing on the chicken in front of him. Mrs. Del Rossi was on a southern kick lately, mashed potatoes, corn, candy yams, collagens, chitins and rice, steak, and all that jazz. Michael didn't want to be fat, but the steak was too damn good to resist.

"Hi…Jake…how's it going?" Marco asked, it felt odd to talk to his son.

"Alesso?" Jake whispered into the phone, he was in the corner of the room on the floor, the phone cord wrapped around his converse sneakers and jeans which had stains on it, since suddenly, he wasn't able to keep food down.

"What's the matter?" Marco asked, now worried.

"I think…I uh…can you take me to the doctor? Please? I'd go, but I need someone 18 or older to help me get my pills…" Jake trailed off, holding himself tighter.

"Umm…okay" Marco frowned," I'll go and pick you up" As he hung up the phone he walked over and made an lousy excuse about how he'd be back and kissed them good bye.

5 minutes later they were sitting in the hospital office.

* * *

"Okay, now tell me that's going on with you, Jake, you look horrible" Marco asked, squinting through his thick black sunglasses and frowning, " Why didn't you tell me ealier?"

"Because" Jake murmured, " You're taking care of Michael-"

"Jake, you're still my son first" Marco placed a hand on his shoulder," You can still tell me everything"

"Long story short, before I met you I got off the medication that I was prescribed to, and now I'm starting to think that that's why I've been acting so angry and violent and shit lately, and I'm really tired now, and I throw up a lot…and I have these horrible headaches, painful headaches." Jake sighed. " And I just want to feel good again"

"And you will…" Marco nodded as the nurse called out Jake's name.


	23. Chapter 23

* * *

_Michael sat on the edge of the bed, blowing bubbles through the plastic wand that Rory had gotten both him and Jake to shut them up. Jake however, was scowling in the corner because Michael was paying more attention to the bubbles than him, his bestest friend in like ever, and sat down and glared at Rory, who had a look on his face that was all but too amused at his brother's jealousy._

_"I like this a lot Rory, thank you" Michael smiled in content, swirling the bubbles around in the can of cheep liquid and blowing it again. A small, well rounded bubble floated out and drifted across the room over to Jake, who angrily popped it with his fingers._

_"You're welcome, I just wish that Jake over there would like it as much as you did. Matter of fact, Jake, give him your bottle, you're not using it" Rory smirked as he said the last part, as a big brother he had to test him to see what he would do. It was something simple as being generous that made Rory happy to be the older brother, because he knew that Jake would've had a field day with him if otherwise._

_Jake threw the bottle at Michael's head, but Michael simply moved at the last minute, distratced by another bubble to notice as Rory snorted with laughter and picked up the bottle from behind the bed. " I didn't want it anyways!" Jake pouted, crossing his arms and eyeing Michael, who was now happily blowing through two bubble wands at once._

_"Hey, Jake?" Rory smiled._

_"What?" Jake snapped, looking at him, frowning._

_"It's funny when you're jealous"_

_"No it's not, cause I'm not jealo…jeanlo…jealous!" Jake stuttered._

_"And since you can't pronounce things it's even cuter" Rory walked over and pinched his cheeks," Cause you're such an adorable little brother, yes you are….oh…I could just pinch your cheeks all day" He teased, ruffling his hair as Jake slapped his hands away with great agitation. Michael looked over in interest and laughed as Jake pushed his hair back into place and crossed his arms once more," I am not…cut that out!" He yelled as Rory made baby faces at him._

_"I am not jealous of some stuuuupppidddd bubbles cause like, I know…that…uh…umm…." Jake stopped, pissed off, and stuck his thumb into his mouth and murmured the rest, which sent Rory into yet another fit of laughter. Michael finally got off of the bed, happily smiling and bright green eyes warm and handed one can over to Jake and hugged him._

_Rory rolled his eyes," You two are so gay" He crossed his arms, which if you hadn't notice, was a trait that Jake picked up from him and frowned, looking at the two of them as Michael smoothed his hair down and took out the wand. Jake reluctantly let go of his best friend, who was just so warm with the fresh fabric softener smell in his clothes and the scent of flowers in his hair, because they tried dying their hair purple to match the power rangers, but instead it came out smelling like flowers and candy, and took the wand from him._

_Rory looked between the two of them again._

_From Michael._

_To Jake._

_Michael._

_Jake._

_Back and forth. Over and over and then something clicked and he had to stiffle a little gasp, because fuck, he should've realized it before since he was right in front of him the whole time. He was sort of disappointed at the revelation, because he had plans of Jake being the biggest pimp of the ladies ever, but at least he had a new way to pick up chicks with Jake._

_You know how the girls just love the gays._

* * *

_Trent sat down inside the chair on the corner of the room and looked at Adrian, who was walking around in a circle, nervous as hell and sweating. He smiled lazily and opened his mouth as Adrian shot him a dirty look and sighed out, " No incest joke for today, thank you" and then continued walking._

_"I was going to say that you're cute when you get nervous" Trent sighed out," But whatever, I don't understand what the problem is?"_

_"The problem is is that…look…you're like freaking…sexy…Trent" Adrian sighed out," And I am mediocre"_

_"I thought we said no incest jokes for today" Trent laughed as Adrian threw a pillow at him," Adrian, you look fine, stop being nervous. I mean, it's only a date, a date with some annorexic looking white girl. I'd say you should go with Lafanduh, but nooooo you want to go out with little miss I'm a virgin Piper Lewis, but whatever, it's your choice."_

_"Piper's a good girl" Adrian shrugged, wringing his hands, "I need to stop being nervous!"_

_"If you have a kid by her can I name her pre-nup?" Trent couldn't help but laugh as Adrian, horrified with what he said, colasped into the bed and burried his face under the pillow. Several murmurs of "Ohhhhmmmmgffffffggaaaazzz" were heard before Trent looked out the window and saw someone skipping across the lawn. " Hey, what is Nate doing here?"_

_"That kid, the boy that hates me?" Adrian looked up, nervous. " Holy shit, he's trying to beat me up again, isn't he?"_

_Trent raised his eyebrows, "I'll protect you, I am your big brother"_

_"By 9 seconds" Adrian rolled his eyes," You're skinner that Piper is!"_

_Trent looked at his small boyish frame, blonde hair, white shirt and jeans, " But…." He trailed off and then stopped as someone rang the door bell._

_"Is mom home?" Adrian asked._

_"Working"_

_"And dad?"_

_"Dancing" Trent murmured," With Daniella…" He sneered her name._

_"You know, while we can go on about how dad is having an affair this probably isn't the time." Adrian sighed, " Besides, mom doesn't know…" The doorbell rang again. Adrian gasped, quietly and looked around, " What should I do?"_

_"Open the door, dhur" Trent said with a little roll of his fingers._

_"And when he beats me up?"_

_"Um…I'll have the cops on speed dial" Trent shrugged and pushed him out of the room._

_Adrian walked down the steps slowly, suddenly it began to rain and he had just sigh, because now he was going to get bloody and wet, but didn't want to run away, because well…he was at his own house. He hugged his sweater close to him, it was a blue one that had a hood attatached to it and stuck on hand in his jeans pocket as he opened the door to see Nate staring at him, wet and angry. "We need to talk" He growled out, fingers curled._

_"Hi…Nate…I uh…" Adrian started as Nate yanked him by his shirt and dragged him across the law. From the window Trent watched, dryly amused because he knew what was going to happen, but Adrian needed to find out that lesson by himself. Instead, he turned around and watched a re-run of Three's Company, because hot damn, Chrissy had a bangin' body._

"_Nate…I don…" Adrian was having trouble finishing full sentences as Nate stopped, they were outside of the house now fully, it was dark, it was cold, it was raining. He looked at Nate, who was beyond the point of anger and whispered," Well if you're going to hit me--"_

_"About what happened at the game…"He paused, " I want….you know…to say…that erm…I ughh…fuck…you know, since you were helping me with the whole tutoring thing and all…" He shrugged. "I am never good with talking"_

_"But you're good with your fist" Adrian murmured as Nate raised his eyebrows. " Shut up, Addy"_

_"Addy?" Adrian squinted his eyes at the nickname, no one had ever called him that before. Especailly not some enemy that hated the shit out of him. " Well why are you here?"_

_"I don't know!" Nate snapped," It's just…something about you…it….like freaks me the fuck out." Nate ran a hand through his hair," I was just wandering around…and ….it's not fun beating you up anymore!"_

_"It wasn't really fun for me either" Adrian asked, hiding his eyes as lightening stuck out in the distance. " Then why are you really here then?"_

_"I think I just wanted a reason to see you…touch you…" Nate trailed off. " After the games., how I'd always shove you against the walls in the locker rooms…"_

_"I got so many black eyes…" Adrian trailed off, confused at where the conversation was going," What are you trying to say?"_

_"You're fucking weird, Adrian Asher, you're really fucking weird…"_

_Adrian remained silent._

_"Something about you gets to me…"_

_"Gets to you how?"_

"_I don't know!"_

_"Shouldn't you know?"_

_"I guess…" He shrugged," But I don't"_

_"Can I help you?"_

_"Why would you be nice to me?"_

_"Because my mother told me to always take care of others, no matter what they did, who they did, how they did it and when they did it" Adrian shrugged. " It's my unofficial policy"_

_"I just…" Nate stopped," This is so dumb, why the fuck am I talking to you, some fucking geek, in a fucking rainstorm?"_

_"I don't know, but I'm cold" Adrian began to pace around," What are you trying to tell me besides the fact that I freak you the fuck out?"_

_Nate remained silent, "Kid…"_

_"I'm in the same grade as you, and you call me kid" Adrian frowned._

_Nate tried to talk again, but instead he reached out and grabbed him by his sweater again, and picked him up off the floor," I don't like you Asher"_

_Adrian closed his eyes, trying to breathe, " I…know…" Just as he thought he was going to pass out he felt cold lips press against his cheeks, mixed with rain. It almost felt like he was melting, which was odd, but he didn't want to let go, for whatever reason, - he had a date due in 5 minutes actually- and decided to just lean into it. He blinked his eyes, realized it was Nate and had a blank look on his face," You don't like me?"_

_"No" He said, still holding him and not letting go. " Not at all."_

_"Okay" Adrian trailed off, it was so fucking...awkward, he had never had anything like that before._

_" Can you kiss me again then?" Adrian asked shyly._

_Nate thought for a second before he blinked some rain out of his face and nodded," I guess so"_

_Trent watched from the window, pissed that he missed the first kiss but damn, John Ritter had a bangin' body. And a rockin' ass. But like he knew before, and always would know, Nate always had a taste for a little Adrian Asher._

* * *

Spinner chewed with his mouth open.

Marco sat by his computer and frowned at him as Spinner finally swallowed whatever he had been chewing and clapped his hands together, " People publishing is the shit, you know, I read this other story, called Sharpened Art Pencils. It's about this boy…named Kyan, and this dude named Mark and yeah…it's really cool"

"Wouldn't that be slash?" Marco asked and laughed " Hahaha, you like slash, Oh My God…how homo!"

"It's not slash! There was no slash warnings or anything!" Spinner defended himself," I can't believe we're all moving away though…"

" Dude" Jimmy wheeled around the corner," Tilly is adorable"

"Yeah…" Marco nodded," She is" He looked at he computer, the only thing that wasn't packed up as Spinner rambled, " I do not like slash!"

"Yes you do" Jimmy smirked, " You like all that shit, don't you. Let's see…um….Sharpened Art Pencils, An Artful Edit, umm….Winter's Whisper? What the fuck kind of fluff is that? Pink Colored Glasses? I even heard about some thing called Shimark with Mark and Shimmer from that damn Fat Assy show"

"It's pronounced FaTassy" Spinner corrected. "And Shimark is the shit"

"It's slash" Jimmy pointed out.

"No it's not." Marco pointed out.

"Thank you"

"It's smut and slash" He finished as he tapped another box up.

"You know, we won't be that far from each other, with you two going to NYU" Marco stated sadly. " I'll be a shot away from you…"

"And if you leave here, you'll leave me broken shattered a lie…"

"I'm just a cross hair, I'm shot, then we can die…" Jimmy stopped singing along with Marco and Spinner," You guys have turned me white. I need to get some black friends. And get crunk. Yeaaaaahhhh"

"Go get some rims on those wheels then, or some Spinners…tippin' on fo' fos'" Marco nodded," See, I'm black"

"Franz Ferdinand is white crunk, Kanye has said so himself." He nodded," So there"

"I'm going to miss this" Marco sighed," All of us, being idiots. And Craig…oh Craig…"

Spinner stared at him as Jimmy wondered if he could get some gold plates in his teeth, " Where is Craigy anyways?"

"Britian, he went to go write for NME magazine." Marco shrugged. " He said something about following Brandon Flowers around and getting some fashion tips, but I think that he just wants to whore himself out so that way he can get onto an indie record label and become famous"

"Well, me and Jimmy have a present for you, before you go, pack up everything and forget us. Turn on the computer" Spinner nodded as Marco turned around and flicked the switch on.

"Press the button" Jimmy pointed on the screen to the red button in the corner. Marco clicked it, waited a few minutes and then screamed in pure joy when he recognized the Eyebrows of Sex And Slashy Goodness.

"When I woke up tonight I said I…."

The "Do You Want To" video played in perfection in his computer screen and Marco stared through the whole thing in happiness. " I can't believe it…how…I…Alex!" Marco blushed insanely.

"It's a long story" Spinner sighed.

"We have connections" Jimmy added.

Marco hugged them happily, it'd be the last night he was in the house.

* * *

And pouted," This is it?"

Brain looked at Pete," This is it?"

Pete looked at Ryan." Is this it?"

Marco shook his head as Ryan sighed," This isn't it"

Marco glared at all of them," This isn't it"

They were all sitting down at Brain's house, one last sleep over, one last time together. They had played every game they loved, eaten every foods they could and sang every song until they were gasping for air. And now it was just pretty empty now, and awkward. They were all going separate ways.

Pete's airplane was in the morning,

Marco was leaving on Saturday, which was the day after tomorrow.

Ryan was leaving Saturday night.

"I'm not going to college" Andy finally stated, breaking the silence," It wouldn't feel right, high school was hard enough"

Brian snorted," What are you going to do then?"

"Stay with Mrs. Del Rossi, help out with the kids, they love me. Incept for Lizzy, no offence Rye, she's a bitch" Andy stated quietly. " How's Michael?"

"He's okay, being all boy love with Robert, so we're leaving them alone" Ryan answered, looking at the empty pizza box in the corner.

"Hey, you guys?" Brian asked quietly. " This isn't it is it? This isn't our last night? Is it?"

They all remained quiet.


	24. Tyrant

**Final Chapter: Tyrant (Summer)**

Michael wandered around the park, with misty eyes and strange memories that he can't remember if he blocked out or not, all he knew was that there was something….about that park, that drew him to that cold spot on the bench. It was going to be a beautiful day, he was sure of that, the weather man even said so, but at the moment it was as cold and dark as any cynical dream he could've ever had.

Maybe because that was the way he felt.

Or the fact that it was 3am.

Tilly slept quietly inside the carriage, him pushing her back and forth gently with his foot as he idly looked around, dull and bored with how his life was going, but then again, he was never really satisfied with what he had to begin with. He could remember even back to Adrian, how whenever he would get something, the joy was short lived and there was no exception here with Tilly.

He could only pray that someone would be crazy enough to snatch her from that very carriage while he looked the other way.

Then she could have a happy life without someone being over her shoulder to ruin it.

But then again he promised Adrian that he'd take care of her, no matter what. He pulled his jeans jacket closer around his neck, the trees above his head swaying back and forth and tiny hints, very small hints of the sun poking through the clouds above, which were a dark midnight complexion. Maybe the weather man was wrong, and it was going to rain today.

"What are you doing here?" A small and quiet voice asked.

Michael numbly turned around," Jake…" He frowned in the darkness, suddenly feeling even worse than before and began fiddling sadly with the draw strings of his jacket." I was just um…wait, what are you doing here. Don't you live like, 20 miles away from here?"

Jake shrugged," I like this park"

"So much as to wander around here at 3 am?" Michael asked, raising his eyebrows and wondering how he was able to do anything properly around this messed up kid, and he just had a feeling, a burning feeling that he was going to end up getting into a fight with him over something, as usual, because that's just the way there were. " Ah…last time I talked to you, you had gotten out of…that place, so how do you feel?"

Jake sat down on the bench and looked and made a silly face at Tilly, pulling his ears and sticking out his tongue at her. She made a dull face at him before turning around and sleeping again. " I don't think she likes me" He pouted a little as Michael laughed, despite himself." She's tired, Jake, it's 3 in the morning and how come you haven't answered my question?"

"I'm fine" Jake said quietly," I'm fine, fine, fine, fine"

"That's too many 'fine's to sound secure over" Michael pointed out.

"I know, but enough about me. How's your life?" Jake asked, shifting around on the bench, looking at his shoes and around the place, feeling strange and confused as usual, but he was really starting to think that the place that he was in, really fucked with his brain, but he didn't say anything , because he knew that Michael would always catch him in the act, which is sad but he knew he couldn't deny it:

Michael knew him better than he knew himself.

"Did you just…ask me about myself?" Michael asked, beyond shocked.

"Yeah, I uh-" Jake stopped short by the look on Michael's face and suddenly felt even lower, because he just realized he asked Michael something about himself for a change. " How are you doing?" He asked, somewhat shaken, " I want to know everything, Mikey, tell me about you"

"You've got to be kidding me" Michael snorted," What did they do to you?"

"No- nothing" Jake stammered. " Why, do I seem different?"

"You're acting like a strung out crack addict" Michael said dully, still reeling over what Jake said from a minute ago. " You look like you're about to pass out and what the hell happened to your arm?" He pointed to the brace around his wrist as Jake sighed," Oh, I got into a fight with some and Alex had to yank me out, violently may I add" Jake rubbed his wrist," But I want to talk about you"

"No!" Michael snapped, looking and staring him down." Why do you keep saying that?"

"Because I do…" Jake trailed off

"No, Jake, you don't"

"I don't?"

"No," Michael said tearfully," This is just another phase in the Jake Sheild "I'm Trying To Fix Myself Again" program and I don't want to try and believe you again"

"What if this was the last time I went through all of this, what if I actually meant it this time?" Jake asked quietly.

"You sound like me…"

"Broken" They said at the same time and Jake looked up with moon shaped eyes and a pale face and Michael almost fell off the bench because Jake had become the one thing that Michael was sure that he would never turn into:

Himself.

Jake was now a shadow of Michael, Jake was what Michael was hiding away ever since he got out the hospital. And what scared Michael even more was the fact that…he thinks that he put him there. But the again, they always knew that had this weird twisted co-dependency issue, hell, Michael had said it himself quiet awhile ago, but he never, never in his wildest dreams, and hopes, and fears, thought that this would ever happen. He didn't want to switch roles, have Jake be the weak and pathetic one, that spot was taken.

"I am not broken" Jake murmured out. " I'm a success in progress"

"Or a kid in denial" Michael murmured back.

"I didn't come here to argue" Jake sighed," I don't even know why I am here…I'm…"

"What?" Michael snapped," What the hell are you here for then? What could you remotely say that could make me feel better? Or fix any of this…this hell, that you've created, because Jake, I think that there's nothing you can say! Nothing you can do! Think. Breath. Write or whisper that will make me forgive you, feel sorry for you, make me want to…"

"Want to what?" Jake said slowly, quietly, he didn't trust himself to speak at the moment.

" Love you again" Michael said plainly and you mines well had stabbed Jake as well.

"I'm sorry"

Michael blinked," What?"

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, God, I'm sorry, Mikey, Michael, I'm sorry, I don't know how many times you want me to say,. But I'll say it forever, I am sorry, sorry, so sorry, so sorry, do you think that I wanted to do this? Be this way? Did you really think I did all of this on purpose? I can't control it, Mikey, I cant control anything thing, anymore…" Jake stuttered, crying in front of him.

Michael looked away.

Pathetic.

"No" Michael shook his head.

"I give up, Mikey" Jake said, raising his arms in the air," I'm tired of running"

"No…"

"You're right"

"No…"

"Yeah…"

"I don't want to be right" Michael said, shaking his head.

"Aren't you tired of hurting each other?" Jake quoted. He answered his own question as he nodded," Yes, I am"

Michael looked to the floor. He was….giving up? He was giving up? No! No! No!

"No!" Michael finally said, standing up," You are not taking the easy way out, you're supposed to be chasing me"

"I have been for 10 years" Jake murmured." I'm done. I hurt you."

"So what?" Michael snapped," What the hell is wrong with you?"

"I don't know"

"Stop that!"

"What?" Jake asked dully.

"STOP ACTING SO INSECURE" Michael yelled at him," You know and I know that you aren't that"

Jake shook his head," I'm sorry"

"Stop apologizing!" Michael yelled at him again. " Just stop!"

" I don't know what to do, so I'm going to…do something, go off somewhere, clear my head" Jake smiled sadly," Knowing you and me, we can't away from each other for long…" He paused and wipe a tear away," Okay Mikey?"

Michael looked away.

"Mikey, you gotta smile" Jake said using his childish voice with Michael, which made him blink because he hadn't really heard it in a long time. " Come on Mikey"

That just made him feel worse.

"We'll see each other again, this isn't good-bye" Jake smiled at him. " It's more along the lines of…um…well, it's not good-bye" He stood up, brushed off his pants from sitting on the bench and walked over and stood in front of him. " Mikey?"

Michael looked away again, sinking lower into the bench and kicking Tilly's carriage away." Just stay away from me" He seethed.

Jake sighed and sat back down next to him again," Look at me" He pulled at Michael's jacket and made him look him in the eye. " Mikey" He paused to breathe, staring him down darkly into his eyes, swirling with so much sadness and desperation Michael suddenly realized that it was him all along that was the messed up one.

Michael was innocent.

Jake's tossled hair fell into his eyes as he shook a little, holding onto Michael, for support…for…anything really and he laughed.

They laughed together.

Nothing was funny.

Nothing was always funny. Michael hugged him, tightly and sadly,. Because he was afraid if he let Jake go, he would never come back, that he couldn't make it back, because that's just how bad he was." I love you Mikey" Jake murmured softly.

Michael had a severe flashback of being with Adrian as he whispered flushly into Jake's ear," I love you too Jakey" He pushed him away slightly,." Just don't stay away for too long, okay?" He wiped his nose with his sleeve as Jake kissed him on the head and sighed," You know I never can"

And Just like that.

The game was over.

* * *

That's it. Is the game really over? Can it ever be? No, it can't. I'm taking things to a new level with this story. A new twist. A new setting. A new Idea. I can't write happy endings, not yet. I would love to thank all of you for reading this story, it means so much to me to actually have people who appricate me. Especially you Azury, you've been there from the bery very beginning. So here's a sneak part of the new story. New characters of course, and the time warp is slightly different now, we're a few years into the future. If you're confused, then good. Because I can't write things any other way

Page 47: Act IIVX

Jude: Matt are you okay? I'm so sorry, I didn't see you there.  
Matt: How couldn't you, I was behind the curtin the whole time, I can't believe he hit you  
Jude: It doesn't matter, are you okay?  
Matt: Yeah…I got scratched a little, that's all… (Places a hand to Jude's face) Does it burn?  
Jude: Like hell, but I'll be okay  
Matt (Kisses Jude's bruised cheek) I didn't mean for this to happen  
Jude: It's okay… (Lingers for a moment) I just wanted to make sure you're okay. Because nothing can happen to you, you know that right, while I'm here, nothing bad will ever happen to you.  
Matt: I'm scared though Jude, we have to leave now, tonight…  
Jude: Wh- why? What's the sudden rush  
Matt: You're not getting abused anymore, I won't allow it  
Jude: (Smiles) Matt, you worry far too much. But we will leave tonight if that's what you wish. I don't mind leaving at all now that I think about it, we'll be together finally. At last  
Matt: Yeah… (bites his lip) I hope.  
Jude: No, you must believe it, we have no time for hopes and dreams in this sad reality!  
Matt: …  
Jude: (Takes Matt's hand) Tell me. Look me in the eye and tell me you believe it  
Matt : I…I believe it…I believe we'll make it. We have to…we will.

Roscoe looked over the page once more, fixed the last line and then wrung his hands together with a smile. " Brilliant" He murmured to himself, figuring out who was going to play the lead role oppside Andrew. It'd be the best act yet. Of course Jake would have a problem with that , but fuck him. Rosoce owned Jake anyway.


End file.
